Chapter 2,
I'm so glad to be ہوم and I almost forgot that today's the first دن of my two ماہ break between legs of my tour. I slowly opened my eyes and looked over at Christian who was still fast asleep. I got ready for the دن and went downstairs to wash the dishes that we used with the ice cream رات کے کھانے, شام کا کھانا last night. I have a maid that can do my dishes for me; but I don't like when I'm not treated like a normal person. If I can do my own dishes then I'm going to do them!
I was in the middle of washing a plate when a bloodcurdling scream came from upstairs. It surprised me so much that I dropped the plate and it shattered into 1,000,000 little pieces. I whispered "dammit; I cut myself!" I ran upstairs and into my bedroom to see what was wrong. Christian was sitting in the بستر hyperventilating and I picked him up into my arms. I کہا "it's alright; I didn't go anywhere! I was just downstairs." He looked at my bleeding finger and کہا "ouch." I کہا "oh that; that's nothing!"
I got him ready for the دن and brought him downstairs. The maid had already cleaned up all the glass from the plate and I کہا "we're going to go shopping today Christian. Are آپ ready to go bye-bye?" James and Tim came out of the security quarters and کہا "you're all set to go to the toy store Michael! We have the store shut down for the دن so آپ can go in there with Christian سے طرف کی yourself." I کہا "thank آپ guys!" James کہا "don't drive too crazy Michael!" I chuckled and کہا "yeah right; like I would drive crazy!" I put Christian down for a سیکنڈ and کہا "I almost forgot about the car نشست I ordered! We can't go anywhere without that!"
I walked over to the closet and pulled out a box containing the car seat. Tim asked "would آپ like my help installing that into your car Michael?" I grabbed the car نشست in one hand and Christian in the other as I کہا "no; I think I can handle it." I took Christian outside to the driveway and put him down on the ground as I کہا "okay; آپ stay right here while I put this in my car. I wasn't worried because I knew he wouldn't leave my side and he was being incredibly patient with me. I never thought that strapping a car نشست into my car would be so difficult.
Finally, I threw my hands up in the air and reluctantly called Tim for help. He came outside and chuckled as he was able to install the car نشست in less than five minutes. I thanked him for his help and put Christian in the car seat. I buckled him up him and got into the driver’s seat. It had been quite a while since I had driven my car because I've been on my tour for so long. It almost felt foreign for me to be behind the wheel of a car.
I drove extremely slow to the toy store and snuck through the back door with Christian; so nobody outside would know that we were there. I shut the door behind me and the manager greeted me with a "hello Michael." I کہا "hi; long time no see!" He responded "yeah; I know! How is your tour going?" I کہا "I'm on a break right now; but all I have left are the American shows and it's over!" The manager looked over at Christian and asked "who's this?" I کہا "this is Christian and I'm looking after him until he can be adopted سے طرف کی a family. Try to keep that a secret though because I don't want the press to be all over him!" He کہا "don't worry Michael; your secret is محفوظ with me!"
I put Christian down on the ground and I don't think he knew what to make of the toy store; probably because he's never been in one before. He clung to my leg as we walked down the aisles and I کہا "you can pick out anything آپ want." I don't think he believed me because he didn't even want to pick up any of the toys. I knelt down اگلے to him and started playing with a "hot wheels" racetrack that I could tell he wanted. I کہا "you want this; so I'm going to buy it for you!" After I put it in the shopping cart, I think he started to realize that I wasn't joking because he started sprinting down the aisles of the store.
I looked at his face when he saw a whole area of the store dedicated to Mickey Mouse. He shouted "Mickey, Mickey, Mickey!" I smiled from ear to ear and asked "you like Mickey Mouse?" He pointed to the toys and کہا "Mike; that's Mickey!" I chuckled and کہا "I know that is! I love Mickey ماؤس too! I'll get آپ some of that stuff!" He کہا "no" and I sympathetically کہا "yes; I'll buy آپ anything آپ want Christian!"
He went back to acting shy and I started putting anything that had to do with Mickey ماؤس into the shopping cart. I picked Christian up and pushed the shopping کی ٹوکری, رکن کی نمائندہ to the checkout counter. After we had bought our stuff, I carried Christian and the bags to the car. I looked at my watch and asked "are آپ hungry? Do آپ want to get something to eat?" He didn't answer me and I smiled as I looked into the rearview mirror and asked "you know آپ can talk to me; right? I don't bite! Let's try this again, are آپ hungry?" He smiled and کہا "yeah." I کہا "then I'll get آپ something to eat!"
There is a پیزا place that I usually go to; so I decided to bring him there because they don't allow the paparazzi to come inside while I'm there. I carried Christian inside and we were immediately seated at a booth. I looked over to the other side and saw my good friend Elizabeth Taylor. I tapped her shoulder and she turned her head to look at me. She کہا "Michael; you're back! Here; let me sit with you!" She came over and sat on the other side of the table. Christian immediately gripped my arm and started to shake. I کہا "it's okay buddy; she's a nice lady!"
Elizabeth reached out to shake his hand and he just hid his face in my شرٹ, قمیض sleeve. I کہا "he is a shy little guy!" Christian climbed onto my lap and started playing with my pair of sunglasses that was hanging out of my شرٹ, قمیض pocket." Elizabeth کہا "he seems to like آپ Michael!" I کہا "I think I'm slowly winning him over!" I took the sunglasses out of my pocket and put them on Christian's face. Elizabeth and I laughed as Christian looked at me with my aviator sunglasses almost covering his entire face. I کہا "you're too cute; I don't know how آپ haven't been adopted yet!"
The waitress brought our food to the میز, جدول and I started to cut Christian's food for him. Elizabeth looked at me and smiled as she کہا "wow Michael; I've never seen this side of آپ before!" I passed him the fork with پیزا on it and he took a bite. I asked "is that good?" He shook his head yes and Elizabeth کہا "I have to leave; but آپ two have fun!" I hugged Elizabeth and she stuck out her hand for Christian to shake. To my surprise, he actually shook her hand and I کہا "bye Liz."
***
I went downstairs this morning with Christian in my arms and he was still sleeping. I figured it was a good idea to bring him downstairs with me because I didn't want him staring me half to death سے طرف کی screaming when he realizes that I'm down here without him. I lay him down on the سوفی, لٹانا and went into the باورچی خانے, باورچی خانہ to make myself some coffee. That's when I remembered all the stuff that I had bought him yesterday. I walked outside to the car quickly because I didn't want Christian to wake up and think that I had disappeared.
I quietly shut the front door as I walked back inside and into the living room with the bags. I knew that Christian would want to play with all the toys as soon as he woke up. I sat there on the floor for 45 منٹ taking everything out of its packaging and when I got to the Mickey ماؤس play cell phone I accidentally hit a button. It started talking and that woke Christian up. He opened his eyes and I کہا "good morning; sleepyhead!" He sat up and کہا "wow; Mickey!" I passed him the toy cell phone and کہا "I believe that's yours!"
I had bought him a set of windup Mickey ماؤس race cars and he absolutely loves them. He looked at me and کہا "I can't wind it up; will آپ help me Mike?" I smiled as I lay down on my stomach on the floor and کہا "I sure can!" I started to wind the toy back up for him and all of a sudden I felt something climbed onto my back. I turned my head slightly and giggled as Christian wrapped his arms around my shoulders. He کہا "you're really fun Mike!" I reach my hand back and tickled his foot. I stood up with him still on my back and ran up the stairs.
I gently dropped him off of my back and onto the bed. I started tickling him and کہا "I told آپ that I don't have a mean bone in my body kiddo!" Christian asked "am I going to stay here?" I کہا "probably for only about a week یا so and then you're either going to go with a new family یا you're going to live with your mommy again." Christian went silent after that and he didn't want to play much of anything afterwards. I wonder if I کہا something that I shouldn't have.
***
I was woken up سے طرف کی the phone ringing and quickly answered it; so it didn't end up waking up Christian. I went downstairs and کہا "hello." The voice کہا "hello Michael; it's Rosemary. I'm just calling to check in on Christian." I کہا "he's doing great; he really warmed up to me! He's my little buddy now!" She کہا "that's great Michael; I still haven't found a ہوم for him and his mother is still dealing with her own issues right now. If آپ don't mind, it's probably going to take a few weeks to find him a ہوم یا for his mother to better herself; so will آپ watch him until then?" I کہا "of course I will; he'll be glad to hear that!" She hung up the phone after saying goodbye and I ran upstairs to make sure Christian wasn't awake get.
He opened his eyes upon me entering the room and I smiled at him. I کہا "I guess you're going to be staying here a lot longer than I expected آپ to." I walked him down the stairs holding his hand and he کہا "I want to color آپ a picture!" I کہا "okay; I'd like that!" As I sat there with him at the میز, جدول with a stack of plain white paper and a box of crayons, I asked "do آپ know what color this is?" He looked at me confused and کہا "red." I giggled and کہا "no silly; that's yellow!" I picked up another one and asked "what about this one?" He کہا "orange" and I کہا "no; that's purple! آپ don't know your colors do you? What about shapes? Can آپ draw a square?" He looked at me and asked "square?" I grabbed a crayon and demonstrated how to draw a square; but he still didn't understand the concept of shapes.
***
Christian has been with me for about a ماہ and a half now and it feels like he's always been here. He's really come out of his shell over the past couple weeks and he's not as shy as he used to be; except with women. Sadly, I haven't been able to invite my mother over to the ranch because Christian spends the whole time trying to hide from her.
There was a knock at the door while I was watching cartoons with Christian on the couch. I got up to answer the door and noticed it was my manager Frank. I invited him inside and he کہا "I need to talk to آپ for a second." He sat down اگلے to me at the باورچی خانے, باورچی خانہ میز, جدول and I asked "what do آپ want to talk about?" He کہا "Christian; he's been here too long Michael!" I کہا "I promised I would look after Christian for as long as it took to find him a stable environment to live in!" Frank کہا "Mike; your tour starts up again in a week and a half! آپ can't take him with آپ all over the world!" I کہا "I don't know why آپ get so bent out of shape over nothing Frank! We still have a week and a half; don't freak out!"
Frank got up from his نشست and walked out the door without saying a word to me. I walked back into the living room and sat back down on the سوفی, لٹانا as I noticed that Christian had fallen asleep. I carried him upstairs and lay him down on the bed. I went back downstairs and sat back down on the سوفی, لٹانا as I bowed my head in my hands. I'm so confused and I don't understand why Frank feels like he has to be so hard on me all the time. I'm just trying to do what I feel is right; why is that so bad? I'm giving a child the chance to have a temporary ہوم until things fall into place for him!
***
I was playing hide and seek with Christian when the phone started ringing and I کہا "hang on; I'll be right back!" I answered the phone and Rosemary کہا "I have some great news for آپ Michael! Christian's mother seems to be doing a lot better than she was and I decided that she's مزید than capable of taking care of him again. I smiled and کہا "oh; that's great!" She responded "can آپ bring him back to London at the end of the week?" I tried to hide my sadness as I کہا "of course; I'll bring him back on Sunday and we can do the trade-off between me and his mother." She کہا "that's great; see آپ then!"
I hung up the phone and found Christian hiding in the closet. I کہا "I finally found you!" I picked him up and brought him into the living room to sit on the couch. I کہا "guess what; you're going to be with your mommy on Sunday and آپ get to stay with her!" He started crying and I asked "what's wrong?" He کہا "I don't want to go back there Mike; mommy's mean!" I looked at him confused and asked "what do آپ mean mommy's mean?" He کہا "mommy yells at me and she's always sleeping because of her medicine." I asked "what does her medicine look like?" He responded "it's a drink and she drinks it all the time! It makes her cry and it makes her mad. I don't like being at her house because it's dirty and Adam is always hurting mommy!" I asked "who's Adam?" He کہا "her boyfriend; he's scary! Please don't make me go back there!"
I sat there silently for a few منٹ because I didn't know what to say. How could Rosemary allow Christian to go back into a ہوم like that? Is she really that desperate to find him a home? I looked at Christian again and کہا "well; Rosemary says your mommy is all better now Christian! I don't think she would have آپ go back there if she wasn't better!" He whispered "I just want to stay here with you! I don't want to live with my mommy anymore!" I کہا sympathetically "I promise آپ that I bet your mommy is all better now! Rosemary wouldn't let آپ go back there she wasn't! I wish I could have آپ stay here until they could find to another family to live with; but I have to go back to work and Frank will be really mad at me if I miss any shows!"
I dried his tears with my sleeve and کہا excitedly "hey; آپ still have a few مزید days here with me until I have to bring آپ back! Let's make the best of them!" I picked him up and brought him outside to the trampoline. I placed him on it and he didn't even know what to do. I started jumping up and down as I کہا "jump!" He کہا "no; this is too scary! I want to go back inside!" I کہا "there's nothing to be afraid of; آپ can't get hurt on this!" I picked him up into my arms and jumped as high I possibly could. He started laughing and I کہا "I told you; there's nothing to worry about!"
***
Here we are in London and I can't believe our last three days together went سے طرف کی so fast. I rolled over and gently nudged Christian awake. He opened his eyes and I کہا "good morning buddy! We have to hurry and drop آپ off with your mom!" He seemed to want to stall everything and I can't blame him because I would've done the same thing if I was in his situation!" As soon as he finished eating, I brought into the lobby of the hotel and waited for his mother to get there.
She was two hours late when she finally showed up and I couldn't believe my eyes. I کہا to myself "Rosemary must be blind if she thinks this woman can care for a child!" The lady walked up to me and I couldn't believe how skinny she was! She's no مزید than 80 pounds and the smell of alcohol was so strong that it made my eyes water! I clutched Christian in my arms and she کہا "hi; آپ must be Michael! I'm here for Christian now!" She didn't even greet him as she took him out of my arms and I passed him a Mickey ماؤس stuffed animal! I کہا "it's nice to meet you" and reached down to grab the bag of stuff that I had bought for Christian. I کہا "this is –" but the woman cut me off and کہا "he doesn't need any of that crap!"
I could tell that Christian really wanted to cry; but I think his fear of his mother was stopping him. I didn't even have time to say goodbye as she turned around and walked out the door with him in her arms. I knew there was nothing I could do because I had no right to decide if Christian should go with this woman. There wasn't anything left to do… Except walked away.
***
I just finished the seventh of my final eight concerts on my "bad" tour and I was sitting backstage. Frank walked up to me and کہا "you haven't been acting like yourself lately! What's gotten into آپ Michael?" I stood up and started to walk away from him as I کہا "I don't know what you're talking about Frank; I'm fine!" He کہا "I just thought آپ would be مزید excited that your tour is almost over; that's all." I picked up an سیب, ایپل from the میز, جدول of food and started to peel the sticker off of it as I asked "what's there to be excited about?" Frank asked "what do آپ mean Michael? Aren't آپ excited to get back to Neverland and be able to visit your mother anytime آپ want to?" I کہا "sure; I guess!" Frank کہا "that doesn't sound very excited to me!" I کہا "whatever" as I walked out of the room and down the hallway that leads to the exit.
My bodyguards James and Tim accompanied me back to the hotel. I disappeared off to my room and shut the door behind me. I flopped backwards onto the بستر and kicked my shoes across the room. I looked down at my aviator sunglasses that were sitting on the nightstand and picked them up. I chuckled and thought to myself about how cute Christian looked when I had put these on his face in the پیزا parlor.
I turned the TV on and noticed there was a Mickey ماؤس cartoon playing. I don't know what came over me and I just started crying. Crying like never before! I think it was because I was holding so many feelings inside and I just had to let them out! I got out of بستر and ran down the hall as fast as I could. Frank opened his door and asked "what's your problem Michael?" I walked up to him and gave him a big hug as I asked "why did I have to let him go? That was so stupid!"
Frank pulled me into the room سے طرف کی my شرٹ, قمیض and shut the door behind him as he asked "what the hell are آپ talking about Michael?" I کہا "Christian! He shouldn't have to live with a mother like that!" Frank کہا "I'm sure he's fine Michael!" I کہا "yeah well; Christian told me otherwise! I have a feeling that he's living with an alcoholic, deadbeat and her abusive boyfriend!" Frank کہا "Christian is only 2 1/2! آپ can't believe everything he says because kids over exaggerate things Michael!" I کہا "I believe him and I don't want him staying there with her!"
Frank threw his hands up in the air and asked "where do آپ expect him to go? There are no other families for him to live with!" I rubbed my eyes and کہا "no; you're wrong! There is somebody that wants him!" Frank کہا "I thought آپ کہا that Rosemary didn't have any families looking to adopt a child that young." I کہا "I may not be an entire family; but one parent is better than none!" Frank's eyes widened and he کہا "whoa Michael! Fostering a child is extremely different from adopting one permanently! You're not ready for that Michael!" Frank sat down in a chair and sarcastically asked "what are آپ going to do; kidnap him from his mother?" I کہا in an irritated tone of voice "no; I'm going to رپورٹ his mother to England's child protective services for abuse!" Frank کہا "there's one small problem with your plan Michael. Did آپ forget that you're the biggest pop سٹار, ستارہ in the world? Christian's mother could make it seem like آپ filed a false رپورٹ and try to sue you! I can guarantee آپ that if آپ get involved she's going to drag آپ through a custody battle!" I کہا "so what; I need Christian back and I'll do whatever it takes to get him back!"
***
My private airplane landed at a London airport and I went to the child protective services building with my bodyguards. I walked inside and کہا "hello; who do I talk to about filling out a report?" The lady at the ڈیسک didn't even look up from the computer as she pointed to the room across from her. I walked inside and sat down at a ڈیسک with a man in a suit. He looked up from his computer and کہا "whoa; you're Michael Jackson!" I wasn't in the mood for all of this and کہا "yeah; I’d like to رپورٹ some abuse!"
The man took out a pad of paper and a pencil and asked "do آپ mind if I ask آپ a few questions?" I nodded for him to continue and he asked "who are آپ filing the رپورٹ against?" I کہا "her name is Melissa Carthage" and he asked "what's the name of the child?" I کہا "Christian Carthage" he asked "what makes آپ suspicious of what's going on in Melissa's house?" I کہا "Christian described to me how his mother drinks all دن long and she is physically abused سے طرف کی her boyfriend Adam. The alcohol gives her mood swings and she takes everything out on Christian; which is not okay with me!!!"
The man filed the رپورٹ and I went to the local courthouse to serve Melissa with custody papers. James and Tim just looked at me in disbelief as they asked "so آپ are really going to go through with all this Michael?" We walked out of the courthouse and I کہا "of course I am! I'm not going to let a child suffer like that and I'm definitely not going to let him end up back in an orphanage!" Tim's cell phone rang and he کہا "yeah; he's right here." Tim passed me the phone and I کہا "hello." Frank's voice on the other end of the phone sounded angry as he asked "where the hell are آپ Michael? Your دکھائیں starts in 20 minutes!" I responded "no doesn't; I canceled it!" He shouted "you canceled it! That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard!” Without saying anything back to him, I hung up the phone and کہا "someone's in a bad mood."
I'm so glad to be ہوم and I almost forgot that today's the first دن of my two ماہ break between legs of my tour. I slowly opened my eyes and looked over at Christian who was still fast asleep. I got ready for the دن and went downstairs to wash the dishes that we used with the ice cream رات کے کھانے, شام کا کھانا last night. I have a maid that can do my dishes for me; but I don't like when I'm not treated like a normal person. If I can do my own dishes then I'm going to do them!
I was in the middle of washing a plate when a bloodcurdling scream came from upstairs. It surprised me so much that I dropped the plate and it shattered into 1,000,000 little pieces. I whispered "dammit; I cut myself!" I ran upstairs and into my bedroom to see what was wrong. Christian was sitting in the بستر hyperventilating and I picked him up into my arms. I کہا "it's alright; I didn't go anywhere! I was just downstairs." He looked at my bleeding finger and کہا "ouch." I کہا "oh that; that's nothing!"
I got him ready for the دن and brought him downstairs. The maid had already cleaned up all the glass from the plate and I کہا "we're going to go shopping today Christian. Are آپ ready to go bye-bye?" James and Tim came out of the security quarters and کہا "you're all set to go to the toy store Michael! We have the store shut down for the دن so آپ can go in there with Christian سے طرف کی yourself." I کہا "thank آپ guys!" James کہا "don't drive too crazy Michael!" I chuckled and کہا "yeah right; like I would drive crazy!" I put Christian down for a سیکنڈ and کہا "I almost forgot about the car نشست I ordered! We can't go anywhere without that!"
I walked over to the closet and pulled out a box containing the car seat. Tim asked "would آپ like my help installing that into your car Michael?" I grabbed the car نشست in one hand and Christian in the other as I کہا "no; I think I can handle it." I took Christian outside to the driveway and put him down on the ground as I کہا "okay; آپ stay right here while I put this in my car. I wasn't worried because I knew he wouldn't leave my side and he was being incredibly patient with me. I never thought that strapping a car نشست into my car would be so difficult.
Finally, I threw my hands up in the air and reluctantly called Tim for help. He came outside and chuckled as he was able to install the car نشست in less than five minutes. I thanked him for his help and put Christian in the car seat. I buckled him up him and got into the driver’s seat. It had been quite a while since I had driven my car because I've been on my tour for so long. It almost felt foreign for me to be behind the wheel of a car.
I drove extremely slow to the toy store and snuck through the back door with Christian; so nobody outside would know that we were there. I shut the door behind me and the manager greeted me with a "hello Michael." I کہا "hi; long time no see!" He responded "yeah; I know! How is your tour going?" I کہا "I'm on a break right now; but all I have left are the American shows and it's over!" The manager looked over at Christian and asked "who's this?" I کہا "this is Christian and I'm looking after him until he can be adopted سے طرف کی a family. Try to keep that a secret though because I don't want the press to be all over him!" He کہا "don't worry Michael; your secret is محفوظ with me!"
I put Christian down on the ground and I don't think he knew what to make of the toy store; probably because he's never been in one before. He clung to my leg as we walked down the aisles and I کہا "you can pick out anything آپ want." I don't think he believed me because he didn't even want to pick up any of the toys. I knelt down اگلے to him and started playing with a "hot wheels" racetrack that I could tell he wanted. I کہا "you want this; so I'm going to buy it for you!" After I put it in the shopping cart, I think he started to realize that I wasn't joking because he started sprinting down the aisles of the store.
I looked at his face when he saw a whole area of the store dedicated to Mickey Mouse. He shouted "Mickey, Mickey, Mickey!" I smiled from ear to ear and asked "you like Mickey Mouse?" He pointed to the toys and کہا "Mike; that's Mickey!" I chuckled and کہا "I know that is! I love Mickey ماؤس too! I'll get آپ some of that stuff!" He کہا "no" and I sympathetically کہا "yes; I'll buy آپ anything آپ want Christian!"
He went back to acting shy and I started putting anything that had to do with Mickey ماؤس into the shopping cart. I picked Christian up and pushed the shopping کی ٹوکری, رکن کی نمائندہ to the checkout counter. After we had bought our stuff, I carried Christian and the bags to the car. I looked at my watch and asked "are آپ hungry? Do آپ want to get something to eat?" He didn't answer me and I smiled as I looked into the rearview mirror and asked "you know آپ can talk to me; right? I don't bite! Let's try this again, are آپ hungry?" He smiled and کہا "yeah." I کہا "then I'll get آپ something to eat!"
There is a پیزا place that I usually go to; so I decided to bring him there because they don't allow the paparazzi to come inside while I'm there. I carried Christian inside and we were immediately seated at a booth. I looked over to the other side and saw my good friend Elizabeth Taylor. I tapped her shoulder and she turned her head to look at me. She کہا "Michael; you're back! Here; let me sit with you!" She came over and sat on the other side of the table. Christian immediately gripped my arm and started to shake. I کہا "it's okay buddy; she's a nice lady!"
Elizabeth reached out to shake his hand and he just hid his face in my شرٹ, قمیض sleeve. I کہا "he is a shy little guy!" Christian climbed onto my lap and started playing with my pair of sunglasses that was hanging out of my شرٹ, قمیض pocket." Elizabeth کہا "he seems to like آپ Michael!" I کہا "I think I'm slowly winning him over!" I took the sunglasses out of my pocket and put them on Christian's face. Elizabeth and I laughed as Christian looked at me with my aviator sunglasses almost covering his entire face. I کہا "you're too cute; I don't know how آپ haven't been adopted yet!"
The waitress brought our food to the میز, جدول and I started to cut Christian's food for him. Elizabeth looked at me and smiled as she کہا "wow Michael; I've never seen this side of آپ before!" I passed him the fork with پیزا on it and he took a bite. I asked "is that good?" He shook his head yes and Elizabeth کہا "I have to leave; but آپ two have fun!" I hugged Elizabeth and she stuck out her hand for Christian to shake. To my surprise, he actually shook her hand and I کہا "bye Liz."
***
I went downstairs this morning with Christian in my arms and he was still sleeping. I figured it was a good idea to bring him downstairs with me because I didn't want him staring me half to death سے طرف کی screaming when he realizes that I'm down here without him. I lay him down on the سوفی, لٹانا and went into the باورچی خانے, باورچی خانہ to make myself some coffee. That's when I remembered all the stuff that I had bought him yesterday. I walked outside to the car quickly because I didn't want Christian to wake up and think that I had disappeared.
I quietly shut the front door as I walked back inside and into the living room with the bags. I knew that Christian would want to play with all the toys as soon as he woke up. I sat there on the floor for 45 منٹ taking everything out of its packaging and when I got to the Mickey ماؤس play cell phone I accidentally hit a button. It started talking and that woke Christian up. He opened his eyes and I کہا "good morning; sleepyhead!" He sat up and کہا "wow; Mickey!" I passed him the toy cell phone and کہا "I believe that's yours!"
I had bought him a set of windup Mickey ماؤس race cars and he absolutely loves them. He looked at me and کہا "I can't wind it up; will آپ help me Mike?" I smiled as I lay down on my stomach on the floor and کہا "I sure can!" I started to wind the toy back up for him and all of a sudden I felt something climbed onto my back. I turned my head slightly and giggled as Christian wrapped his arms around my shoulders. He کہا "you're really fun Mike!" I reach my hand back and tickled his foot. I stood up with him still on my back and ran up the stairs.
I gently dropped him off of my back and onto the bed. I started tickling him and کہا "I told آپ that I don't have a mean bone in my body kiddo!" Christian asked "am I going to stay here?" I کہا "probably for only about a week یا so and then you're either going to go with a new family یا you're going to live with your mommy again." Christian went silent after that and he didn't want to play much of anything afterwards. I wonder if I کہا something that I shouldn't have.
***
I was woken up سے طرف کی the phone ringing and quickly answered it; so it didn't end up waking up Christian. I went downstairs and کہا "hello." The voice کہا "hello Michael; it's Rosemary. I'm just calling to check in on Christian." I کہا "he's doing great; he really warmed up to me! He's my little buddy now!" She کہا "that's great Michael; I still haven't found a ہوم for him and his mother is still dealing with her own issues right now. If آپ don't mind, it's probably going to take a few weeks to find him a ہوم یا for his mother to better herself; so will آپ watch him until then?" I کہا "of course I will; he'll be glad to hear that!" She hung up the phone after saying goodbye and I ran upstairs to make sure Christian wasn't awake get.
He opened his eyes upon me entering the room and I smiled at him. I کہا "I guess you're going to be staying here a lot longer than I expected آپ to." I walked him down the stairs holding his hand and he کہا "I want to color آپ a picture!" I کہا "okay; I'd like that!" As I sat there with him at the میز, جدول with a stack of plain white paper and a box of crayons, I asked "do آپ know what color this is?" He looked at me confused and کہا "red." I giggled and کہا "no silly; that's yellow!" I picked up another one and asked "what about this one?" He کہا "orange" and I کہا "no; that's purple! آپ don't know your colors do you? What about shapes? Can آپ draw a square?" He looked at me and asked "square?" I grabbed a crayon and demonstrated how to draw a square; but he still didn't understand the concept of shapes.
***
Christian has been with me for about a ماہ and a half now and it feels like he's always been here. He's really come out of his shell over the past couple weeks and he's not as shy as he used to be; except with women. Sadly, I haven't been able to invite my mother over to the ranch because Christian spends the whole time trying to hide from her.
There was a knock at the door while I was watching cartoons with Christian on the couch. I got up to answer the door and noticed it was my manager Frank. I invited him inside and he کہا "I need to talk to آپ for a second." He sat down اگلے to me at the باورچی خانے, باورچی خانہ میز, جدول and I asked "what do آپ want to talk about?" He کہا "Christian; he's been here too long Michael!" I کہا "I promised I would look after Christian for as long as it took to find him a stable environment to live in!" Frank کہا "Mike; your tour starts up again in a week and a half! آپ can't take him with آپ all over the world!" I کہا "I don't know why آپ get so bent out of shape over nothing Frank! We still have a week and a half; don't freak out!"
Frank got up from his نشست and walked out the door without saying a word to me. I walked back into the living room and sat back down on the سوفی, لٹانا as I noticed that Christian had fallen asleep. I carried him upstairs and lay him down on the bed. I went back downstairs and sat back down on the سوفی, لٹانا as I bowed my head in my hands. I'm so confused and I don't understand why Frank feels like he has to be so hard on me all the time. I'm just trying to do what I feel is right; why is that so bad? I'm giving a child the chance to have a temporary ہوم until things fall into place for him!
***
I was playing hide and seek with Christian when the phone started ringing and I کہا "hang on; I'll be right back!" I answered the phone and Rosemary کہا "I have some great news for آپ Michael! Christian's mother seems to be doing a lot better than she was and I decided that she's مزید than capable of taking care of him again. I smiled and کہا "oh; that's great!" She responded "can آپ bring him back to London at the end of the week?" I tried to hide my sadness as I کہا "of course; I'll bring him back on Sunday and we can do the trade-off between me and his mother." She کہا "that's great; see آپ then!"
I hung up the phone and found Christian hiding in the closet. I کہا "I finally found you!" I picked him up and brought him into the living room to sit on the couch. I کہا "guess what; you're going to be with your mommy on Sunday and آپ get to stay with her!" He started crying and I asked "what's wrong?" He کہا "I don't want to go back there Mike; mommy's mean!" I looked at him confused and asked "what do آپ mean mommy's mean?" He کہا "mommy yells at me and she's always sleeping because of her medicine." I asked "what does her medicine look like?" He responded "it's a drink and she drinks it all the time! It makes her cry and it makes her mad. I don't like being at her house because it's dirty and Adam is always hurting mommy!" I asked "who's Adam?" He کہا "her boyfriend; he's scary! Please don't make me go back there!"
I sat there silently for a few منٹ because I didn't know what to say. How could Rosemary allow Christian to go back into a ہوم like that? Is she really that desperate to find him a home? I looked at Christian again and کہا "well; Rosemary says your mommy is all better now Christian! I don't think she would have آپ go back there if she wasn't better!" He whispered "I just want to stay here with you! I don't want to live with my mommy anymore!" I کہا sympathetically "I promise آپ that I bet your mommy is all better now! Rosemary wouldn't let آپ go back there she wasn't! I wish I could have آپ stay here until they could find to another family to live with; but I have to go back to work and Frank will be really mad at me if I miss any shows!"
I dried his tears with my sleeve and کہا excitedly "hey; آپ still have a few مزید days here with me until I have to bring آپ back! Let's make the best of them!" I picked him up and brought him outside to the trampoline. I placed him on it and he didn't even know what to do. I started jumping up and down as I کہا "jump!" He کہا "no; this is too scary! I want to go back inside!" I کہا "there's nothing to be afraid of; آپ can't get hurt on this!" I picked him up into my arms and jumped as high I possibly could. He started laughing and I کہا "I told you; there's nothing to worry about!"
***
Here we are in London and I can't believe our last three days together went سے طرف کی so fast. I rolled over and gently nudged Christian awake. He opened his eyes and I کہا "good morning buddy! We have to hurry and drop آپ off with your mom!" He seemed to want to stall everything and I can't blame him because I would've done the same thing if I was in his situation!" As soon as he finished eating, I brought into the lobby of the hotel and waited for his mother to get there.
She was two hours late when she finally showed up and I couldn't believe my eyes. I کہا to myself "Rosemary must be blind if she thinks this woman can care for a child!" The lady walked up to me and I couldn't believe how skinny she was! She's no مزید than 80 pounds and the smell of alcohol was so strong that it made my eyes water! I clutched Christian in my arms and she کہا "hi; آپ must be Michael! I'm here for Christian now!" She didn't even greet him as she took him out of my arms and I passed him a Mickey ماؤس stuffed animal! I کہا "it's nice to meet you" and reached down to grab the bag of stuff that I had bought for Christian. I کہا "this is –" but the woman cut me off and کہا "he doesn't need any of that crap!"
I could tell that Christian really wanted to cry; but I think his fear of his mother was stopping him. I didn't even have time to say goodbye as she turned around and walked out the door with him in her arms. I knew there was nothing I could do because I had no right to decide if Christian should go with this woman. There wasn't anything left to do… Except walked away.
***
I just finished the seventh of my final eight concerts on my "bad" tour and I was sitting backstage. Frank walked up to me and کہا "you haven't been acting like yourself lately! What's gotten into آپ Michael?" I stood up and started to walk away from him as I کہا "I don't know what you're talking about Frank; I'm fine!" He کہا "I just thought آپ would be مزید excited that your tour is almost over; that's all." I picked up an سیب, ایپل from the میز, جدول of food and started to peel the sticker off of it as I asked "what's there to be excited about?" Frank asked "what do آپ mean Michael? Aren't آپ excited to get back to Neverland and be able to visit your mother anytime آپ want to?" I کہا "sure; I guess!" Frank کہا "that doesn't sound very excited to me!" I کہا "whatever" as I walked out of the room and down the hallway that leads to the exit.
My bodyguards James and Tim accompanied me back to the hotel. I disappeared off to my room and shut the door behind me. I flopped backwards onto the بستر and kicked my shoes across the room. I looked down at my aviator sunglasses that were sitting on the nightstand and picked them up. I chuckled and thought to myself about how cute Christian looked when I had put these on his face in the پیزا parlor.
I turned the TV on and noticed there was a Mickey ماؤس cartoon playing. I don't know what came over me and I just started crying. Crying like never before! I think it was because I was holding so many feelings inside and I just had to let them out! I got out of بستر and ran down the hall as fast as I could. Frank opened his door and asked "what's your problem Michael?" I walked up to him and gave him a big hug as I asked "why did I have to let him go? That was so stupid!"
Frank pulled me into the room سے طرف کی my شرٹ, قمیض and shut the door behind him as he asked "what the hell are آپ talking about Michael?" I کہا "Christian! He shouldn't have to live with a mother like that!" Frank کہا "I'm sure he's fine Michael!" I کہا "yeah well; Christian told me otherwise! I have a feeling that he's living with an alcoholic, deadbeat and her abusive boyfriend!" Frank کہا "Christian is only 2 1/2! آپ can't believe everything he says because kids over exaggerate things Michael!" I کہا "I believe him and I don't want him staying there with her!"
Frank threw his hands up in the air and asked "where do آپ expect him to go? There are no other families for him to live with!" I rubbed my eyes and کہا "no; you're wrong! There is somebody that wants him!" Frank کہا "I thought آپ کہا that Rosemary didn't have any families looking to adopt a child that young." I کہا "I may not be an entire family; but one parent is better than none!" Frank's eyes widened and he کہا "whoa Michael! Fostering a child is extremely different from adopting one permanently! You're not ready for that Michael!" Frank sat down in a chair and sarcastically asked "what are آپ going to do; kidnap him from his mother?" I کہا in an irritated tone of voice "no; I'm going to رپورٹ his mother to England's child protective services for abuse!" Frank کہا "there's one small problem with your plan Michael. Did آپ forget that you're the biggest pop سٹار, ستارہ in the world? Christian's mother could make it seem like آپ filed a false رپورٹ and try to sue you! I can guarantee آپ that if آپ get involved she's going to drag آپ through a custody battle!" I کہا "so what; I need Christian back and I'll do whatever it takes to get him back!"
***
My private airplane landed at a London airport and I went to the child protective services building with my bodyguards. I walked inside and کہا "hello; who do I talk to about filling out a report?" The lady at the ڈیسک didn't even look up from the computer as she pointed to the room across from her. I walked inside and sat down at a ڈیسک with a man in a suit. He looked up from his computer and کہا "whoa; you're Michael Jackson!" I wasn't in the mood for all of this and کہا "yeah; I’d like to رپورٹ some abuse!"
The man took out a pad of paper and a pencil and asked "do آپ mind if I ask آپ a few questions?" I nodded for him to continue and he asked "who are آپ filing the رپورٹ against?" I کہا "her name is Melissa Carthage" and he asked "what's the name of the child?" I کہا "Christian Carthage" he asked "what makes آپ suspicious of what's going on in Melissa's house?" I کہا "Christian described to me how his mother drinks all دن long and she is physically abused سے طرف کی her boyfriend Adam. The alcohol gives her mood swings and she takes everything out on Christian; which is not okay with me!!!"
The man filed the رپورٹ and I went to the local courthouse to serve Melissa with custody papers. James and Tim just looked at me in disbelief as they asked "so آپ are really going to go through with all this Michael?" We walked out of the courthouse and I کہا "of course I am! I'm not going to let a child suffer like that and I'm definitely not going to let him end up back in an orphanage!" Tim's cell phone rang and he کہا "yeah; he's right here." Tim passed me the phone and I کہا "hello." Frank's voice on the other end of the phone sounded angry as he asked "where the hell are آپ Michael? Your دکھائیں starts in 20 minutes!" I responded "no doesn't; I canceled it!" He shouted "you canceled it! That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard!” Without saying anything back to him, I hung up the phone and کہا "someone's in a bad mood."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IN A WORLD FILLED WITH HATE WE MUST STILL LOVE
WITHOUT LOVE THE EARTH WOULD NOT BE TURNING THIS VERY MINUTE
IN A WORLD FILLED WITH DREAM CRUSHERS WE MUST STILL DARE TO DREAM
WITHOUT DREAMS ALOT OF DIFFERENT PEOPLE WOULD BE LOST
IN A WORLD FILLED WITH CRIMES,PROVERTY, AND WAR WE MUST STILL HAVE HOPE
WITHOUT HOPE THIS WORLD WOULD NOT BE HEAR
IN A WORLD FILLED WITHOUT آپ IN OUR LIVES
WE MUST STILL DARE TO BE AN INSPIRATION FOR OTHER PEOPLE WHO FIND OUT WHO
آپ ARE AND YOUR MUSIC
1. Because He Seems Like To Be A Fun Person To Hang Out With And
2.Because He Seems Nice And Caring.
When He Was Born Back In 2002 I Just Turned 8 And Now I Feel Old When Im Only 18 Lol. Well Thats All I Wanted To Say So Yeah.
Happy BirthDay Blanket I Hope Its A Good One And I Hope آپ Have Fun. Lots Of L.O.V.E.<3
P.S. Always Remember That The MJFamily Will Always L.O.V.E.<3 آپ Forever!!!!!!!!!!!!