Charm-the Real Feminine Mystique:
"A girl need not have perfect features nor an outstanding figure to be popular. But she should have charm. As Sir James Barrie had Maggie say in his play, What Every Woman Knows, 'If آپ have it, آپ don't need to have anything else; and if آپ don't have it, it doesn't much matter what else آپ have.'
Once آپ have acquired charm, you'll probably never lose it. Especially after آپ have discovered how much happier your life is because آپ are considered to be that charming girl down the street.
To be charming آپ need not to be any particular age, weight یا height یا have any specific coloring یا proportions. Charm is like an essence. It is easier to recognize it in a person than to define it, although Webster's Third New International Dictionary says that charm is 'a combination of entirely attractive and delightful traits.'
مصنف and scholar Havelock Ellis wrote, 'Charm is a woman's strength just as strength is a man's charm.'"
So some of آپ might have guessed as much, but I am definitely a person who is living "out of my time" in the sense that I feel like I would fit in better with a different era. That being said, I have one of those old "Charm Handbooks" from the early 1970s before American woman started throwing away all of their charm and graces out of the window. I love this book, the values it teaches and the advice it gives. Most of all, I love how this book has never made me feel مزید proud of femininity and what true femininity produces. I wish that charm schools were still a big deal in America, especially since they are مزید needed now than they were in their time. Since this valuable wealth of knowledge has been cast away as "old-timey" instead of recognized as "tried and true", I thought I would share some of it here, for those who still care about women having grace, respecting each other and having better relations with other people. In relation to the Disney Princesses, I have attached each DP to the attribute of charm that I think she best represents:
"Don't blame your family, circumstances یا birth for what آپ are. Your personality can become the way آپ wish it to be... It is up to آپ to make the changes necessary for improvement. Changing is a part of growing, a process that began when آپ were born. It continues all your life. سے طرف کی giving مزید thought to your attitudes, آپ can alter and redirect the course of your life.
Remember you'll only be as beautiful as the inner آپ permits. Cosmetics, clothing, and a trim figure can do wonders, but they can seldom hide a distorted inner you."
Poise: Aurora
The poised girl maintains calm when she has a difficult situation to handle. She goes about it naturally and easily and avoids nervous movements of the body. This will only serve to work to her advantage. She does not want to let her enemies know they have affected her and she doesn't want to lose her head in impulsive and irrational thoughts. Her grace will also help her lead others into being مزید calm in a difficult situation.
Spirit of Adventure: Ariel
Since آپ can't always pack your bags and sail to faraway islands, begin to develop a spirit of adventure سے طرف کی trying new ideas, new thoughts, a new method of study, a new way of wearing your hair یا even a new food! Trying new things opens up مزید possibilities in your life. آپ will be able to learn مزید about yourself (including what آپ like and don't like) as well as others. [This will also give آپ مزید to talk about with a bigger range of diverse people.]
Sense of Humor: Anna
You'll find the person آپ enjoy being with most is the one who finds the things آپ say witty. مزید important, the one who enjoys being with آپ is also someone whose wit آپ appreciate. Look for the things in life worth laughing about. If آپ take yourself too seriously and cannot laugh about simple things, this will have an effect on your later مجموعی طور پر health. You'll get extra points for telling a funny story about yourself. Remember, however, to laugh with people, not at them.
Appreciation of Beauty: جیسمین, یاسمین & Pocahontas
آپ can hardly be charming and beautiful if آپ can't see and feel beauty. If آپ haven't thought about it, try, to appreciate the beautiful things in life. There is beauty all around- in the shape of a leaf, the changing sky, the smell of spring, یا the laughter of a friend.
Be An Interesting/Interested Conversationalist: Elsa
آپ should be interesting to others. That means آپ must be able to contribute to a conversation- at a party, in groups, large یا small, even on a one-to-one basis. Find out what آپ really like. Learn to talk about interests such as music, books, فلمیں یا sports etc.
Spiritual Graciousness: Snow White
Spiritual graciousness is at the دل of charm. Know and practice the courtesies of daily living. Avoid jokes at the expense of others; avoid gossip and a condemnatory attitude. Forgive those who hurt you. دکھائیں tolerance for those who upset you. Generosity of spirit involves giving credit and praise from when they are deserved. Respect the opinions and rights of other people. Treat them the way آپ would like to be treated regardless of their station in life. The Golden Rule is as important today as ever.
Balanced Emotions: Cinderella & Belle
Perhaps the hardest requirement of all is self-discipline- control of yourself and your emotions. Spontaneously دکھانا happiness, joy, surprise- یا even annoyance when آپ are angered- is to be true to yourself. But to live happily with others, آپ also must exercise self-control. It is this balance between spontaneity of feelings and discipline یا control that آپ will want to achieve.
Making Friends: Rapunzel
The charming girl is interested in virtually all [good] people and all aspects of life. She knows that almost everyone [decent] can contribute something to her life. So meet and make new friends; don't your دائرے, حلقہ of دوستوں to just a few if آپ really want to grow.
Good Family Relationships & Values: Mulan & Tiana
Because we are so close to our families, we tend to lose sight of the fact that they deserve the same courtesies we give others [especially strangers]. Too often we expect our parents, siblings, etc. to give مزید to us than we give to them. There should be mutual respect and understanding within family groups. If آپ don't think آپ are getting it, try giving it. It will probably be returned.
Self-Confidence: Merida
If آپ don't like yourself, if آپ don't feel your actions, habits یا appearance can stand competition, یا comparison, آپ lack self-confidence. If آپ don't believe in yourself, no one else will. If آپ do believe in yourself, there is almost nothing in life آپ wont be able to do.
"A girl need not have perfect features nor an outstanding figure to be popular. But she should have charm. As Sir James Barrie had Maggie say in his play, What Every Woman Knows, 'If آپ have it, آپ don't need to have anything else; and if آپ don't have it, it doesn't much matter what else آپ have.'
Once آپ have acquired charm, you'll probably never lose it. Especially after آپ have discovered how much happier your life is because آپ are considered to be that charming girl down the street.
To be charming آپ need not to be any particular age, weight یا height یا have any specific coloring یا proportions. Charm is like an essence. It is easier to recognize it in a person than to define it, although Webster's Third New International Dictionary says that charm is 'a combination of entirely attractive and delightful traits.'
مصنف and scholar Havelock Ellis wrote, 'Charm is a woman's strength just as strength is a man's charm.'"
So some of آپ might have guessed as much, but I am definitely a person who is living "out of my time" in the sense that I feel like I would fit in better with a different era. That being said, I have one of those old "Charm Handbooks" from the early 1970s before American woman started throwing away all of their charm and graces out of the window. I love this book, the values it teaches and the advice it gives. Most of all, I love how this book has never made me feel مزید proud of femininity and what true femininity produces. I wish that charm schools were still a big deal in America, especially since they are مزید needed now than they were in their time. Since this valuable wealth of knowledge has been cast away as "old-timey" instead of recognized as "tried and true", I thought I would share some of it here, for those who still care about women having grace, respecting each other and having better relations with other people. In relation to the Disney Princesses, I have attached each DP to the attribute of charm that I think she best represents:
"Don't blame your family, circumstances یا birth for what آپ are. Your personality can become the way آپ wish it to be... It is up to آپ to make the changes necessary for improvement. Changing is a part of growing, a process that began when آپ were born. It continues all your life. سے طرف کی giving مزید thought to your attitudes, آپ can alter and redirect the course of your life.
Remember you'll only be as beautiful as the inner آپ permits. Cosmetics, clothing, and a trim figure can do wonders, but they can seldom hide a distorted inner you."
Poise: Aurora
The poised girl maintains calm when she has a difficult situation to handle. She goes about it naturally and easily and avoids nervous movements of the body. This will only serve to work to her advantage. She does not want to let her enemies know they have affected her and she doesn't want to lose her head in impulsive and irrational thoughts. Her grace will also help her lead others into being مزید calm in a difficult situation.
Spirit of Adventure: Ariel
Since آپ can't always pack your bags and sail to faraway islands, begin to develop a spirit of adventure سے طرف کی trying new ideas, new thoughts, a new method of study, a new way of wearing your hair یا even a new food! Trying new things opens up مزید possibilities in your life. آپ will be able to learn مزید about yourself (including what آپ like and don't like) as well as others. [This will also give آپ مزید to talk about with a bigger range of diverse people.]
Sense of Humor: Anna
You'll find the person آپ enjoy being with most is the one who finds the things آپ say witty. مزید important, the one who enjoys being with آپ is also someone whose wit آپ appreciate. Look for the things in life worth laughing about. If آپ take yourself too seriously and cannot laugh about simple things, this will have an effect on your later مجموعی طور پر health. You'll get extra points for telling a funny story about yourself. Remember, however, to laugh with people, not at them.
Appreciation of Beauty: جیسمین, یاسمین & Pocahontas
آپ can hardly be charming and beautiful if آپ can't see and feel beauty. If آپ haven't thought about it, try, to appreciate the beautiful things in life. There is beauty all around- in the shape of a leaf, the changing sky, the smell of spring, یا the laughter of a friend.
Be An Interesting/Interested Conversationalist: Elsa
آپ should be interesting to others. That means آپ must be able to contribute to a conversation- at a party, in groups, large یا small, even on a one-to-one basis. Find out what آپ really like. Learn to talk about interests such as music, books, فلمیں یا sports etc.
Spiritual Graciousness: Snow White
Spiritual graciousness is at the دل of charm. Know and practice the courtesies of daily living. Avoid jokes at the expense of others; avoid gossip and a condemnatory attitude. Forgive those who hurt you. دکھائیں tolerance for those who upset you. Generosity of spirit involves giving credit and praise from when they are deserved. Respect the opinions and rights of other people. Treat them the way آپ would like to be treated regardless of their station in life. The Golden Rule is as important today as ever.
Balanced Emotions: Cinderella & Belle
Perhaps the hardest requirement of all is self-discipline- control of yourself and your emotions. Spontaneously دکھانا happiness, joy, surprise- یا even annoyance when آپ are angered- is to be true to yourself. But to live happily with others, آپ also must exercise self-control. It is this balance between spontaneity of feelings and discipline یا control that آپ will want to achieve.
Making Friends: Rapunzel
The charming girl is interested in virtually all [good] people and all aspects of life. She knows that almost everyone [decent] can contribute something to her life. So meet and make new friends; don't your دائرے, حلقہ of دوستوں to just a few if آپ really want to grow.
Good Family Relationships & Values: Mulan & Tiana
Because we are so close to our families, we tend to lose sight of the fact that they deserve the same courtesies we give others [especially strangers]. Too often we expect our parents, siblings, etc. to give مزید to us than we give to them. There should be mutual respect and understanding within family groups. If آپ don't think آپ are getting it, try giving it. It will probably be returned.
Self-Confidence: Merida
If آپ don't like yourself, if آپ don't feel your actions, habits یا appearance can stand competition, یا comparison, آپ lack self-confidence. If آپ don't believe in yourself, no one else will. If آپ do believe in yourself, there is almost nothing in life آپ wont be able to do.