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(Just a heads up for anyone who doesn't take nicely to curse words, they دکھائیں up in this article. So, viewer discretion advised. Though it is discernibly less profane than most of my other work.)

Hidelly ho, neighborinos! Surprise surprise, I'm not actually dead.

Well, at least not yet anyway. Have I jinxed myself before this مضمون has even started...?

Quite possibly, Jared. آپ fucking idiot.

Anyway, since I've got some ideas and motivation up my sleeve, I decided to write a song for ya'll. I'm sure the عنوان alone will win myself a million Grammies.

And when I say that, I'm not referring to those evil grandmothers from Cookie Clicker. That'd be absolutely goddamn ridiculous.

Regardless though, I don't write often anymore, so let's make this one count. KICK IT!

*Insert Overly Melodramatic Piano Here*

♫Sometimes آپ feel useless...♫
♫Like a screen door on a submarine, if ya know what I mean, I'm talking anger, depression, sadness...♫
♫While every other motherfucker's feelin' some bliss!♫

♫Because my name is Deathding and I'm here to say-♫
♫"Because my name is Deathding and I'm here to say!"♫

♫Stop treating me like a child, a bother یا a prick!
♫Or else I'll have آپ all suck my-
Thesaurus.....♫

*More Sad Piano For Ya'll*

♫So I got ہوم from school, slept a bit and shot a cannon♫
♫Watched some Kanon, but the میں تپ, تپ was never canon♫
♫I got up from my sheets, and to my dismay♫
♫I felt my sadness rise as I gazed down the drivewaaaay♫

♫But little did I know that some hope would arise♫
♫My weirdness someday would pay off in my eyes♫
♫Because my name is Deathding and I'm here to say-♫
♫My sexuality's a double entendre 'cause it goes both waaays...♫

♫'Cause it's a play on words, play on words!♫
♫So stop and take a look back and interpret what آپ heard♫
♫And even though our vernacular ain't so spectacular♫
♫I'm still droppin' rhymes like my vocab was oracular!♫

(Even though it's not.)

*Play That Sad Piano*

♫While I was at school, I practiced coding in Brackets♫
♫Keying out some brackets as I typed a tourney bracket♫
♫But like life itself, there's no way آپ can hack it♫
♫Just gotta mash buttons and proofread your homework packets♫

♫But fear not, and wipe those tears away!♫
♫Because you're bound to get fucked if your days are gray♫
♫Or is it spelled grey? In the UK, that's what they say♫
♫And while I'm rhymin' sublime, on a dime, to pass the time♫
♫Nobody will notice that I'm not straight یا gay...♫
♫'Cause todaaaayyy....♫

♫Yeah it's a play on words, play on words!♫
♫So stop and take a look back and interpret what آپ heard♫
♫And even though our vernacular ain't so spectacular♫
♫I'm still droppin' rhymes like my name was Mick Jagger!♫

♫Even though it's not!♫

♫Yeaaahhhh! Oh yeah!♫

*More Epic Piano Solo Goodness*

♫This is the part of the song♫
♫Where everything slows down, and time adjusts to a screeching haaaaalt....♫

♫How can that go wrong?♫
♫Killing some time سے طرف کی beating up a clock just to pass the tiiiiiiime♫


Wait, that doesn't rhyme...

♫Now that's not very sublime♫
♫Stopping the flow just to please the proletariat kind♫
♫Mind, don't mind, but it's all in your mind♫
♫Still dropping bars left and right like my fate was intertwined, refined, designed سے طرف کی all of humankiiiiiind....♫

♫Yeah I'm sure آپ know what's coming up in kiiiiind.....♫

♫Now I'm just screwing with words, screwing with words!♫
♫So stop and take a look back and interpret what آپ heard♫
♫And even though our vernacular ain't so spectacular♫
♫I'm still dropping bars with the sharpness of a daggeeeeeer!♫

♫Nagging on and oooooooooon!♫

♫Yeeeaaaahhhh!♫


(Take my life.)
 An original dumbass melody written سے طرف کی Deathding in 2018.
An original dumbass melody written by Deathding in 2018.
Are there even true friendship until now?
سے طرف کی Secret Irken Invader Eve

Friendship. It is a word that is ALMOST a myth.

Friendship starts with a friend.
A friend gives آپ happiness and loyalty.
A friend is meant to make a promise.
A promise which is that he یا she will never turn his یا her back on you...... یا betray you.

But that friend suddenly breaks that promise.
Turns its back on آپ and stick its self to greed.

آپ cannot trust so much in this type of timeline.
آپ can never again.

He/she will leave آپ disappointed and let آپ down.

Why should آپ look for someone else like He is not enough.
He who created you,
Loved you,
Cared for you.

Why look for somebody else
When آپ have God with his love all wrapped around you.
Name something a blind person might use - A sword

Name a song with moon in the عنوان - Blue suede moon

Name a bird with a long neck - Naomi Campbell

Name an occupation where آپ need a torch - A burglar

Name a dangerous race - The Arabs

Name an item of clothing worn سے طرف کی the 3 musketeers - A horse

Name something that floats in the bath - Water

Name something آپ wear on the ساحل سمندر, بیچ - A deckchair

Name something Red - My cardigan

Name a famous cowboy - Buck Rogers

A number آپ have to memorize - 7

Something آپ do before going to بستر - Sleep

Something آپ put on walls - Roofs

Something in the garden that's green...
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The End Of Everything, The End Of Apolla
Song-Fic. Song: Lights سے طرف کی Ellie Goulding, The BassNectar Remix


Late in the evening, around 9:30 p.m., 12 سال old Apolla Falconer awoke with a start. Everything around her was pitch black, all except from the مالٹا, نارنگی سٹریٹ, گلی lights, who's beams came faintly through the blinded windows. Apolla quickly raised her head from the cold, sticky surface it was on. With her incredible night- vision, she found out that the surface was a ڈیسک from her school. Apolla looked around even مزید and saw that she was in her own classroom, in fact. "Why the 'ell am I in...
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posted by xboxrocksx45
آپ just shut the door i fell like مزید when آپ say i'm shy i cry saying why? why? do آپ make sure to love me even though i'm shy do آپ ever ever ever think to try? do آپ think of me? when آپ say shy shy shy i say why and i'll sit and think about waiting when آپ say hi well than آپ won't be mine! yes this is love but does it hurt? when i cry? when آپ say shy and i know it's true but i'm alright i and i love you! why would say means things why would آپ say the stuff that stings why would آپ say that word when i know آپ much? i don't think i would be with آپ if i knew a thing یا two about your life آپ backstabbing چھری i trusted آپ and yet آپ still flew without me
posted by icuSTALKER
She's beautiful...
Her brown eyes sparkle.
Her nails are perfect.
Her golden brown hair shines like polished wood.
She is an average height for twenty-one.
She's playful, friendly.
She never gets mad.
She loves food.
She hugs آپ a lot.
Don't آپ love her?
I do...
I love my dog.
:D:D:D:D:D:D
posted by adaug
آپ can only live once, but if آپ do it right, once is enough. -Mae West.
I didn't believe that the first time I heard it,but one tiny mistake,can change your live...Forever.
April 19,1999.
The clock read 7:43,I got out of bed.I was late for school.When I left,I didn't say bye to mom یا dad.I just left.On the way there,I remembered a physics test I had to take,and if I failed it,I got an F in physics!So,at my lunch hour,I went to the library.I saw my two دوستوں already studying.I went over there and we started laughing and talking,but the librarian told us to be quiet.Then she went in the hall.Then...
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"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!",a teen named Tessa screamed as she was falling down a hole.

Everyone gasped.

"NO!!!",her friend Dana yelled

"Tessa!",another friend,Martha shouted."No!No!No!No!No!No!!You still owe me 50 bucks,man!"

"That darn lady,she چرا لیا, چوری کی our money,man!",a cowboy said."What a shame"

"No..", a girl named Erica whispered.

"Oh my god!",cowboy said

Everyone sobbed."All that money!", a lady named Lisa wailed."No!!!!!!!"

"The money is gone,man!",Lisa's sister Sara whined.

The cowboy sighed.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!",Martha screamed."MY MONEY!!!!!!!!!!"
Bunker bustin' mega ultra super, ahh ahhh! Holy crap, ahh!
Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! K.O.!

One-up, power up, already leveled up
Options set to difficult, love a challenge, typical
Raging through my enemies, kicking پچھواڑے, گدا so happily
Supernova, bend آپ over, to the lava! game over!

I'm saying "Yay!" when I'm knocking آپ right off the stage,
B*tches hate but I don't play, smash a Goomba any day!
I'm on a mission, trying to save the princess!
Dashing, smashing, knock آپ outta commission!

I'm a killer like a Manson, you're blowin' like you're Hanson,
Your powers are weak when آپ go against me,
You...
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posted by MissChicky97
User: I'm the Doctor. I'm a timelord from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Kasterborous. I'm 903 years old, and I'm the man who's gonna save your lives and all six billion people below.

Cleverbot: No you're not. You're saying random stock phrases which have no relevance whatsoever to what I say to you.

User: What? WHAT? WHAT?!?!?!

Cleverbot: How is you?

User: I'm trying to save the world and the TARDIS pulled up some random application.

Cleverbot: That is impossible. آپ have no means to do so. آپ cannot feel emotion.

User: OI! I can feel emotions. I'm not completely alien آپ know!!...
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It was Thursday.10:07 a.m.I got out of my bed,and went down for breakfast."Yeah,okay.Yes,yes I understand.Thanks for calling."Mom کہا and hung up the phone."Hi honey."She greeted."I'll be right back."Mom left the kitchen.I picked up my napkin when.CLING!I saw Alicia and Henry in my kitchen!"What the-Why did آپ do that?"I asked."You need to come to the درخت house!"Alicia demanded.
"The what?"I asked.
Henry and Alicia gasped.
"Get dressed and hurry!"Alicia demanded.
I ran to my room.I think I remembered the درخت house.I remember Maybelle.I remembered Ariana.I didn't quite remember the درخت house.I...
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posted by hetaliaitaly
One fine دن in the middle of the night two dead me got u to fight back to back they faced

eachother drew there swords and shot eachother

the deff policeman heard the noise and came to arrest thoughs two young boys if u dont believe me u know its true ask the blind man he saw to.


(i like that thing یا whatever u call it lalalalalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa im only puting this part because the مضمون is not long enough and blahblahblah and all that stuff and stuff and oh my god how long does it need to be)
posted by tokidoki123
There's a place in my mind
No one knows where it hides
And my fantasy is flying
It's a قلعہ in the sky

It's a world of our past
Where the legend still lasts
And the king wears the crown
But the magic spell is law

Take your sword and your shield
There's a battle on the field
You're a knight and you're right
So with dragons now you'll fight

And my fancy is flying
It's a قلعہ in the sky
یا there's nothing out there
These are castles in the air

Fairytales live in me
Fables coming from my memory
Fantasy is not a crime
Find your قلعہ in the sky

You've got the key
Of the kingdom of the clouds
Open the door
Leaving back your doubts

You've got the power
To live another childhood
So ride the wind
That leads آپ to the moon 'cause..."
11 year-old Sarah sat in her room.Brown hair.Blue eyes.And black boots."Sarah!Alicia is here!"Mom yelled."Bring her in!"Sarah said."Hey!"Alicia greeted."Ya ready?"She asked."Almost."She snapped the lid on her marker.Alicia whistled."Wo-ow!That's amazing!"She said.Admiring a Drawing of the fat words spelling out "Live.Love.Hope."."Come on!We're late!"Both girls ran outside."Bye mom!"Sarah کہا bounding out the door.The girls met 12 سال old Henry at a پیکن, پیکان tree."Hey!Step aside!I'll open it!"Sarah said,pushing Henry aside so she could put in the combination."Okay!Come up."Sarah کہا opening...
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posted by amy36y
nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan
1. they will sing his songs

2.they will blush when they here somone say his name یا talk about one of his new songs

3.they will have atleast one picture of him

4.gets upset if they cant go to one of his concerts

5. wont be afraid to say hes cool

6.listens to his موسیقی every night to go to sleep with

7.will ask آپ if آپ have heard his new song

8.screams if someone else says i love justin beiber

9.is always talking about a video they watched of him on youtube

10.will say they hate یا love whatever he does even if they hate it یا love it
I'm stupid.I'm 18 and I'm STILL afraid of tooth fairies.....my cousin(Not ANDY!),Edricle(Ed-ric.cle) use to tell me funny nonsense until one دن he came up with this idea the scare me.THE TOOOOOOOOOOTH FAIRY!!!One دن when I was watching the TV,he came up to me and said"hey,do u know why do tooth fairies take yr teeth?" I asked"why?"so he said"They take yr teeth and use super glue and glue them together to make dentures for OLD PEOPLE!!!" that kinda freaked me out and whenever I loose a teeth,I'll burry it in the ground at the backyard where my dad does his planting.That's when my dad found...
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There once was a girl named,Josie,Josie had black hair,she was a cop,she was 'bout 19,"Mom!!!WHERES MY PHONE?"Said Josie
"I DON'T KNOW!"Her mom said."FINE!I'll just go to my friend's apartment!WITHOUT CALLING!"Josie argued.
Josie drove to her friend's apartment."Kate!"She saw her friend lay dead on the سوفی, لٹانا with blood running down her face."OH MY GOD!HELP!!!!!911!"
- - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - --- - ---
1 ماہ later,Josie tried to find out who killed her best friend.She later found out that she had a sister that was murdered in 1989.Her mom was dating a detective,So he helped her ."Okay,It...
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The start and the only chapter: "Oh my god there's a sale on MINISKIRTS Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!" "Envy just SHUT UP!!!! آپ are a GUY NOT A GIRL!!!!" Lust yells at Envy as he stares at the miniskirt sale sign. "Hey آپ bums want simethin یا are آپ goin to keep starin in my store like a couple of freaks?" "Uh I guess that we can look around." "Come on Lust there is a sale on MINISKIRTS here lets go in and buy some MINISKIRTS!!!!!!!!!" Lust just groans as Envy dragged her in the store. "Um Lust?" "Yeah?" "Why is the Fullmetal Pipsqueak here?" "WHAT?!" "That voice, is that Envy and Lust? Al do آپ hear...
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posted by lupichkata
Sorry, if it's too short, but that's all i could think of.
1. Go to him and say "I know what آپ did last summer and i'll tell Ron." and see what his reaction is.
2. Poke him with a wand یا a stick and when he turns around, pretend it wasn't you.
3. Tell him he has his mother's eyes and his father's package.
4. Laugh hysterically every time he walks in front of آپ and when he asks why whisper "I've read your diary." then run away. Still laughing hysterically.
5. Ask him how his parents are.
6. Ask him if Dumbledore has proposed yet.
7. Write an erotic story about Snape and Harry's mom and read it...
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posted by karpach_14
A group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only." Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in.

The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have 5 floors. Go up floor سے طرف کی floor, and once آپ find what آپ are looking for, آپ can stay there. It's easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling آپ what's inside."

So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads: "All the men on this floor are short and plain." The دوستوں laugh and without hesitation اقدام on to...
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