Help me please?? This is the first time i've put my stuff up here...

Ok, first آپ should know that آپ probably wont hear the اگلے part of this. Sorry =S
Second, before آپ start on my spelling, grammar etc etc, آپ MUST tell me if آپ get it then آپ can have a go at the rest =). Idk if i've written it so others can understand it =S
Yeah Idk...

Leilani had a saying. Actually Leilani had many sayings. She has a quote relevant to every situation آپ could ever think of. The beginning starts with a finish. A finish is never truly the end. And the end comes only when آپ choose It to.
“ The sun has set there will be no gloom filled rooms. Why cry for a soul set free?”
There’s a lump in my throat threatening to dissolve into tears but I can almost see her in the front row, her smile begging me to go on.
“Do not stand on my grave and weep; I am not there I do not sleep.”
I continue barely conscious of what I’m saying. Things fade in and out nut all is fuzzy. I spot a face leaning against the دیوار at the back of the church. His face.
“Gone, yet not forgotten. Although we are apart...”
I hear myself still addressing the grieving crowd, still only half aware of what I’m saying. I catch his eye and look down. The lump gets bigger and I become aware of exactly how exhausted I am. I look up to watch his back disappear through the church doors.
“Your spirit lives within me, forever in my heart”
I feel weak, something I’ve been feeling way too often lately. I’ve been pushing the memory of that دن away every time its surfaced my mind and now is no different. Leilani’s last دن on earth is not something I want to remember. I haven’t cried since that night, three weeks ago. I hear what people say, they say I don’t care, I never loved her. Some say I’m in shock and haven’t realised what has happened. Everyone is wrong. I do care, I did love her and I know exactly what has happened. I was there. I’m numb, barely alive. I haven’t really been aware of anything. Not until I watched him and his bla
 sapphire007 posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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Writing جوابات

pixie09 said:
wow, this is really good, and i know that u aren't putting مزید up, but a lot could be developed from it, and i think it would be interesting.
yes, i understand what is going on, and i really like how آپ wrote it because it is subtle. it compels آپ to read more
about the spelling and grammar, it would be kind of ironic for me to say anything on the subject :p ..
good job, i really liked it
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
Aisuanime said:
Thats one of the best ive seen on here. and im being serous on that. Its good, i dont know why آپ arent going to continue but its good. I dont care for grammer یا spelling cuz then if there is something wrong in one of my stories, WORD is usually there to help. and it alll made sense, dont worry X)
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
XOsmileyariXO said:
this was very, very good story!!
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
ruby1000 said:
Amazing آپ have a great amount of skill and writing style.
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
KATIE4DAMON said:
This is GREAT . I would love to read the rest.
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
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