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When you're happy and آپ know it bomb Iraq
If آپ cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are frisky,
Pakistan is looking shifty,
North Korea is too risky,
Bomb Iraq.

If آپ never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If آپ think Saddam's gone mad,
With the weapons that he had,
(And he tried to kill your dad),
Bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think someone's dismissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb Iraq.

If your corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding that ain't easy,
And your manhood's getting queasy,
Bomb Iraq.

It's 'pre-emptive non-aggression', bomb Iraq.
Let's prevent this mass destruction, bomb Iraq.
They've got weapons we can't see,
And that's good enough for me
'Cos it's all the proof I need
Bomb Iraq.

Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
For our might knows not our borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree? We'll call it treason,
Let's make war not love this season,
Even if we have no reason,
Bomb Iraq.


Last night I lay in my بستر looking up at the stars,
the beautiful sky and the endless horizon
and suddenly I thought where the fuck is my roof?

To all medics: As from may 2001 viagra will only be available from the pharmacy under its chemical name. Please ask for ……….
Mycoxaflopin    

Humpty dumpty fucked a fat whore,
Humpty dumpty fell on the floor,
All the kings horses
and all the kings men bent the کتیا, کتيا over
and fucked her again

Sing a song of syphillis
a fanny fulla crabs
four and twenty blackheads twice as many scabs,
when the scabs pop open
the heads begin to sing
wasn't it a minging cunt to stick your penis in

It's not the length its not the size
its how many times آپ can make it rise

Roses are red Violets are blue
I have crabs and now so do you


(for Mobile phone)
Do u take me 2 b ur lawful wedded text m8,
2 have & 2 hold 4 dirty jokes & saucy quotes,
through poor reception & no signal,
until low battery do us part.

Last night i wanted آپ
I needed آپ so badly it hurt.
I wanted you
inside me to work your magic on me
but i couldn't find آپ
………… stupid paracetamol

Sex is a sin,
sins are forbidden,
sins are forgiven
so get stuck in

I love the way it rubs against my soft گلابی flesh
and creates a foamy liquid
as it thrusts in and out up and down
I can't wait for the اگلے time
I love my toothbrush

Twinkle, twinkle, massive knob.
Mary likes it in her gob
but when she feels that certaim twitch
she pulls it out the spiteful bitch.

Three blond MEN are stranded on one side of a wide river, and don't know how to get across.
The first man prays to God to make him smart enough to figure out how to پار, صلیب the river, so God turns him into a brown-haired man and he swims across.
The سیکنڈ man prays to God to make him even smarter, so God turns him into a dark-haired man and he builds a کشتی and rows across.
Then the third man prays to God to make him the smartest of all, so God turns him into a woman and he walks across the bridge

(for a mobile phone)
You're so sexy, آپ drive me insane.
آپ fuck me so hard I'm always in pain.
Your sexy voice puts in slumber.
Oh fuck I'm sorry I've got the wrong number...

Mirror, mirror on the wall,
whos the fairest of them all?
The mirror laughed and gave a grunt,
Its not you, آپ ugly cunt!
added by kingcesar67
added by ShadowFan100
added by ShadowFan100
added by SilentForce
added by TheLefteris24
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see. *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see.
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see. *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see.


Frank: A trailer?
Martha: What do we need a trailer for?
Sonic: Advertising.
Sean: Sonic is right. I want people to know about my operations.
Frank: What operations?
Guy: Our operations to defeat the N.V.A!
U.S Ponies: *Holding M16's with bayonets* Oorah!
Sean: No no, a different type of operation. Observe.

Song: link

Coming soon to this very club.


Sean: *Going 75 miles an گھنٹہ with seven coaches*

Be sure to check out Trainz on the Thomas The Tank Engine club.

Victoria: *Double heading a freight train with...
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added by TheLefteris24
posted by Windrises
Notes: Credit goes to the creators and owners of Game of Thrones. This پرستار story is meant for comedy so please don't take it seriously.

Sansa Stark walked outside the kingdom. It was late in the morning, but she was already tired.

Tyrion walked to her and کہا "How's it going?"

She کہا "Bad and I won't tell آپ why." Tyrion could tell she was in a bad mood so he walked away.

She felt like talking to nobody, but Jon Snow showed up. She growled.

Jon Snow کہا "I have sad news. Grand Maester Pycelle got killed."

She sarcastically کہا "I'm going to miss that creepy old guy."

Jon کہا "Sister...
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added by ace2000
added by PsychoTeddy
Source: Sugar Glider
I'm writing this مضمون because this has been in my mind for so long that I need to bring this up sooner یا later. Whenever people stated Shou Tucker as a worst father ever, I immediately thought of this guy. Meet Doctor Mar Londo, the father of Brin Londo, who is commonly known as Timber Wolf. Dr. Londo is from the comic book series called "Legion of Super-Heroes". I'm going to analyze his actions in the cartoon adaption and then I'll give my reason why he's worse than Shou Tucker, in my opinion at least.

In the episode "Timber Wolf", in the planet "Rawl", Dr. Londo dragged his own son, Brin,...
continue reading...
added by ace2000
added by AnxiousSoul
Source: tumblr-l8m0vmZ33o1qc2zn8o1-1280.jpg
added by ace2000
added by ace2000
posted by CokeTheUmbreon
 Motherfucking animals! -Martin Garrix
Motherfucking animals! -Martin Garrix
Hey, Fanpoppers! CokeTheUmbreon here, and I'm gonna tell آپ my پسندیدہ yo mama jokes! Please note that I don't own most of these. The jokes I do own will have a random emoji سے طرف کی dem. I was bored thnx to the inactivity and my friend not being around to RP with me today.

P.S. The random emojis neither the Umbreon pics will fit the theme of the jokes.

Anyways, let's get it on!

Yo mama so fat when she walks her love handles hit the quan. 😎

Yo mama so stank they use her bathwater as chemical weapons.

Yo mama so fat when she outweighs Groudon. 😈

Yo mama so ugly she gave Darkrai nightmares.

Yo mama...
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added by Eula2003
added by ace2000
posted by pinkydoll
1-Dolphin sleeps with one eye open.

2-"silent" and "listen" use exactly the same letters.

3-An octopus has two hearts

4-Bull frogs do not sleep.

5-There are مزید chickens than human in the world.

6-flamingos gets their distinctive color from the food they eat.

7-The hair of polar برداشت, ریچھ is not white it's transparent.

8-Turtles can breathe through their rear-rends

9-The sun comprises 99% of total mass of our solar system.

10-Butterflies taste with their feet.

11-Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

12-there are about 550 hairs in each of your eyebrow.

13-A سست can sleep for 3 years.

14-A human eye can distinguish 10 million different colors.

15-Women blink their eyes twice than men.
added by Mollymolata