As I walked back ہوم with my دوستوں Flick, and Schwartz (with Randy following behind us) four hooves were seen behind a fence.

Schwartz: Boy. Did آپ see how it stuck?
Ralphie: Did it hurt Flick?
Flick: Nah. I barely felt a thing, but these bandages need to stay on my tongue.
Schwartz: آپ sure were bawling.
Flick: I never bawled.
Schwartz: Ah, baloney.
??: *Laughing*
Ralphie, Flick, and Schwartz: *Stop walking, and slowly turn around*
Scut: *Sticks his head out from behind fence, and continues laughing*
Ralphie: Scut Farcus.

Scut Farcus! What a rotten name.

Scut: *Pushes Randy onto ground*

We were trapped. There he stood, between us and the alley. Scut Farkus staring out at us with his yellow eyes. He had yellow eyes! So, help me, God! Yellow eyes!

Scut: *Shouts*
Ralphie, Flick, and Schwartz: *Screaming, while running to garage. They start to climb up*
Grover: *Pops up through hole in garage* RAHHH!!
Ralphie, Flick, and Schwartz: *Running back to Scut while screaming*

Grover Dill!! Farcus' creepy little toady. He was mean, rotten. His lips curled over his green teeth! Randy laid there like a slug. It was his only form of self defense.

Scut: *Grabs Schwartz*
Schwartz: AH!!
Ralphie, and Flick: *Standing اگلے to Randy*
Scut: Say uncle!
Schwartz: Uncle!!
Scut: A little louder.
Schwartz: Uncle!!
Scut: Louder!
Schwartz: UNCLE!!!!!!!!
Scut: *Pushes Schwartz towards Ralphie*

In our world, آپ were either a bully, a toady, یا a nameless فہرست of victims.

Grover: Alright. Who's next?
Randy: *Stands up*
Grover: Rah!!
Ralphie, Randy, Flick, and Schwartz: *Running away*
Scut: *Laughing*
Grover: *Laughing, and lightly punches Scut*
Scut: *Lightly punches Grover, and laughes*
Grover: *Punches Scut, and laughs*
Scut: *Punches Grover*
Grover: Ow. Man!

In the jungles of kid-dom, the mind changes gears rapidly. Weeks ago, I have sent for a secret decoder pin from Little Orphan Annie.

Ralphie: *Checks mailbox, and sees it empty*

Oh, scumped again. No matter, today I had serious work to do.

Ralphie: *Looks at theme* What I want for Christmas. What I want for Christmas is an official Red Ryder, کاربائن, قرابین action, two-hundred shot range model air رائفل with a compass on the stock. Boy, that's great. I think everypony should get one. They would make a really great Christmas present. I don't think that a football would make a very good Christmas present.

Ah, perfection at it's finest.

Dad: *Pulling into driveway, and honks horn nine times. He gets out of the car with a telegram* It's coming tonight tonight tonight!
Dogs: *Arrive*
Dad: No! Get out of here!!
Ralphie: *Looks out bedroom window*

Aha, the bumpus hounds. Da da da da, da da! Our hillbilly neighbors had at least seven hundred, and eighty five smelly hound dogs.

Dogs: *Walking through house*
Dad: No! Get of here!! ارے Bumpuses, come get your dogs here!!!!
Dogs: *Getting out of house*
Dad: ارے honey, get over here!
Ralphie: *Walks downstairs*
Mother: *Arrives* What? What? What is it?
Dad: A major prize, a major prize! I won, I won, I won! Look at this. *Shows telegram* Western Union Telegram. Tonight! Tonight! It's coming Tonight! Tonight! Tonight! Tonight! Hot Damn, Tonight!
Mother: What does this mean here?
Dad: It means it's coming tonight. *Hears scratching noise at door. He goes to it, and opens it* Go on, get out of here آپ dogs! *Closes door on dog's ear*
Dog: *Whimpering loudly*
Dad: آپ know what it could be? It could be the fifty thousand bucks I mentioned earlier today. *Opens door*
Dog: *Walks away*
Dad: Serves آپ right آپ smelly bugger! *Closes door* Or, it could be a bowling alley. I always wanted one of those!
Mother: How are they gonna deliver a bowling alley here سے طرف کی tonight?
Dad: Well... آپ know I was just teasing. I wasn't really expecting a bowling alley.. *Pats Ralphie on the shoulder* What do آپ say we eat dinner? I'm starving.
Ralphie: *Shakes head yes*

2 B Continued