He's numb.

She's sick.

His bodies numb.

Her mind's gone blank.

Cuddy's adrenaline paced its way through her body. She'd done something incredibly stupid and she knew that. آپ left him alone in his apartment with Vicodin. You're an idiot, Lisa. She didn't dare اقدام as she laid her head on her knees. Cuddy's sister had long gone. She'd sent her ہوم not long after she'd began to cry. Her sister didn't deserve to have to sit through her pitiful mess that she'd only placed herself in. She'd already agreed to keep Rachel if something happened to her – even with the three kids she already had. Cuddy had never been مزید wrong in her life with her choices. Leaving House alone with a bottle of Vicodin in his time of need and worry. It was too late now to try to back up and change her mind یا change what he was doing. She'd done a mistake, they'd both have to live through this one. Cuddy wasn't going to be his shinning princess – she wasn't going to walk back through that door and save him from his addiction, but she could be there for him, love him – if she could. Rachel and her both needed someone they could always count on, but Cuddy couldn't help but love the man who'd always been there when he absolutely needed to be. Just not at the right times. If it makes any sense.

She straightened herself up to a sitting position and wiped her eyes. If this is going to be done, it's going to be done right. Cuddy leaned to her left to reach for the phone, but found herself not dialing House's number to stop him, but Wilson's number. She held back the sobs that threatened to rack her body, not wanting Wilson to know that this was destroying her – that it was eating her up on the inside.

“Wilson, listen... I know it's late and I'm sorry to wake آپ up, but I need a favor.” Without his complaint already, she began to say what she needed to say, how she'd screwed up, how she'd let House down. He was ashamed of her, ashamed for her – mostly. “Will آپ watch Rachel while I'm gone to see House. I've got to change things around before they get into a bigger mess.”

“I'll be there in ten minutes.”

But as Cuddy arrived to House's apartment, there wasn't an answer at the door, his bike wasn't there either. She rolled her eyes and shook her head. “God, House!. Why do آپ always do this? Always run away from your problems? آپ could have been there for me and I would have never known anything. Why?” She'd thought she was talking to herself, reminiscing what she wanted to say to House, but truly wouldn't. “I love you,” she paused. “But you're never there for me, for Rachel. آپ don't really seem to care about my feelings, آپ play with all the time. آپ try to escape pain سے طرف کی playing the piano, but when that doesn't work, آپ resort straight to the vicodin. Which I'm not standing for.” Her tears trickled their way down her face. She tasted the saltiness of her tears and ran a hand over her face to clear the remains. “You can relapse, I know, but somehow I don't care. You've ran off and married a woman who doesn't mean anything to you, just so آپ could get back at me. I should have realized everything. I should have stopped آپ from the vicodin, I should have stopped آپ from getting married. But did I? No. Because I'm مزید of a coward than you'll ever be. So, really. In a sense, this is my fault. I broke this, I broke you. I can't fix your problem, because I am your problem.” سے طرف کی now, she was sitting sideways on his steps with her head in her hands. She was broken inside, too. But she couldn't steal the spotlight away from House. He needed taken care of مزید than her. “I love you, which is why I don't care about these other things. I just wish you'd کہا no to Dominique, because I miss you. I don't know how to turn back.”

“Wow.”

Simple word. She jerked her head upright to see the man she is forever in love with.

“You've got quite a colorful word choice.”

“How much did آپ hear?” She complied to listen to every word he had, since apparently she'd just made a huge fool out of herself.

“Every word.”

She sighed, “well, آپ know how I feel.”

“And آپ know how hard it is to express mine.” House slowly took a نشست beside of her. “Where did آپ think I went tonight?”

“I didn't know.”

House smiled, softly, something he didn't do very often. “I went earlier today to get a marriage annulment. The pre-nup was set after I married her, now she's long gone.”

“We've got a lot of talking to do, آپ know that.”

“Yeah, but we need it.”

“And I want it.”

Cuddy smiled to herself, but she wasn't listening to her mind anymore, just her heart. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

She leaned into kiss him, but she knew, even in her heart, that this was going to be bad.

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[b]Author's Note:[b/] I wrote this really fast this morning, because I had the dream last night. So, hopefully you'll like it anyway. (: I kinda threw together ideas throughout all eppy's. Enjoy. <3