Thank آپ all for your kind reviews and ratings =). These are pages 21-30. After this I will post in groups of two seeing as I'm only on page 42. As always, please review. =)
“You know who. Cuddy, the woman who helps آپ study Shakespeare and straighten your Longfellow. And if آپ call her that again یا anything similar to that term I will chemically castrate you.”
“And Cuddy thinks my metaphors are bad.”
“My metaphors open up a can of whoop-ass on your metaphors.”
“You’re a psychiatrist. آپ should be able to figure out what’s wrong with her.”
“Psychiatrist is not synonymous with mind-reader. I thought that she was just upset because she’s a perfectionist and she made a mistake, but I don’t think that’s the case anymore. I think something happened.”
“Yeah, she had sex with him.”
“Something isn’t right with that story.”
“Sometimes a tramp is just a tramp.”
“One, she’s a perfectionist.”
“No shit, that’s why she’s upset that she’s a tramp.”
“If that were why she was upset she would have denied it when آپ accused her in front of her staff.”
“You know, if آپ actually had a rack آپ wouldn’t be so annoying.”
“I know, I wrote it on my Christmas list. آپ can imagine my disappointment when I woke up on Christmas morning, emptied my ذخیرہ and didn’t find fake jugs. However, I must not need them that badly since you’re staring at my natural ones.”
“I make do with what’s available.”
Sarah hopped down from the ڈیسک and smiled at House with false kindness. Still maintaining that demonic smile she lifted her left foot and slammed it into his shin.
“Holy shit,” he exclaimed clutching his ankle in pain.
“That would be for calling Cuddy a slut.”
Sarah then ground her heel into his foot.
“That would be for your remarks about my A-cups.”
“One مزید remark about Cuddy and Evel Knievel won’t be the only person who’s had all two-hundred and six bones in their body broken.”
“You ever considered a career as a dominatrix?”
“Maybe if I ever lose my medical license. I’m going to figure out what’s wrong with Cuddy and then I’m going to mock your idiocy.”
With that she turned on her heel and walked out.
Cuddy pushed the سوفی, لٹانا towards the door using her shoulder. But no matter how hard she tried she could only inch it across the carpet. She was too tired, but she had to get rid of it no matter how long it took. She repositioned so that her back was against the side of the couch. Then as forcefully as she could she pushed against her ڈیسک with her feet. This was a bit مزید productive, but not much more. Finally, after an hour, she got it out to the dumpster.
“You’re life is in my control…”
She kept replaying the scene like a demented broken record. Cuddy clasped tufts of her black hair and paced in front of the dumpster, tears welling up in her eyes. No, she couldn’t lose it, not here, not now. If only Tritter had killed her after he was done. Then she wouldn’t have to deal with this. She released her hair from her grasp and tucked it behind her ears. People would definitely wonder about her if they saw her pacing in front of a dumpster. Besides she had to go ask House if he had any cases. Occasionally people brought them directly to him instead of going through Cuddy. After taking a considerable amount of time to at least, somewhat, تحریر herself she entered House’s office. She could feel four pairs of eyes staring at her. Apparently House’s team, Foreman, Chase, and Cameron, had heard his accusations from the گزشتہ night.
“Do آپ have a case,” she asked warily.
Foreman was the one who answered. “Forty-seven سال old female presenting with pulmonary edema.”
He didn’t really care whether یا not Cuddy had slept with Tritter. It wasn’t any of his business. He picked up his copy of the patients file and extended it towards her. Without thinking Cuddy slapped his hand away. Now all four of them were staring at her in astonishment. Great, how was she supposed to put up a façade of normalcy if she slapped people who tried to give her files?
“Sorry,” she muttered.
Trying to contain her anxiety, she took the file and flipped it open avoiding eye contact with everyone in the room. Her hands shook as she scanned the pages and she hoped no one noticed, but she was fairly certain House would.
“Thank you,” she mumbled. On her way out she picked up the stack of House’s most likely incomplete discharge summaries.
She had to leave before she gave herself away. Later that دن as she was making her way back to her office she heard footsteps behind her. The panic she had been fighting since the night before flared and she quickened her pace. The footsteps kept getting closer and closer until she felt a hand on her shoulder. In an instant she wound up and smacked her mystery stalker with the stack of files she was holding.
“Ow! What the hell Cuddy,” the mystery stalker exclaimed.
She turned to face the person she’d just assaulted.
“Oh God! Wilson, I’m sorry,” she clapped her hands over her mouth, “Are آپ okay?”
“I’m fine. What’s wrong with you,” he asked genuinely concerned.
His concern almost made her tell him, but then she remembered Tritters warning: “If آپ tell anyone I will make things worse for آپ and your friends.”
“I had a little too much caffeine this morning,” she lied.
“Last night آپ left abruptly near tears. This morning آپ slapped Foreman for trying to hand آپ a file. Now آپ hit me with a stack of files, which was surprisingly painful.”
“Was it something Tritter did?”
“He subpoenaed me for the appeal. I have to testify against House.”
“You shouldn’t feel bad about that. House is the one who had six hundred Vicodin in his apartment.”
“I don’t want to send him to jail and be responsible for ruining his career. At the same time if I commit perjury than I will lose my career not to mention my Visa.”
“House probably چرا لیا, چوری کی Vicodin. آپ have done nothing wrong. Do what’s best for you. Don’t sacrifice your life for him.”
“He doesn’t deserve to have his life ruined.”
“Neither do you.”
“He’s my friend.”
“Do آپ have feelings for him?”
“He hasn’t done anything to deserve آپ sacrificing everything آپ worked for.”
For a منٹ silence filled the air between them. Wilson had a sinking suspicion that Cuddy was lying. She had been subpoenaed for the first hearing and had talked her way out of ruining House’s life. She was good at lying. She would have made a very convincing actress. Meanwhile Cuddy was silently praying that Wilson had not figured out that she was lying.
“Is that all,” he finally asked.
Damn it, he was suspicious.
“Yes, that and too much caffeine and I think I forgot to take my Anafranil.”
She opened her پرس, تھیلی and withdrew a bottle of pills. She dumped two into her hand and took them. Hopefully that would make her story مزید convincing.
“Right, if آپ need to talk I’m here until six یا آپ can call me.”
Damn it, Cuddy thought, he knows I’m lying.
“Well I’m going to…go do…medical things,” she said.
“I’m here if آپ need me. Oh, and here are my dictations.”
He handed her another small stack of files.
“Thank you,” she کہا putting them on سب, سب سے اوپر of the others she was carrying.
Then she walked away as quickly as possible. He knew she was lying. Damn. A few hours later House walked into the janitors closet and found Cuddy sitting on the floor leaning on one of the shelves. Her knees were drawn to her chest and her hands were covering her face.
“What the hell are آپ doing,” he asked.
“What are آپ doing,” she countered looking up at him.
“Looking for you. I need a script.”
“Go ask Wilson.”
“You’re mad at me.”
“I didn’t mean it when I called آپ that.”
“Then why the hell did you? Half the people in the hospital think I slept with someone to get this job. Do آپ know how many people have asked me if I would sleep with them and whether یا not they would have to pay for the motel?”
“Why do آپ even care who I sleep with?”
“Are آپ saying آپ slept with him?”
“Why does it matter?”
“Did آپ یا did آپ not?”
“Why are آپ even bothering to ask?”
“Because you’ve been acting very strange.”
“I have work to do,” Cuddy کہا standing up.
She was about to leave when House stopped her سے طرف کی putting his hand on her shoulder. Once again she began to panic. Without thinking she slapped his hand away.
“Don’t touch me!”
Oh fuck, she had just screwed herself over.
“Oh dear God,” House muttered.
Before he could say anything else she yanked the door open and slammed it behind her.
Holy shit, the woman had been raped and House had called her a whore in front of her entire staff. Now he felt like a complete asshole. Not that he would ever admit that to her. He had a very tumultuous relationship with Lisa Cuddy that did not permit him to apologize. He did however feel that he needed to intervene in some way. Psychology however, was not his strong point. So he decided to find someone who was good at psychology and let them intervene. That brought him to Sarahs’ office. As usual he walked in without knocking.
“Cuddy was raped,” he کہا without preamble.
“You think I don’t know that,” Sarah replied placidly.
She looked up from her research and folded her hands on her desk.
“Did she tell you,” House asked.
“Have آپ spoken with her about it?”
“Why not? Aren’t آپ supposed to corner her and be all ‘how do آپ feel about that, Lisa?’”
“With rape victims it is better to let them control the circumstances. I was giving her time to come to me. However, I am aware that she most likely has no intention of doing so. Ergo, I am going to see if I can get her to tell me.”
“How are آپ going to do that? She doesn’t tell people anything.”
“She tells me things. Plus I will use a magical thing called sympathetic presence.”
“You should probably give her low dose tranquilizers as well.”
“No shit Sherlock. This whole situation is very interesting. I understand her motives and reactions. What I don’t understand are your motives and reactions.”
“If she goes psycho, the hospital goes down and I’m out of the job.”
“That doesn’t explain why آپ were so angry when آپ thought she slept with him consensually.”
“If she had slept with him consensually she probably would have turned over to the dark side and screwed me, which is sadly not as dirty as it sounds.”
“You still desire to procreate with her.”
“I would definitely hit that, but I do not want a long standing relationship with her.”
“Sure آپ don’t.”
“When I’m the maid of honor at yours and her wedding I will be laughing all through the priests speech.”
“Can آپ imagine how annoying it would be to live with her? Everything would be so…clean and she would be…herself.”
“Her OCD doesn’t annoy you.”
“Can we focus on the fact that she was raped?”
“Another interesting thing, آپ seem genuinely concerned.”
“She is already unstable and as I کہا before, if she goes crazy I lose my job. Go waste her time and not mine.”
“You can not deny your hormonal attraction to her forever. The Endocrine System will beat آپ down!”
“You ever thought of visiting the psych-ward as a patient?”
“Yeah, but the voices in my head don’t like the furnishings.”
“Right, I’m going to go now.”
“I’ll give Cuddy another hour. If she doesn’t come to me سے طرف کی then I’ll go to her.”
“Great,” House کہا walking out.
If she wasn’t going to talk to Cuddy right away, then he was. As usual, he didn’t bother to knock and ask permission to come in. He just opened the wooden door and walked in. Cuddy was sitting at her ڈیسک reading a file intently.
“You should really go home,” House said.
Cuddy nearly fell out of her chair. She had not noticed him come in.
“Case and point.”
“Why would I go home,” she asked still looking down at the file.
“Because آپ were raped.”
“I was not,” Cuddy denied weakly.
“I’m not an idiot.”
“Why does it matter?”
“Well I would think it would matter because it’s a traumatic experience and آپ don’t like when things don’t go according to your master plan.”
“Why does it matter to you.”
“If آپ lose your mind the board will end your career. They’ll replace آپ and then I’ll have to learn how to manipulate someone else.”
“I’m not going to lose my mind. Nothing happened.”
“Why would آپ lie to protect him?”
“Do آپ need something?”
“He raped you.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You think I’m going to go to the police?
“Not if آپ don’t want me to.”
“I don’t want آپ to.”
“I just don’t.”
“Well, there has to be a reason.”
“Why do آپ care?
“I don’t care. I’m interested.”
“Why? Rape is not some fascinating disease.”
“You’ve always struck me as psychologically unstable. It will be fun to see how آپ handle this.”
Cuddy shot him a look and went back to reading the file.
“You should let Sarah run an STD panel and pregnancy test.”
“I’m not pregnant and I don’t have an STD.”
“Did he put on a condom before he pinned آپ to your سوفی, لٹانا and forced آپ to screw him,” House asked mockingly.
Cuddy didn’t answer.
“Just because it would be adding insult to injury for آپ to have an STD یا be pregnant doesn’t mean that it won’t happen. Life’s a bitch.”
“If آپ get tested now and you’re pregnant آپ can have an abortion legally. If آپ wait a ماہ then آپ are going to have to be a bit مزید creative.”
“I know that.”
“You’re decision doesn’t make any sense.”
“It doesn’t have to make sense to you,” Cuddy کہا quietly.
“Denial is not going to help you. Talk to Sarah.”
With that statement House walked out not wanting to get any مزید involved in this mess. It was Cuddy’s problem not his. And he was not a psychiatrist. Sarah, however, was and she had no intention of backing out that easily. Cuddy would not be able to handle this on her own. Sarah walked into Cuddys’ office and sat down in one of the chairs across from her.
“Want to go get coffee,” she asked.
Cuddy looked at her warily.
“You look like آپ could use some caffeine.”
“If آپ say so,” Sarah replied standing up.
“Don’t آپ have anything else to say,” Cuddy asked as Sarah walked towards the door.
“Don’t you,” Sarah replied.
When Cuddy didn’t answer she opened the door and walked out, but she was not giving up. She went down to the cafeteria and bought two large کیریمل, کآرامال machiato’s with three extra shots of espresso. It was obvious that Cuddy would need help getting through the days work. It didn’t matter what she said. After paying four dollars and twenty cents, she was an employee so she got coffee half off, she returned to Cuddys’ office. Cuddy eyed her suspiciously as she set the coffee on her desk.
“What’s this,” Cuddy asked warily.
“It’s napalm,” Sarah replied sarcastically, “What does it look like?”
“I told آپ I didn’t need any coffee.”
“Sure آپ do. Especially since I’m betting آپ spent the majority of last night cleaning.”
“Lot’s of my things got disorganized. It bothered me,” Cuddy replied carefully.
She sipped her کیریمل, کآرامال macchiato and set it back on her desk. Sarah knew what had happened. Obviously she wasn’t here to chat. Cuddy wished Sarah’d just get to drilling her for information, since that was why she was here. For a few منٹ Sarah didn’t say anything, she just watched Cuddy like she was one of her psychiatric patients. When she finally did say something it had nothing to do with what had happened to Cuddy.
“So, who do آپ like better? House یا Wilson?”
“Why are آپ here?”
“To find out who آپ will be marrying when I am your maid of honor, hint hint.”
“Who says you’ll be my maid of honor? آپ think weddings are antiquated rituals used سے طرف کی the church to control the sexual practices of the people and oppress women.”
“So? I’m your best friend. We’re supposed to hang out, be each others maids of honor, except I’m not getting married, and talk about certain things…”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I understand that. However, in order to اقدام on آپ need to come to terms with your new reality.”
“I know that.”
“I know. You’re not going to be able to run away from this and I don’t want to see آپ go down that path. It’s not a pretty one.”
“I’m not going to get PTSD یا any other psychological disease.”
“Except the one آپ already have, the one that makes آپ prone to obsess over things.”
“I really don’t want to talk about it. It’s nothing personal I just don’t.”
“Did آپ want me to argue with you?”
“No, I just expected آپ too.”
“You have lost all control and are now desperately trying to regain it. Why would I try to take control over your situation? That would not help آپ in anyway.”
“I assume آپ don’t want me to run an STD panel and pregnancy test?”
Sarah nodded slowly.
“You got plans for tonight?”
“Want to do something?”
“Like whatever آپ want to do.”
“I’m probably going to leave here around six. Meet me at my place and we’ll go from there.”
“Sounds good. See آپ later Foreigner.”
“See آپ later evil, conniving bitch.”
“She was raped,” Wilson exclaimed walking into House’s office.
“Who,” House asked.
”Oh her…absolutely not.”
“Don’t lie to me. I have a basic knowledge of psychology. She displays the classic signs.”
“I think آپ are getting the classic signs of rape with the classic signs of being neurotic.”
“Neurotics don’t assault coworkers for trying to hand them paperwork.”
“Apparently Cuddy does.”
“Did آپ tell the police?”
“Why, didn’t آپ take her to the ER?”
“House! She needed to get a rape-kit and an STD panel.”
“She didn’t want me to run any tests. From that I extrapolated that she wouldn’t want to be forced to spread her legs while wearing a paper gown. Besides it happened last night, I’m sure she’s showered سے طرف کی now.”
“First of all of course she wouldn’t want to but it has to be done. سیکنڈ of all, since when have آپ cared what Cuddy wanted?”
“I don’t care, I just didn’t want to go through the hassle of dragging her to the ER.”
Wilson sighed heavily.
“By not taking her to the ER and going to the police آپ are giving him the freedom to waltz right in here and do whatever the hell he wants to her without consequence!”
“He’s not going to do anything else to her. Too risky.”
“Whether he does یا not she’ll living in fear if he’s not in jail.”
“She shouldn’t let it get to her”
“But آپ know she will.”
“Then آپ know as well as I do that she’s screwed no matter what we do. She’ll end up on a hundred different psych-meds and kill herself.”
“You don’t know that.”
“She’s a perfectionist. Perfectionists always fall the furthest from grace.”
“So you’re just going to stand سے طرف کی and let her go down that road?”
“She’s not my responsibility.”
“She’s your friend.”
“She’s my boss.”
“If any other women told آپ they had been raped آپ would’ve dragged them kicking and screaming to the ER.”
“Unlike them Cuddy can آگ کے, آگ me.”
“I’m going to the police.”
“Yeah, publicly humiliating her in a courtroom will definitely be productive,” House snapped sarcastically.
“I’m not going to sit there and let her screw herself over.”
“It’s her life.”
Two weeks later it was time for the arraignment. Cuddy was standing in the hall in the town courthouse, the same town courthouse where she had been awarded her hospital. She was pacing on the same five tiles in exactly the middle of the hall and chewing on her thumbnail. She was screwed. Her life was over, Wilson’s life was over, Sarah’s life was over, House’s life was over, if she ever had children their lives were over, and it was all because of her. Damn it how had Wilson figured it out? And why the hell couldn’t she just conceal things better? Shit, she hated herself. Why did she have to drag everyone else down with her? Then again the judge, Meredith Slater, liked her. Maybe she would believe her and send Tritter to jail. Sure he would only be there for ten years if she was lucky, but she liked the idea of not having to live in fear anymore. Then again, when he got out of jail he’d probably come after her. Her breath caught and she began to hyperventilate. Her chest constricted and she couldn’t get any air. Her lungs and throat burned as she gasped for air. Someone draped their arm over her shoulders and lead her over to one of the benches against the wall.
“Breathe,” Sarah کہا as they sat down.
She rubbed Cuddys’ back comfortingly and rested her other hand on her shoulder. Cuddy sat there, her face buried in her hands, gasping for air. She couldn’t do it. If she went through with this she would pay. And not only would she pay, but her دوستوں would pay. This was very very bad. Why oh why couldn’t Wilson keep his mouth shut? It felt like she had gotten the wind knocked out of her and she couldn’t catch her breath. Her head began to spin and black clouds began to blot out her vision of her incredibly pale palms.
“Nice job,” she heard House hissed sarcastically at Wilson.
“If he goes to jail she won’t be so anxious,” Wilson whispered in reply.
Apparently they though she wasn’t listening.
“That is assuming she lives through the trial. Considering her state for the past two weeks, the fact that she is having an anxiety attack right now, and the fact that she has to give a blow سے طرف کی blow testimony in front of Tritter and several other people I don’t think that’s likely.”
“She should take some comfort in the fact that the judge likes her.”
“The judge is dead,” House whispered in reply.
“It was in the front page. You’re normally the one who reads the newspaper.”
“I didn’t get a chance to this morning. She was only forty-two. How’d she die?”
“She was garroted, probably سے طرف کی a disgruntled ex-con.”
“I assume they’ve appointed a new one. Who is it?”
“Some blonde woman, Thalia Kingston.”
“Shit, she’s a defense attorney.”
“Did آپ تاریخ her یا something?”
“No, she’s worked some controversial cases which were in the newspaper.”
“If she’s a defense attorney that means she will sympathize with ___”
“It means she will sympathize with the defense,” Cuddy sputtered, “Just because I am upset does not mean I am deaf and stupid!”
“Fine,” House snapped, “You’re screwed. That what آپ want to hear?”
“Shut up,” Wilson admonished.
‘You’re suffocating over there because of the trial and آپ have been making yourself physically ill for the past two weeks!! Forgive us for trying not to make آپ even worse.”
Sarah, Cuddy, and Wilson looked at him strangely.
“Go get your act together and get the bastard locked up.”
The hall became silent except for Cuddys’ ragged breathing. She stared at House in astonishment. But behind that he could read a sort of understanding, like she knew all of his secrets. For a منٹ he held eye contact. Then he abruptly turned and went into the mens’ room. Once again a stunned silence reigned over the hall. Slowly Cuddys’ breathing began to steady, but the feelings of nausea and suffocation did not dissipate. Once she had relaxed Sarah grabbed her سے طرف کی the arm and dragged her to the womens’ restroom.
“What the hell was that,” she asked as she released Cuddy.
Cuddy massaged her arm and looked at Sarah feigning confusion.
“What was what?”
“Don’t give me your doe in the headlights act. That thing between آپ and House. That little eye contact sexual connection thing.”
“You know, for someone who doesn’t believe in love you’re really pushing this House and I thing.”
“I have a feeling that آپ two are going to be one of those couples that is lucky enough to have one of آپ die tragically before آپ can start hating each other and break up.”
“You are a horrible person.”
“And آپ desperately need to fix your make up. آپ look like a transvestite hooker.”
Cuddy turned and looked in the large bathroom mirror. Her mascara had run down her cheeks in large black streaks and her tears had washed away her concealer revealing the dark circles under her eyes. For the first time in two weeks she actually looked like she felt.
“Whatever happened with your drug trafficking case,” Sarah asked House.
“The Court of Appeals turned it down,” House replied smugly.
“Cuddy called them and used her magical bureaucratic powers to melt their brains.”
“Ah, Cuddy is good with magical bureaucratic powers. It’s a shame that she is losing her mind.”
“She shouldn’t let this affect her like that.”
“And آپ shouldn’t take that much Vicodin in one day. آپ know she’s going to let it get to her. All control was taken from her and she’s always got to be in control.”
“Well she can’t always be in control.”
“That is true but irrelevant.”
“Then she needs to learn how to deal with this یا she’s…oh I don’t even give a shit.”
“Yes آپ do.”
“No I don’t.”
“Then why did آپ bother yelling at her out there?”
“Because I want to see Tritter go to jail and if she goes up on the stand looking like a whore and speaking incoherently new blonde judge is going to toss the case.”
“You care. آپ are hormonally attracted to her.”
“You’re right I am. I think I’ll go in the women’s bathroom and take her right there on the floor.”
“You’ll do what to whom,” Cuddy asked confused.
Sarah and House turned in the direction of her voice in astonishment. She was standing right beside their aisle looking genuinely confused.
“Sarah was talking about taking a trip to the bathroom. Weren’t آپ Sarah,” House lied.
“Yes I ___”
Sarah’s reply was disrupted سے طرف کی House shoving her into the isle.
“Don’t ignore nature’s call Sarah,” he کہا pointedly when she glared up at him from the floor.
“Didn’t mommy teach آپ not to push people,” Cuddy admonished as she helped Sarah up.
At that moment the judge entered the courthouse and everyone rose. Cuddy went to the plaintiffs میز, جدول and sat down. While glaring at House, Sarah sat down in the aisle where she had been previously.
“You have کہا مزید obscene things to her face. Why shove me out of my chair to cover this statement up,” she hissed.
“Shhh,” House replied, “Show some respect.”
“You care about her.”
“Actually I just wanted an excuse to push you, but if آپ want to think I care about Cuddy مزید power to you.”
“And if آپ want to think آپ don’t care about her مزید power to you.”