What do آپ guy's think of my character?

Here is another one of my Original Characters. Her name is Alessandra Sofia.
- She likes: (as it says) Singing, dancing, gymnastics, shopping, موسیقی (of course), sweets (but not too many sweets), dating, chatting with friends, showering, online shooting and modeling magazines.
- She does not like: Homework, Early mornings, singing off key, gaining weight, her hair getting messy and people saying bad things about Italy یا her friends.
- She was born and raised in Italy but she and her family moved to the United States سے طرف کی the age of 16. سے طرف کی the age of 21, she is a junior in a college at New York City. And even as an early adult still hasn't lost touch of her Italian roots. She had always had dreams of being the اگلے greatest pop سٹار, ستارہ and spends a lot of time focusing on her singing career while still keeping track of her school work. She is also a جمناسٹ, گیمناسٹ as she had gotten her body in shape to be one of the most dedicated members there are and she also uses the moves she learned in gymnastics such as hand springs and cartwheels to perform on stage (such as at talent shows). Not only that, but alot of people at her یونیورسٹی is so amazed سے طرف کی her beauty, talent and fashion sense that she's slowly becoming مزید مقبول as the days go on. Her popularity has been so high that she's even been making her own CDs and selling them to her fans. Songs featuring covers سے طرف کی other artist but they mostly contain songs she wrote herself, dubbed in both Italian and English.

So what do آپ guys think of her?
 What do آپ guy's think of my character?
 sMCCarthyTV posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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BlondLionEzel said:
I LOVE it!
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
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Thnaks ^^ Atleast someone does
sMCCarthyTV posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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At least someone does? Listen to the people critizizing! They're all right!
misscrazel posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
tamore said:
two dimensional and cliche af tbh
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
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cliche? How so?
sMCCarthyTV posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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a pretty girl who wants to be a singer who cares about shopping and grades..........
tamore posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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the italian thing is the only part that's not a cliche but she still totally lacks any depth, which maybe is what آپ going for but it makes her unattractive in my eyes
tamore posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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*you're
tamore posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
sieluvzsoul said:
Is she supposed to be a vocaloid یا something? Either way she seems aight. Maybe a little too cliche though. And maybe آپ should make her hair a certain color not rainbow
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
SeeUV3 said:
I don't like the art too much....
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
AmyRoseReal said:
She sounds AND looks like your typical عملی حکمت character. Her anatomy is, um...strange. Way too cliche.
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
Shadowmarioking said:
ngl alessandras a bland character
yes, she can do all these things, but that is exactly what kills her. shes too much in a single package. it seems everyone likes her and is amazed سے طرف کی her, her popularitys exceeded thus far that she can make her own CDs and sell them independently. there is no struggle, there are no faults stated, she is what anyone would strive to be and that is what makes her completely unappealing. آپ may be able to showcase this sort of character and have them appreicated سے طرف کی a limited audience. i guarentee آپ that a majority of people may not take this character very lightly and see them as "over the top" یا as some users have been stating "cliche"

when it comes to the design there are WAAAAAAAAAAY too many colors. color directs the eyes to focus on a specific area but looking at alessandra i dont even know where to begin. the multi colored hair is an eyesore when mixed in w/ the colored outfit. everythings just very bright and while i can understand if this was done b/cause of the lack of any other colors its still too much. i dont even know whats on her head (ears?? a bow??)

what i would recommend jic tl;dr is that آپ run your character through a mary sue test and give her some sort of antagonist and flaws. get rid of whatever isnt necessary to make her a singer. yes, she can do gymnastics but on the side and even then she doesnt have to be astounding at it. hell, make her lousy at it to counter the concept that she is some sort of superhuman mary sue

on a side note i envy your handwriting b/cause that is gorgeous
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
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also if youre unsure what to do if your character comes up as a mary sue i recommend starting over from scratch and learning a lot about the struggles when it comes to becoming a musician and possibly health consequences and the lifestyle alessandra might actually lead
Shadowmarioking posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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random سوال coming at ya... ever read Ender's Game?
True-Finn-Fan posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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^no
Shadowmarioking posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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^just checking something, thanks.
True-Finn-Fan posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
walnoot said:
basically everything shadowmarioking said.
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
DaringDevil said:
I totally agree with shadowmarioking and no I'm not impressed سے طرف کی your character
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
misscrazel said:
Total Mary-sue. Sorry, but آپ need to fix her a little. 'she had gotten her body in shape to be one of the most dedicated members there are', 'uses the moves she learned in gymnastics such as hand springs and cartwheels to perform on stage (such as at talent shows)', and 'Not only that, but alot of people at her یونیورسٹی is so amazed سے طرف کی her beauty, talent and fashion sense that she's slowly becoming مزید مقبول as the days go on' scream Mary-sue. Also the name Alessandra Sofia is totally Mary-sue. I think آپ have great potential for a good character and plot though.
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
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Iliked the Italy thing though. Gives your character a tiny bit of depth.
misscrazel posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
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Here are some tips: give her some intresting things. Maybe she has a colection of china dolls? Maybe she loves a certain book یا movie? Give her one یا two hair coulours. قوس قزح hair is NOT working with her design. Give her obstacles. I myself want to be a singer. My obstacles: my disorder, people discouraging me, not having band members, not knowing how to start, thinking I had a bad voice, etc. I even considered giving up a few times.
misscrazel posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک
egyptprincess7 said:
Sorry but your character really sounds really cliche. She sounds like a typical character honestly. آپ should really kind of change a lot of things. I'll send آپ some references if آپ want. The Italy part was really original though.
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
Mollymolata said:
Looks great. Good Job!
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
Syltre said:
I'm really sorry about this but, I think your character is way too cliche. Your character seems like it's good at almost everything and is very مقبول and smart. Those kind of characters are nice and admired but she's... too good at everything. Which takes out all of the interests in the character. The Italian part about her is interesting and unique though.
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
True-Finn-Fan said:
it feels vague and has too much success and not enough challenge. i mean i can sum it up like this... she shows up in the US from Italy, goes to college, had a very stereotypical immigrant dream = "become famous", was a Mary Sue in college, becomes famous... the end.

where's the challenge, where's the conflict? to make a good character آپ need to give the character flaws that stick, like stage fright یا bad sinning voice...

if آپ were to say that she always wanted to be a pop سٹار, ستارہ and had written so many good songs but her voice wasn't good enough to express them یا get them recognized then the character would be مزید interesting and would make for a better story. and maybe she's getting bad grades in one class because wasting time in class writing new songs یا something... to say she's just 'story perfect' is kinda... overdone and uninteresting.

give her something that's not desirable, a flaw, a mistake, a screw up, and then her character becomes مزید complete and original.

the drawing wasn't bad though, much better than anything i could have drawn. the hair was a little overdone on color but... to every man his own i guess.
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
neonClouds said:
Mary sue, total cliche storm
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posted پہلے زیادہ سے سال ایک 
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