10. Sing “Discovery Channel” سے طرف کی the Bloodhound Gang in your head whenever he is near.

9. Hotwire his Volvo and take it on a joyride.

8. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically paedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.

7. Ask how Tanya is.

6. End every argument with “Bite me, Edward.”

5. Call him Romeo both behind his back and to his face.

4. Whenever he complains یا argues, reply with “What are آپ gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?”

3. Tell him his hair isn’t bronze, it’s ginger, and he should stop denying himself – he’s a ranga.

2. Whenever he leaves a room یا says goodbye, get down on your knees and beg him not to go, not again.

And the Number One way to annoy Edward Cullen?

1. Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Like a Virgin” سے طرف کی Madonna.

10. Take her credit cards and shopping vouchers, hold them above your head and tell her to “jump for it”.

9. Tell her if she was just a few centimetres shorter she could legally be a midget.

8. Wear the trashiest possible clothing whenever آپ can.

7. Tie her up in a straightjacket. When she protests, tell her she needs to go back to the loony bin.

6. When آپ go into the sun with her, fall into a twitching heap on the ground and moan “I’m melting.”

5. Pelt her with cloves of garlic.

4. When she gets a vision, ask if her “spidey senses” are tingling.

3. Trip her up and ask if she saw it coming.

2. Ask her what آپ will be doing in five منٹ every ten minutes.

And the Number One way to annoy Alice Cullen?

1. میل ای her dozens of application forms for the position of speaker on psychic hotlines.