Note:In the HPvsT spot, a lot of us went around and shared our "anti-Twilight" stories. I found mine to be a very cathartic and relaxing write. It got me thinking: how would I feel if I shared a "my story" thing about something I'm even more passionate about? So, I thought I'd share my "Journey into the Severus Snape fandom" story :) And, to be honest, I feel even better than I did when I wrote my slightly humorous anti story.
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So, the Harry Potter series is winding down to an official close. There will be no مزید فلمیں and, as of yet, no مزید books. It's a bitter-sweet thought. Harry and co. have had a long, amazing journey and have deserved the epic ending they are about to receive.
I really can't stop thinking about how I got into this amazing journey and how I became enamored (and head over heels) with the character Severus. While I love him for everything that he is (and everything that he isn't) my initial reason for my feelings becoming so strong for this man, upon reflection, is مزید his figurative supportive role in my life.
I got my first Harry Potter book when I was nine years old, on my birthday. At that time, I was reading anything I could get my hands on, and I didn't even think twice about cracking the spine and diving right in. I wasn't impressed with the first chapter, but my friend (who'd also read the first book) encouraged me and, so, I continued on. سے طرف کی the time Harry boarded the Hogwarts Express, I was hooked.
The series, as it grew, quickly became my escape. My parents (and entire family) fought about everything constantly. The wizarding world, the train, and Hogwarts were ready and waiting for me to abandon this world filled with screaming, name-calling, accusations, and low-blows. Dumbledore was always at the feast, ready for his warm welcome. Harry was always excited to head out, Hermione had all the answers, and Severus wasted no time in being the biggest پچھواڑے, گدا of them all. Severus refused to be bowed سے طرف کی tears and whining and I, being completely smitten with him, refused to do anything that would make him turn up his nose. He was my inspiration for being strong, as crazy as that sounds.
I suppose that's really why he's my پسندیدہ character – I can relate so much مزید to him than anyone. He kept people at a distance, never wanting to دکھائیں his true heart, lest it be shattered into pieces. He stayed strong throughout; there were so many times when he could have walked away, could have broken down, refused. But he didn't. I didn't either.
سے طرف کی the time the fifth book came about, the similarities between Severus and myself (and Harry and myself) were eerie. The image of his parents fighting, while he cried – unseen – in the background literally had me closing the book with shaking hands. Harry being ostracized for “lying” made me warm to him – he, like Severus, had stayed strong. I was ostracized for “lying” as well. I had lost almost every friend I had (I was thirteen at the time) except one. And, again, the world was there for me. I, along with Harry, battled to get the truth out. I wasn't alone, and I was comforted سے طرف کی that.
When I was fifteen, I was diagnosed with Celiac (an allergy to wheat and glutton). It's a pretty scary disease, actually: if not controlled, it can (and will kill you) سے طرف کی destroying your organs (my uncle and my father both almost lost their livers and my grandfather died from it). It was scary and uncomfortable. Imagine a fifteen سال old, surrounded سے طرف کی دوستوں at a birthday party, unable to partake in dinner, یا cake, یا ice-cream (and yes, here in America, quite a few ice-creams have wheat and/or glutton) in it and forced to watch everyone around her eating happily; spending the night at a دوستوں house and having to have their دوستوں make آپ a “special” رات کے کھانے, شام کا کھانا and breakfast; needing to take food to band camp and having to make it yourself with no help, despite exhaustion, and a time limit. And Harry Potter was there: Severus had killed Dumbledore. I knew that there was مزید to it, but it served to distract me from the misery that was calling itself my life. Besides, he'd been there for me: how could I not believe that he wasn't the “evil” guy many شائقین painted him to be?
What Severus was going through was a lot worse than what I was, and if he could stand strong and not break after “supposedly” (yes, admittedly, I was one of the ones who thought Dumby wasn't really dead) killing Dumbledore -the only one who really trusted him - than I could stand strong while battling off the isolation and embarrassment I felt around my friends.
People often call me کڑوا, تلخ and, I suppose, I am in a way. Having this allergy isn't like having an allergy to peanuts, where I can just ignore مونگفلی, مونگ پھلی مکھن and be good. Here in America, the wheat/glutton is in everything – from most ketchup, meat, and even some french fries. I battle with weight (I can't really get calories from my food) and various other health issues due to finding out about this disease so late in life (imagine the damage my kidneys, stomach, liver, and esophagus have after fifteen years of ingesting something it was allergic to). My دوستوں and family (unless they had it themselves as well) never understood, sympathized, یا even tried to be supportive یا helpful. And through it all, Harry Potter was there, weaving magic, battling villains, and strolling through the magical قلعہ at midnight to hand over a dragon. There was normal, human drama, and drama that made me realize that what I was going through wasn't that bad.
And there was Severus – snarky as ever, with similarities to me and my own past – standing strong and encouraging me to do the same.
I'm not going to lie – sometimes I think I'm crazy for loving a fictional character. But آپ know what? I've come to the conclusion that I don't really much care. My “crazy-ness” helped me through the darkest times of my life. I'm glad to be crazy.
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So, the Harry Potter series is winding down to an official close. There will be no مزید فلمیں and, as of yet, no مزید books. It's a bitter-sweet thought. Harry and co. have had a long, amazing journey and have deserved the epic ending they are about to receive.
I really can't stop thinking about how I got into this amazing journey and how I became enamored (and head over heels) with the character Severus. While I love him for everything that he is (and everything that he isn't) my initial reason for my feelings becoming so strong for this man, upon reflection, is مزید his figurative supportive role in my life.
I got my first Harry Potter book when I was nine years old, on my birthday. At that time, I was reading anything I could get my hands on, and I didn't even think twice about cracking the spine and diving right in. I wasn't impressed with the first chapter, but my friend (who'd also read the first book) encouraged me and, so, I continued on. سے طرف کی the time Harry boarded the Hogwarts Express, I was hooked.
The series, as it grew, quickly became my escape. My parents (and entire family) fought about everything constantly. The wizarding world, the train, and Hogwarts were ready and waiting for me to abandon this world filled with screaming, name-calling, accusations, and low-blows. Dumbledore was always at the feast, ready for his warm welcome. Harry was always excited to head out, Hermione had all the answers, and Severus wasted no time in being the biggest پچھواڑے, گدا of them all. Severus refused to be bowed سے طرف کی tears and whining and I, being completely smitten with him, refused to do anything that would make him turn up his nose. He was my inspiration for being strong, as crazy as that sounds.
I suppose that's really why he's my پسندیدہ character – I can relate so much مزید to him than anyone. He kept people at a distance, never wanting to دکھائیں his true heart, lest it be shattered into pieces. He stayed strong throughout; there were so many times when he could have walked away, could have broken down, refused. But he didn't. I didn't either.
سے طرف کی the time the fifth book came about, the similarities between Severus and myself (and Harry and myself) were eerie. The image of his parents fighting, while he cried – unseen – in the background literally had me closing the book with shaking hands. Harry being ostracized for “lying” made me warm to him – he, like Severus, had stayed strong. I was ostracized for “lying” as well. I had lost almost every friend I had (I was thirteen at the time) except one. And, again, the world was there for me. I, along with Harry, battled to get the truth out. I wasn't alone, and I was comforted سے طرف کی that.
When I was fifteen, I was diagnosed with Celiac (an allergy to wheat and glutton). It's a pretty scary disease, actually: if not controlled, it can (and will kill you) سے طرف کی destroying your organs (my uncle and my father both almost lost their livers and my grandfather died from it). It was scary and uncomfortable. Imagine a fifteen سال old, surrounded سے طرف کی دوستوں at a birthday party, unable to partake in dinner, یا cake, یا ice-cream (and yes, here in America, quite a few ice-creams have wheat and/or glutton) in it and forced to watch everyone around her eating happily; spending the night at a دوستوں house and having to have their دوستوں make آپ a “special” رات کے کھانے, شام کا کھانا and breakfast; needing to take food to band camp and having to make it yourself with no help, despite exhaustion, and a time limit. And Harry Potter was there: Severus had killed Dumbledore. I knew that there was مزید to it, but it served to distract me from the misery that was calling itself my life. Besides, he'd been there for me: how could I not believe that he wasn't the “evil” guy many شائقین painted him to be?
What Severus was going through was a lot worse than what I was, and if he could stand strong and not break after “supposedly” (yes, admittedly, I was one of the ones who thought Dumby wasn't really dead) killing Dumbledore -the only one who really trusted him - than I could stand strong while battling off the isolation and embarrassment I felt around my friends.
People often call me کڑوا, تلخ and, I suppose, I am in a way. Having this allergy isn't like having an allergy to peanuts, where I can just ignore مونگفلی, مونگ پھلی مکھن and be good. Here in America, the wheat/glutton is in everything – from most ketchup, meat, and even some french fries. I battle with weight (I can't really get calories from my food) and various other health issues due to finding out about this disease so late in life (imagine the damage my kidneys, stomach, liver, and esophagus have after fifteen years of ingesting something it was allergic to). My دوستوں and family (unless they had it themselves as well) never understood, sympathized, یا even tried to be supportive یا helpful. And through it all, Harry Potter was there, weaving magic, battling villains, and strolling through the magical قلعہ at midnight to hand over a dragon. There was normal, human drama, and drama that made me realize that what I was going through wasn't that bad.
And there was Severus – snarky as ever, with similarities to me and my own past – standing strong and encouraging me to do the same.
I'm not going to lie – sometimes I think I'm crazy for loving a fictional character. But آپ know what? I've come to the conclusion that I don't really much care. My “crazy-ness” helped me through the darkest times of my life. I'm glad to be crazy.