1. Unplug the refrigerator.
2. Turn the تندور on.
3. Rearrange the furniture. (Turn a bedroom into a dining room, and vice versa.)
4. Hide the remote.
5. Hide the television.
6. Hide the pets.
7. Change the answering machine message.
8. Turn off the answering machine.
9. Change the speed dial numbers.
10. Change the alarm clock time to twelve hours earlier.
11. Add an extra goldfish to the goldfish bowl.
12. Leave a condom wrapper under a sofa cushion.
13. Make yourself a meal. Be polite and wash the dishes.
14. See how much pay-per-view porn آپ can order in one day.
15. Set the TiVo to record nothing but infomercials.
16. Leave a note on their computer that says "Thanks for the files."
17. Leave a note anywhere that says "I'll be back."
18. Leave a note listing a website address. Set up a website and post a تصویر of yourself sitting on their toilet. (Don't forget to wear a ski mask.)
19. Replace a crucifix with Mickey Mouse.
20. Install video surveillance equipment. Leave a tape of yourself installing it.
21. Paint "Helter Skelter" on a wall.
22. Replace دیوار تصاویر with تصاویر of someone else's family.
23. Replace products with similar products of a different brand. If they own Heinz ketchup, replace it with Hunt's. If they own Tide laundry detergent, replace it with All.
24. Tie a nylon string across each doorway at shin level.
25. Paint their bathrooms black.
26. Paint their mirrors black.
27. Paint their windows black.
28. Nail their windows shut.
29. Put a skeleton in a closet.
30. Stuff a تکیا with live crickets. (Available at your local pet store.)
31. Hang dead things from the ceiling.
32. Wrap a miscellaneous animal organ in aluminum foil and leave it in the freezer.
33. Empty the sugar container and replace it with Sweet & Low.
34. Fill every glass in the باورچی خانے, باورچی خانہ cabinet with water. (They might not spill the سیکنڈ یا third glasses, but fill them all anyway.)
35. Turn off the phone ringers.
36. Leave the stereo, alarm clock, and ویژن ٹیلی volume set to maximum.
37. Exchange the contents of two clothing drawers.
38. Grease the banisters.
39. Leave counterfeit paw prints up a wall, ending at a ceiling vent.
40. Put a rubber اچار in the اچار jar. Replace the jar's label with a label identical in every way except for the phone number for complaints. (I could tell آپ what phone number to include, but why don't آپ figure it out?)
41. Call for food delivery. Repeat two dozen times quickly before leaving.
42. Make urine ice cubes.
43. Pee in the shampoo.
44. Take the book jackets off the hardcover کتابیں and put them around multiple copies of the same cheap book آپ purchased previously at a dollar store. If آپ can get copies of a book with blank pages, even better.
45. Unscrew the light bulbs.
46. Hide the toilet paper.
47. Put their possessions into piles based on color.
48. Make a bathtub full of iced tea.
49. Bring in a small, battery-powered recording device. Turn it on and play a looping recording of a young girl whispering, "Jesus is coming." Unscrew a ceiling vent and throw it in as far as آپ can.
50. Plant weeds in the flowerpots.
By: Jason Roth
2. Turn the تندور on.
3. Rearrange the furniture. (Turn a bedroom into a dining room, and vice versa.)
4. Hide the remote.
5. Hide the television.
6. Hide the pets.
7. Change the answering machine message.
8. Turn off the answering machine.
9. Change the speed dial numbers.
10. Change the alarm clock time to twelve hours earlier.
11. Add an extra goldfish to the goldfish bowl.
12. Leave a condom wrapper under a sofa cushion.
13. Make yourself a meal. Be polite and wash the dishes.
14. See how much pay-per-view porn آپ can order in one day.
15. Set the TiVo to record nothing but infomercials.
16. Leave a note on their computer that says "Thanks for the files."
17. Leave a note anywhere that says "I'll be back."
18. Leave a note listing a website address. Set up a website and post a تصویر of yourself sitting on their toilet. (Don't forget to wear a ski mask.)
19. Replace a crucifix with Mickey Mouse.
20. Install video surveillance equipment. Leave a tape of yourself installing it.
21. Paint "Helter Skelter" on a wall.
22. Replace دیوار تصاویر with تصاویر of someone else's family.
23. Replace products with similar products of a different brand. If they own Heinz ketchup, replace it with Hunt's. If they own Tide laundry detergent, replace it with All.
24. Tie a nylon string across each doorway at shin level.
25. Paint their bathrooms black.
26. Paint their mirrors black.
27. Paint their windows black.
28. Nail their windows shut.
29. Put a skeleton in a closet.
30. Stuff a تکیا with live crickets. (Available at your local pet store.)
31. Hang dead things from the ceiling.
32. Wrap a miscellaneous animal organ in aluminum foil and leave it in the freezer.
33. Empty the sugar container and replace it with Sweet & Low.
34. Fill every glass in the باورچی خانے, باورچی خانہ cabinet with water. (They might not spill the سیکنڈ یا third glasses, but fill them all anyway.)
35. Turn off the phone ringers.
36. Leave the stereo, alarm clock, and ویژن ٹیلی volume set to maximum.
37. Exchange the contents of two clothing drawers.
38. Grease the banisters.
39. Leave counterfeit paw prints up a wall, ending at a ceiling vent.
40. Put a rubber اچار in the اچار jar. Replace the jar's label with a label identical in every way except for the phone number for complaints. (I could tell آپ what phone number to include, but why don't آپ figure it out?)
41. Call for food delivery. Repeat two dozen times quickly before leaving.
42. Make urine ice cubes.
43. Pee in the shampoo.
44. Take the book jackets off the hardcover کتابیں and put them around multiple copies of the same cheap book آپ purchased previously at a dollar store. If آپ can get copies of a book with blank pages, even better.
45. Unscrew the light bulbs.
46. Hide the toilet paper.
47. Put their possessions into piles based on color.
48. Make a bathtub full of iced tea.
49. Bring in a small, battery-powered recording device. Turn it on and play a looping recording of a young girl whispering, "Jesus is coming." Unscrew a ceiling vent and throw it in as far as آپ can.
50. Plant weeds in the flowerpots.
By: Jason Roth
Something Beautiful
I was in a restless mood.
I tried to read and ended up with کتابیں scattered all over the floor.
I tried listening to موسیقی but all the words sounded out of tune.
I tried to write but ended up staring at a blank page for ten minutes.
So I decided to create something beautiful.
I wrote a song, drew a picture, and made a frame for it.
I took a photo, made a vase, and arranged some flowers.
I drew a tattoo on my hand, made a tower out of everything, climbed on my roof and did a dance.
But no matter how hard I try the most beautiful thing I ever created will always be you.
I was in a restless mood.
I tried to read and ended up with کتابیں scattered all over the floor.
I tried listening to موسیقی but all the words sounded out of tune.
I tried to write but ended up staring at a blank page for ten minutes.
So I decided to create something beautiful.
I wrote a song, drew a picture, and made a frame for it.
I took a photo, made a vase, and arranged some flowers.
I drew a tattoo on my hand, made a tower out of everything, climbed on my roof and did a dance.
But no matter how hard I try the most beautiful thing I ever created will always be you.
It's best if آپ say your opinion
Xbox 360 یا ps3? (Xbox)
Twilight یا Harry Potter? (duh Harry Potter)
Is metal good music? (Of course it is!)
What do آپ think of Justin Beiber? یا One Direction? or... um... The Jonas Brothers? (They all suck)
Nintendo یا Sega? (Niiiinnteendooo)
Should gays have rights? (NEVER!)
Should cannabis be legalized? (No Doubt)
Should America have better gun control? (yes)
Should animals have rights? (yep)
Halo یا COD? (Halo)
Is pokemon childish? (no)
Facebook یا twitter? (Facebook)
AND NOW THE ULTIMATE WAY TO START ARGUMENTS ONLINE:
سٹار, ستارہ wars یا trek which is better? (STAR WARS!)
Xbox 360 یا ps3? (Xbox)
Twilight یا Harry Potter? (duh Harry Potter)
Is metal good music? (Of course it is!)
What do آپ think of Justin Beiber? یا One Direction? or... um... The Jonas Brothers? (They all suck)
Nintendo یا Sega? (Niiiinnteendooo)
Should gays have rights? (NEVER!)
Should cannabis be legalized? (No Doubt)
Should America have better gun control? (yes)
Should animals have rights? (yep)
Halo یا COD? (Halo)
Is pokemon childish? (no)
Facebook یا twitter? (Facebook)
AND NOW THE ULTIMATE WAY TO START ARGUMENTS ONLINE:
سٹار, ستارہ wars یا trek which is better? (STAR WARS!)
My fuckin Little ٹٹو be a funky-ass brand of plastic ponies produced since 1983 سے طرف کی tha toy manufacturer Hasbro. Marketed primarily ta hoes, tha ponies feature colorful bodies n' manes n' a unique symbol on one and both sidez of they flanks, referred ta up in tha two most حالیہ generations as "cutie marks". My fuckin lil ٹٹو was again revamped up in tha mid-2000z wit freshly smoked up n' mo' modern looks ta appeal ta a whole freshly smoked up market.
Followin tha original gangsta My fuckin Pretty ٹٹو toy, introduced up in 1981, My fuckin Little ٹٹو was launched up in 1983 n' tha line became ghettofab durin tha 1980s. Da original gangsta toy line ran from 1983 ta 1995 (1992 up in tha US), n' inspired animated specials, a animated feature length film n' three animated televizzle series.
Da toy line had a lata release up in Japan, سے طرف کی Takara up in tha '80s durin Generation 1, n' سے طرف کی Takara Tomy up in 2006 fo' a period of time.
Followin tha original gangsta My fuckin Pretty ٹٹو toy, introduced up in 1981, My fuckin Little ٹٹو was launched up in 1983 n' tha line became ghettofab durin tha 1980s. Da original gangsta toy line ran from 1983 ta 1995 (1992 up in tha US), n' inspired animated specials, a animated feature length film n' three animated televizzle series.
Da toy line had a lata release up in Japan, سے طرف کی Takara up in tha '80s durin Generation 1, n' سے طرف کی Takara Tomy up in 2006 fo' a period of time.
A blinding flash of white light
Lit up the sky over Gaza tonight
People running for cover
Not knowing whether they're dead یا alive
They came with their tanks and their planes
With ravaging fiery flames
And nothing remains
Just a voice rising up in the smoky haze
We will not go down
In the night, without a fight
آپ can burn up our mosques and our homes and our schools
But our spirit will never die
We will not go down
In Gaza tonight
Women and children alike
Murdered and massacred night after night
While the so-called leaders of countries afar
Debated on who's wrong یا right
But their powerless words were in vain
And the bombs fell down like acid rain
But through the tears and the blood and the pain
آپ can still hear that voice through the smoky haze
We will not go down
In the night, without a fight
آپ can burn up our mosques and our homes and our schools
But our spirit will never die
We will not go down
In Gaza tonight
Lit up the sky over Gaza tonight
People running for cover
Not knowing whether they're dead یا alive
They came with their tanks and their planes
With ravaging fiery flames
And nothing remains
Just a voice rising up in the smoky haze
We will not go down
In the night, without a fight
آپ can burn up our mosques and our homes and our schools
But our spirit will never die
We will not go down
In Gaza tonight
Women and children alike
Murdered and massacred night after night
While the so-called leaders of countries afar
Debated on who's wrong یا right
But their powerless words were in vain
And the bombs fell down like acid rain
But through the tears and the blood and the pain
آپ can still hear that voice through the smoky haze
We will not go down
In the night, without a fight
آپ can burn up our mosques and our homes and our schools
But our spirit will never die
We will not go down
In Gaza tonight
Hi peeps, I just had an idea so I made a spur of the moment article!!!
So, what you've gotta do is write a single word in the تبصرہ box (make sure it's relevant to the one above it!) and eventually it will make a story!!!
E.g:
There
Once
Was
A
Carrot
Called
Bill!
Get it? Ok, the starting word is...
Who
Ghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghhghg
Just filling up space so the مضمون will ACTUALLY POST HOW LONG DOES THIS THING HAVE TO BE?!?!?
.."........."....."...."........
So, what you've gotta do is write a single word in the تبصرہ box (make sure it's relevant to the one above it!) and eventually it will make a story!!!
E.g:
There
Once
Was
A
Carrot
Called
Bill!
Get it? Ok, the starting word is...
Who
Ghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghhghg
Just filling up space so the مضمون will ACTUALLY POST HOW LONG DOES THIS THING HAVE TO BE?!?!?
.."........."....."...."........