Random Club
شامل میں
Fanpop
New Post
Explore Fanpop
Here are my فہرست of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let آپ know now i got alot of these from the youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything یا eating anything آپ might spit it یا something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the جھاڑو late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the خلیج, کھاڑی they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's پسندیدہ vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the مشروم, کھنبی have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do آپ call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do آپ call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do آپ make an octopus giggle ten times?
آپ give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do آپ make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's پسندیدہ composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between آپ and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't آپ hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher کہا it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the ٹماٹر blush?
It saw the ترکاریاں, سلاد dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do آپ know if it's raining cats and dogs?
آپ step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do آپ know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do آپ get pikachu on a bus?
آپ pokémon (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't آپ dress with pikachu in the room?
He'll pikachu (peek at you)

#27 What do آپ call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
آپ boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton پار, صلیب the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do آپ call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's گلابی and fluffy?
گلابی fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
گلابی fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when آپ drink 7 coca colas?
آپ burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the مچھلی say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't آپ trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope آپ liked them. Make sure آپ check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
 PewDiePie
PewDiePie
added by tanyya
added by tanyya
added by ace2000
added by Jinx_Strangeman
added by AvatarAang97
video
added by Simmeh
Breaking Poké-Bad
video
breaking
poké-bad
The most realistic female android ever!
video
the
most
realistic
female
android
ever!
added by youknowit101
Source: trollposts@tumblr
added by nmdis
added by nmdis
added by 050801090907
added by Crazedsitcomfan
posted by Canada24
link


Sense whatsupbugs reviewed Hazbin, I thought it'll be a fun excuse to re-review Helluva Boss. Back in the day, Viv made two pilots on her channel, both set in hell. And I knew from the beginning this was the one I preferred, the sitcom styled one starring Brandon Rogers and Richard Steven Horvitz.. Yeah that's right, she has Zim..

Like Hazbin, this series is intended for adult audiences. It deals with strong language, sexual content, and violence..

Like all shows, this has both positives and negatives, though the negatives are why I'm reluctant on watching Hazbin. Sense it's the same creator,...
continue reading...
I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated سے طرف کی you.
I was so enchanted سے طرف کی your beauty that I ran into that دیوار over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.
If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime آپ passed by, just so I could stare at آپ a bit longer.
Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon.
You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire.
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
For a moment I thought I...
continue reading...
1)"Why, do آپ find me irresistible?"

2)"No, I just dress better than you"

3)"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

4)"I love the سیکنڈ grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl says you're gay, and آپ actually are, I find the best burn is: "At least I can get a boyfriend."

5)Look them in the face with a deadpan expression. Simply say, "Yes. I'm gay," and walk away. Take their thunder away. It's such a juvenile thing to say in the first place.
Or...
continue reading...
1. Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.

2. He was as tall as a 6′3″ tree.

3. Her face was a perfect oval, like a دائرے, حلقہ that had its two sides gently compressed سے طرف کی a Thigh Master.

4. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

5. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

6. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

7. The ballerina...
continue reading...
1. Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with مزید than 5 guys..you're a HOE)

2. "Hey, are آپ busy?" یا "Are آپ doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

3... Guys may be flirting around all دن but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

5. Guys go crazy over a girl's...
continue reading...