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37 rude and crude pick up lines

posted by australia-101

37 Rude & Crude Pick-up Lines
1. I wish آپ were a door so I could slam آپ all day.
2. Nice legs...what time do they open?
3. Do آپ work for UPS? I thought I saw آپ checking out my package.
4. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
5. Can I buy آپ a drink یا do آپ just want the money?
6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted بستر Thrasher: have آپ seen one?
8. I'm fighting the urge to make آپ the happiest woman on earth tonight.
9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and آپ can...

5

A Funny Prank to Pull on Your دوستوں

posted by taytrain97

This prank doesn't need anything but a friend who understands dirty jokes and yourself.

You: Okay, say the word 'addicted' every time I pause, alright?
Friend: Okay.
You: Money...
Friend: Addicted.
You: TV...
Friend: Addicted.
You: Candy...
Friend: Addicted.
You: Hitting people in the face with an iron...
Friend: ...addicted...

By this point آپ need to come up with several different others to get them to barely even notice what they're "addicted" to.

You: Soda?
Friend: Addicted...
You: What hit آپ in the face last night?
Friend: Addicted...

The look that will come over their face will be absolutely priceless.
Try it out!

-Ray

4

I Won't Be Left Behind

posted by milorox18

I run my fastest
But still get beat.
I land on my head
When I should be on my feet.
I try to اقدام forward‚
But I am stuck in rewind.
Why do I keep at it?
I won't be left behind.

The harder I am thrown‚
The higher I bounce.
I give it my all‚
And that's all that counts.
In first place‚
Myself‚ I seldom find.
So I push to the limit-
I won't be left behind.

Some people tell me آپ can't‚
Some say don't.
Some simply give up.
I reply‚ I won't

The power is here‚
Locked away in my mind.
My perserverance is my excellence‚
I won't be left behind.

Make the best of each moment‚
The future is soon the past.
The مزید I tell myself this‚
The less I come in last.
Throughout my competitions‚
I've learned what winning is about.
A plain and clear lesson-
Giving up is the wasy way out.

So every night before I go to bed‚
I hope in a small way I have shined.
Tomorrow is a brand-new day‚
And I won't be left behind.

This is not mine‚ it was written سے طرف کی Sara Nachtman