1. At the airport, wear a uniform and claim آپ are the pilot, get annoyed if they don't believe آپ but DONT give up, see how far آپ can get ( WARNING, may result in آپ being arrested)
2. Whilst boarding the plane, say in a loud voice "THAT WING SURE DOES LOOK RUSTY!!"
3. When everyone is seated, do your own demonstration of what to do in an emergency, let this include 'comical' situations such as "in the (likely) event of the plane setting alight and becoming a plummeting fireball of death, please remember to tighten your seatbelt" look surprised when آپ are the only one laughing.