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1.Do not introduce self as roleplaying character in public.
2.Do not talk to fictional characters in public.
3.Do not answer fictional characters in public.
4.Do not talk to inanimate objects in public.
5.Do not go out in public.
6.Disregard above note.Perform numbers 1 to 4.
7.Note expressions.
8.Don't die alone. Take many people with you.
9.Floor is slippery when wet.
10.Lake is slippery when dry.
11.Only talk to strangers آپ know.
12.Strangers آپ don't know are spies... Kill them all.
13.For legal purposes be sure to خارج above note.
14.Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you.
15.Kill them for security purposes.
16.Crying does not solve anything. Try violent mood swings.
17.Make a scene whenever humanly possible.
18.The men in white coats are not your friends.
19.Ask them for a room with lots of sharp, pointy objects.
20.When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket.
21.Chicken soup, although good for colds, is not the best cure for drowning.
22.Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing.
23.Unlike fine wine, دودھ does not get better with age.
24.Always remember, um... um... Damn.
25.Train army of flying monkeys.
26.Goldfish don't like milk.
27.Do not maim people. If آپ already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits.
28.Find out who invented the word "pianist".
29.People are staring at you.
30.So act insane.
31.People are weird, but not as weird as me.
32.Do not taunt animals at zoo. They have feelings... And teeth.
33.Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people.
34.Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experiance. Do this as much as possible.
35.You'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry. It's only me... Bonding.
36.Never pet a burning dog.
37.Never make eye contact with a naked man. Especially if آپ are wearing a parka.
38.Naked men dig parkas.
39.Beware the naked man who offers آپ his parka.
40.You know what would look good on you?
41.Immolated cockroaches.
42.Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug.
43.The size of Danny DeVito.
44.Making an amusing facial expression. Like this.
45.Numbers are evil. Count in clovers.
46.Stalking is fun. Do it more.
47.Make a large sign saying, "Look at me, I'm a gumnut tree!"
48.No matter what anyone says, there is a way to get to your fantasy world.
49.That way is rum.
50.Constipated people don't give a sh-t.
52.You cannot kill the snow.
53.The snow can kill you.
54.Grass can also kill you.
55.The leprechaun on the cereal box کہا I can't get his lucky charms...
56.Catch and castrate leprechaun.
57.HE is real... No matter what the men in white coats say.
58.Staple paper in the middle of the page.
59.In case of blank looks, laugh maniacally.
60.You are not haxxor l337 یا an uberhacker یا anything like that.
61.Pretend to be so around teh n00bs.
62.Do not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul sucking demon.
63.Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway?
64.Ask Senior Diablo for a bigger pitchfork.
65.Remember to kill HIM...
66.Tell the small children in Toys 'R' Us that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood.
67.Note reactions. Avoid parents.
68.The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory.
69.Scream, the doctors don't like it, they'll give آپ a shot of something nice.
70.Hide the bodies, otherwise peole ask embarressing questions.
71.Eat the evidence.
72.But not if it's broken glass.
73.When in the presence of someone much wiser than you, point in a random direction and yell, "Look, a distraction!" Then run.
74.Do not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats kids.
75.Disregard last note.
76.Note reactions.
77.On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year.
78.Stock up on ball point pens.
79.Learn to fly. Tell no one.
80.The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing.
81.Do not stick fingers into blender.
82.Blender... Bad... Ouch.
83.Blood loss is bad.
84.Find way to re-attatch fingers.
85.Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM.
86.Answer every سوال with a question.
87.Ask people what gender they are.
88.Note reactions.
89.Refer to people as "mortal".
90.The Seagull From Hell is out to get me.
91.Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible.
92.Start سے طرف کی drowning them in آگ کے, آگ ants.
93.Find the creators of pop-up messages.
94.Kill them.
95.Brutally.
96.Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination.
97.Dunk head in boiling water.
98.Disregard last note. Was written سے طرف کی Voice #7.
99.Gullible IS written on the ceiling!
100.Investigate this whole "critical mass" thing when the klaxon dies down...
added by adultswimperson
Source: Google
posted by someone_save_me
6
These are just some, مزید will probably be added later.

I hate:
-Animal abusers
-Child abusers
-Butthurt moralfags (If آپ get mad at me saying moralfags, well then, آپ must be new here. I'm not homophobic.)
-3/4 the mainstream crap on the radio
-Jersey Shore
-Homophobes
-People who don't thank آپ when آپ open a door for them
-Toddlers and Tiaras
-People who are always snooPING AS usual I see. /shot so fuckin' hard
-Fuckers who judge people سے طرف کی their appearance
-When my computer breaks down
-Fangirls who get mad at if آپ aren't borderline insanely obsessed with the same thing they are (Go on the Michael...
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added by r-pattz
Source: tumblr.
1
posted by patrisha727
4
1.1 out of every 8 couples married in the U.S. last سال met online?

2.New York City has 578 miles of waterfront?

3.In New York, at the سب, سب سے اوپر of a سکائی سکریپر, بلند ترین عمارات it is possible for people to see snow falling while people on the ground see rain?

4.Passports issued سے طرف کی the US after January 1, 2007 have always-on radio frequency identification chips?

5.Shopping is the most مقبول domestic trip activity سے طرف کی American travelers?

6.There are almost two million women veterans in the US?

7.The average American woman weighs 140 pounds?

8.The average clothing size for women in America is size 14?

9.The longest street...
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added by bubblegum_kiss
1
posted by EmzLovesCheryl
1
Hey, this is my piece for my drama exam, without the stage directions. I started writing it out on here as a way of learning it, then I thought, why no post it? I may as well, it's going to do no harm. :D
So here it is, its rather depressing though. So if آپ don't need to be depressed right now, then I suggest آپ don't read it. :)




[Give me a break. You’re going to go back to your دوستوں and either forget all about us یا tell a story about the hideous freak آپ met tonight. آپ don’t know me, if آپ did, you’d never think we’d be friends. I don’t have دوستوں - except my brother....
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Hello I'm NOT the nostalgia critic, I remembered it so آپ don't have to. I've been watching NC's biggest dumba** in distress video and I thought I'd do one. Except for me it's only going to be characters that are animated and it's not only going to be female characters, there are some male characters here too. With other characters I can find at least some aspect of heroics in them except for these characters. Please keep in mind that this is just my opinion and I don't hate all of these characters. Please comments, enjoy.

10.Esmeralda(The Hunchback of Notre Dame)

I promise I'm not being...
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added by DaegFaerchsGirl
8
posted by tokidoki123
[Everybody Loves Raymond] 116 - Diamonds #385
Marie: Oh I used to love Valentines Day!... then I met your father.
Frank: I used to love every day.
Contributed سے طرف کی funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond] 121 - Fascinating Debra #409
Debra: There's nothing funny about me to imitate y'know?
Ray: Oh, what are آپ talking about? Here I'll do you. "Ray, get off of me, it's not your birthday"
Contributed سے طرف کی funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond] 202 - Father Knows Least #380
Ray: Look, آپ have to do what Mommy says.
Ally: Why?
Ray: 'Cause I do.
Contributed سے طرف کی funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond]...
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posted by Joe1996
9
1. When آپ get pulled over, say "What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?"

2. When he asks why آپ were speeding, tell him آپ wanted to race.

3. When he talks to you, pretend آپ are deaf.

4. If he asks if آپ knew how fast آپ were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......

5. Ask if آپ can see his gun.

6. When he says آپ aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.

7. Touch him.

8. When he asks why آپ were speeding, tell him آپ had to buy a hat.

9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.

10. Refer to him سے طرف کی his first name.

11. Pretend آپ are gay and ask...
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posted by TDAPlayer158
3
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

If آپ can't drink and drive, why do آپ need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?

Do آپ need a silencer if آپ are going to shoot a mime?

Have آپ ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

If 7-11...
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A week پہلے I made an مضمون of my 20 پسندیدہ animated heroines so I thought I'd make an مضمون for my 10 least پسندیدہ animated heroines. I'm not going sugar code it, I'm going to be brutally honest because I really hate all these girls. Just so there's no confusion I wanna let آپ know that that number 10 is the one I hate the least and number one is the one I hate the most. Please leave a تبصرہ on what آپ think about this, enjoy.

10.Lady(Lady and The Tramp)

I know she's considered one of the most loved disney heroines and the most loved of all the animal heroine but I really hate...
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Okay, she's kinda getting مزید famous سے طرف کی the minute. She has her own show, her own song, and she even performed at the Disneyland Christmas دن Parade. But honestly, in MY opinion, I don't like her one bit.

I'm sorry if آپ like her cuz I kinda don't. Just now I expressed my opinon about her on Tumblr and some 12-year-old went apesh*t on me. So don't hate me guys, but I REALLY don't like her. If آپ ask me, behind her fame is a lot of money. Think about it. Auditions, professional photos, singing lessons, etc... hundreds of dollars. And who paid for it? Certainly not her. Her parents. Tens of...
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added by MeiMisty
added by MeiMisty
added by MeiMisty
added by MeiMisty
added by CokeTheUmbreon
posted by alexischaos2004
5
Hello everyone who happened to click on this, my name is Alexis, and this is Fanpop.



So, آپ may have heard about a website called DeviantART, correct? آپ probably have knowledge on what goes on there. Apparently, there's a lot of shit that goes on over there! So, in today's commentary, I'll be sharing my thoughts on this heap of fanfiction/art.


DeviantART is a large website where people all around the world can share their own works of art. آپ can also post literature and whatnot. This is a way of socializing on the internet, and this site is very popular. When there's the pros, there's always...
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