Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life 

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Christians often focus so much on being loving and giving that they forget their own limits and limitations. Have you ever found yourself wondering:

• How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money?

• Why do I feel guilty when I consider setting boundaries?

In this Gold Medallion Award–winning book, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend give you biblically based answers to these and other tough questions, and show you how to set healthy boundaries with your parents, spouses, children, friends, coworkers, and even yourself.

Boundaries are personal property lines that define who you are and who you are not, and influence all areas of your life.

Physical boundaries help you determine who may touch you and under what circumstances.

Mental boundaries give you the freedom to have your own thoughts and opinions.

Emotional boundaries help you deal with your own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others.

Spiritual boundaries help you distinguish God’s will from your own and give you renewed awe for your Creator.

Unpacking ten “laws of boundaries,” Drs. Cloud and Townsend show you how to bring new health to your relationships. You’ll discover firsthand how sound boundaries give you the freedom to walk as the loving, giving, fulfilled individual God created you to be.

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In order to call themselves good Christians, many people have drawn overly flexible boundaries (unwilling to say no, always accommodating others\' needs) or overly rigid boundaries (to the point of being righteous and judgmental). Psychologists and inspirational speakers Cloud and Townsend show readers how to set reasonable boundaries in order to follow the true path of Christianity. This book has become immensely popular, most likely because it makes personal boundaries easier to define and is filled with spiritual purpose. Some cautions: the format can be overly self-helpish for such a complex discussion and the authors at one point imply that judicious spankings may be an acceptable form of setting boundaries with children. However, many Christians will probably find themselves grateful for this biblical context of boundaries.

--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

\'Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend have great insights and practical wisdom into the God-given gift of boundaries. As they discuss how to take responsibility for and ownership of our lives, they give hope that we cannot just survive -- but thrive!\' -- Josh McDowell, Author, Author and Speaker <br><br>

Publisher: Zondervan on Brilliance Audio; MP3 Una edition (June 10, 2014)

Shipping Weight: 0.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)

Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #36,706 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Great book to help you learn how to set boundaries in your life. 

Great book; Biblically based and very easy to read. 

Perhaps the most helpful part of this book, in my opinion, is its expose of the many myths that well-meaning Christian believers have about the setting of boundaries. 

As a Christian, I continually struggled with feeling depressed from being a doormat, and being nice because it was "part of the abundant Christian life." Everyone spoke about Christianity as being a joyful, full life that I would love and never want to return to the secular world. Then why did I feel so miserable? Why did the secular world seem so appealing, where I could be as nasty and selfish as I wanted to?The answer was in "Boundaries". As I read the book, I could identify with something in every chapter. I\'m the type of person who will let everyone else step all over me to keep themselves happy. As long as I didn\'t raise a ruckus, and the peace was kept, everything was okay, right? WRONG! Inside I was always seething with anger, and I was livid with the fact that I had to continually step out of the way for everyone else while they ran right over me.

Through reading this book, I realized that it\'s OK to set boundaries in all interactions; in fact, I now believe that it would be wrong NOT to set boundaries in things. Slowly but surely, with the help from this book\'s message, I\'ve been setting boundaries for a happier life that\'s filled with more peace, joy, and abundance than ever.

This Book--> The Pencil That Will Help You Draw the Lines

Wow, why didn\'t I ever know about this book? You don\'t hear much about it- I stumbled upon it browsing around Amazon one day. For people wondering if they should buy this book, get it if:

-you feel like there\'s a problem because you\'re trying to be a good person all the time by always saying "yes"

In a nutshell, this book is for people who don\'t know how to set boundaries for themselves. In other words, they\'re always saying "yes" to things and taking responsibility for things- even when it\'s not their job.

And boundary lines of your responsibilities need to be present in more areas of your life than you might realize, such as...

The book covers boundary conflicts in each of these areas leaving no stone unturned. Therefore, its no big deal if you have only one or two problem areas- just go to those sections.

This book will help you realize what a boundary is, why it\'s okay to have them and just how to develop them. So if anything in this review sounds like if might apply to you- don\'t hesitate to check out the book. Other neat self-help books I liked include "Finding Happiness in a Frustrating World".

Excellent Self-Help Guide for men & women of all ages

I found Boundaries to be extremely helpful to me and my family. The authors point to Biblical references for boundary development & enforcement. The authors also illustrate real-life examples of people who have boundary issues and give practical advice on how to resolve conflicts in all relationships...parent-child, spouse-spouse, friend-friend, etc. I firmly believe that this book is vital for people who desire to have Godly, healthy relationships. When my children are mature enough to read & understand this book, I will definitely encourage them to read it. I believe that it will be helpful for my children as they prepare for adulthood and also as they begin searching for a mate. I highly recommend this book for everyone who is in the midst of relationship trials & tribulations.

Recently I\'d reached a stage of being overwhelmed by life; I\'d been recommended several books, and I read "Boundaries" as the first one, the others being "Ordering Your Private World" by Gordon MacDonald and "The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren. After reading Boundaries, I have come to terms with my own inability to set personal boundaries and I took ownership of my own choices which I have made.

On reading several negative comments about the book, I notice the persons complain of things that are actually not promoted in the book - there is a balance that is actually promoted, that boundaries are not an excuse to say "No", as irresponsibility is warned as another extreme of boundaries and goes against biblical principles. Some persons complained that people didn\'t seem to like them after they established boundaries, "Bonding first, boundaries second". Like any concept it could be taken to an extreme. I should warn that without a strong biblical background or the support of a group these concepts could easily be misapplied and used as weapons (boundaries are not weapons) instead of defenses to protect who we are.

The risk of misapplication of the concepts does not negate the fatc that this book is biblically sound, and promotes healthy relational concepts -- if applied correctly.

Very beneficial to those who always seem to be way too busy!

I am so glad that I read this book. I have begun to see that I need to set boundaries in my life and that it is OK to do that. So many people today are "burnt out" and "at the end of their rope" because they take on too much responsibilty. This book will seriously help you to see where you need to change and will give you good instruction in how to change. You CAN set good, healthy boundaries in your life! This is a book that you really need to read!

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Learned what healthy boundaries are gave me hope and wisdom into the God-given gift of boundaries. This insightful book helped change my life and set my spirit free! Read more

As a counselor I recommend this book often 😎

I recommend everyone to read this book. Easy to read and understand. What I love the most is that it is based on what the bible teaches us about loving others, but not let them... Read more

Someone bought this book for me and now I keep buying it for friends. It has been a useful book. For me it helped me be able to say "no thank you" to family, in-laws,... Read more

I love this book. The only down side of it is that Christianity is clearly weaved into it, and not everyone aligns with this point of view. Read more

Great book for those that are studying psychology or going into the counseling field.

Excellent book, should have read it years ago

Excellent book, should have read it years ago. I will be able to identify negative people sooner and keep them at arms length or further.

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Changes That Heal by Henry Cloud in Front Matter, Back Matter (1), and Back Matter (2)

Love Must Be Tough by James Dobson on page 117, and Back Matter

Hiding from Love by John Townsend in Front Matter, and Back Matter

How to Get a Job by James D. Bramlett on page 199, and Back Matter

I\'m More Than the Pastor\'s Wife by Lorna Dobson in Back Matter (1), and Back Matter (2)

Finding Your Way Through Domestic Abuse: A Guide to Physical, Emotional, And Spiritual Healing by Connie Fourre in Back Matter (1), and Back Matter (2)

The Emotionally Healthy Church: A Strategy for Discipleship that Actually Changes Lives by Peter Scazzero in Back Matter (1), and Back Matter (2)

12 "Christian" Beliefs That Can Drive You Crazy by Henry Cloud in Back Matter (1), and Back Matter (2)

Mentoring Engaged and Newlywed Couples Leader\'s Guide: Building Marriages That Love for a Lifetime by Les Parrott in Back Matter

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