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posted by lloonny
1. Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
2. Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas
3. Chuck Norris will never have a دل attack. His دل isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
4. If at first آپ don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
5. Chuck Norris can set ants on آگ کے, آگ with a magnifying glass. At night.
6. Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
7. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
8. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
9....
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posted by shomill
M R snakes.
M A no snakes.
O S M R snakes.
CDBDI's?
O S! M R snakes!
AAAAAAAAAA!

-My dad told me this one years and years ago. I'd almost forgotten it until tonight. Here's another one:

Mairzy dotes and dozy dotes and liddlamszy divy.

-The answer: Mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy.

And an old knock-knock joke:
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
کیلا who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
کیلا who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
کیلا who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
مالٹا, نارنگی who?
مالٹا, نارنگی آپ glad I didn't say کیلا again?

Hope آپ had fun!
posted by jblovesme4ever
 random pic
random pic
1. Pretend to cough every time your teacher says the word "learn". :D
Raise your hand every time the teacher asks a question, and make the conversation go a little like this:

Teacher:What is the answer? (after they call on you)
You:I don't know
T: Then why did آپ raise your hand?
Y: I need to go to the bathroom.
T: Then go ahead, if آپ must.
Y: Nevermind, I don't need to go anymore

Repeat this as many times as possible.
3. Pass blank pieces of folded paper to confuse your teachers when they catch آپ "passing notes."

4. Fall out of your chair and pretend to faint. Repeat 3 مزید times:D

5. Yell "OMG...
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1. Afrikaan -- Ek is lief vir jou!

2. Albanian -- Te dua!

3 .Amharic -- Afekrishalehou!

4. Arabic -- Ohiboke( male to female )

Nohiboka ( female to male )

5. Armenian -- Yes kez si'rumem!

6. Basque -- Maite zaitut!

7. Bengali -- Ami tomake bahlobashi!

8. Bosnian -- Volim te!

9. Bulgarian -- Obicham te!

10. Catalan -- T'estimo!

11. Creole -- Mi aime jou!

12. Croatian -- Volim te!

13. Czech -- Miluji tev!

14. Danish --Jeg elsker dig!

15. Dutch -- Ik hou وین je!

16. English -- I love you!

17. Esperanto -- Mi amas vin!

18. Estonian -- Mina armastan sind!

19. Farsi -- Tora dost daram!

20. Filipino -- Iniibig kita!...
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25 REASONS WHY I OWE MY MOTHER


1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .


"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.


"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL .


"If آپ don't straighten up, I'm going to knock آپ into the middle of اگلے week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.


" Because I کہا so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me مزید LOGIC .


"If آپ fall out of that سوئنگ, جھول and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.


"Make sure...
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