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posted by IsabellaMCullen
I didn't make this, I just found it...


1.Stick your open palm under the stall دیوار and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"

2.Say, "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't have put my lips on that."

3.Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.

4.Say, "Damn, this water's cold."

5.Drop a marble and say, "Oh shit! My glass eye!"

6.Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."

7.Grunt and strain real loud for 30 سیکنڈ and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.

8.Say, "Now how did that get there?"

9.Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."

10.Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, "Whoa! Easy boy!"

11.Say, "Interesting... مزید floaters than sinkers."

12.Using a small squeeze tube, spread مونگفلی, مونگ پھلی مکھن on a wad of toilet paper and drop the wad under the stall دیوار of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could آپ kick that back over here please?"

13.Say, "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me."

14.Fill a balloon with creamed corn. Rush into the stall with your hand over your mouth and let out a lengthy vomit impression while آپ squeeze the balloon and splatter cream مکئی all about. Apologize profusely and blame it on the restaurant's coffee آپ had for breakfast.

15.Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot."

16.Say, "Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?"

17.Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.

18.Before آپ unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your "Cross-Dressers Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.

19.Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall, adjust it so آپ can see your neighbor and say, "Peek-a-boo!"

20.Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall دیوار and sing "Born Free".

21.Come out of the stall with wet hands.

22.Pour water in a constant stream on the floor and say, 'Darn, I almost made it!'

23.Wash آپ hair and dry it in the hand dryer.

24.Wear paper towels wrapped around your head and pretend you're Erykah Badu.

25.Write on the دیوار of a women's bathroom 'Tom was here.' 'In the men's bathroom write 'Michael Jackson was here.'

26.Ask a person in the stall اگلے to آپ for a tampon.

27.Roll a roll of toilet paper all the way down the row of stalls.

28.For a woman, stand in front of the toilet. For men, sit down in the stall and pee.

29.Scream 'Ohh it burns!' as آپ use the bathroom.

30.Lock the door from the inside, sound frustrated that آپ can't get out, then crawl under the door, getting as dirty as possible and complain to the manager that the door is faulty.

31.Introduce yourself to the guy at the اگلے urinal.

32.Turn the light off while stalls are occupied.

33.Stick your head over an occupied stall and ask for the time.

34.Tell people that they're on TV. Point to some random spot on the far دیوار and ask them to "smile for the camera".

35.Lie down across all the sinks and pretend to be passed out.

36.Use a stopwatch to time people going to the bathroom. Cheer them on to encourage good performance.

37.Hold your hand in front of a hand dryer while someone's using it.

38.Pour a bucket of water over an occupied stall.

39.Grab someone's پچھواڑے, گدا really hard while they're using a urinal, and see how far آپ can get before they catch you.

40.Guard the paper towel dispenser in the name of the Earth Liberation Front.

41.Say to the guy at the اگلے urinal: "This is the best part about being gay."

42.Say, "Huh, that's funny. I don't remember eating asparagus."

43.Turn off the faucet while someone's washing their hands. Repeat.

44.Pee on someone's leg and tell them it's raining.

45.Offer to blow-dry other people's hands with your mouth to save energy.

46.Point at someone's crotch while they're using a urinal and yell, "Ha ha, your fly is down!"

47.Put on a hand puppet دکھائیں underneath the stall اگلے to you.

48.Complain about the size of your penis.

49.While inside the bathroom, ask where the nearest bathroom is. After you've received a puzzled look یا response, reply, "I'm not looking for a toilet, آپ moron, I'm looking for a bathroom. Haven't آپ ever taken a bath? Apparently not. No wonder it smells like shit in here."

50.Demand to know where the glory holes are.

51.Walk up behind someone who's using a urinal and لپیٹ, لفاف کریں his head in toilet paper.

52.Ask a friend to help آپ stage a live audio performance of a violent mugging for your unwitting audience inside the stalls. Make sure the final line of dialogue is, "You come out of there and I'll blow your fucking head off."

53.Inside a stall, pretend to be talking to a young child, "That's right Johnny, remember what I told آپ about unzipping your fly? Oh, now look what آپ did!" Then slap your hands twice and make crying noises.

54.Hang a realistic dummy from a noose inside one of the stalls as a wacky surprise for the اگلے visitor.

55.Knock on the stall اگلے to آپ and say, "Do آپ have enough toilet paper in there? I got plenty if آپ need some."

56.Put up a sign above the sink that says "Did آپ remember to wipe?"

57.In a restaurant, put up a sign that says, "This is the legally required 'Employees must wash hands' sign which we disregard on a daily basis."

58.Put up a sign that says "Caution: please do not use toilets."

59.Fill the liquid soap containers with motor oil.

60.Have (mobile) phone sex while standing at a urinal.

61.Flash people standing just outside the bathroom door. Tell them that you've finally "found the loophole".

62.Pump soap for people, give out paper towels, and demand tips.

63.Wear a camera around your neck and offer to take people's تصاویر for money.

64.When the bathroom is empty, get down on your hands and knees and hold your face over one of the urinals. Wait in that position until someone enters the bathroom. Act as if you're embarrassed to be caught.

65.Whisper, "Now spread your legs, honey. Oh yeah, that's it."

66.Drop a small, unclothed, plastic baby doll in a toilet, along with an ample supply of red food coloring.

67.Identify people who have not washed their hands. Follow them out of the bathroom and publicly announce this fact.

68.Congratulate yourself aloud on a job well done.

69.Put Vaseline on the toilet seats

70.Provide 'strenuous' sound-effects.

71.Ask the person in the اگلے stall if there's
anything swimming in THEIR bowl.....

72.Scream " Oh my GOD! What the hell is THAT?"

73.Pretend to fall in, complete with sound effects.

74.Knock on the doors of occupied stalls and ask if there is anyone in there. If so, ask if they are busy....

75.Kick in stall doors, camera in hand.

76.Fake an orgasm.

77.Collect a door charge.

78.Put cling-film (Glad Wrap) over the toilet bowl.

79.Replace rolls of toilet paper with rolls of sand paper.

80.Remove stall doors.

81.Place signs warning of 24 گھنٹہ video surveillance.

82.Make stall doors lockable only from the OUTSIDE.

83.Put itching powder on the toilet seats.

84.Leave a fried egg floating in the bowl.

85.Replace soap in dispenser with custard.

86.Replace condoms in vending machine with tampons (or vice versa).

87.When you're in a bathroom stall take a Snickers candy bar with آپ and when someone is اگلے to you, squish it in your hand and reach under the stall دیوار and say "You got any مزید toilet paper over there, This side's completely out."

88.Roll Easter Eggs under the doors.

89.Start a sing-a-long.

90.Act schizophrenically.

91.Masquerade as a door-to-door salesman.

92.Ask loudly "When does the movie start?"

93.Run around naked yelling "Where's the fish?"

94.Ask whether anyone can see your pet sewer rat/river python

95.Offer refreshments.

96.Run in, yelling "Free Willy!"

97.Bring a bottle of fake blood یا ketchup with you, and while in the stall, in a loud, demonical voice, exclaim "Satan demands a sacrifice... A SACRIFICE!" Start making groaning sounds and let loose a blood curling scream. Then let the blood/ketchup flow on the floor for everyone to see.

98.Look over the edge to the person at the urinal اگلے to you, giggle, and then return to your side, whistling the tune "It's a Small World After All."

99.Have a seizure. Bang against the walls of the stall really hard. Try to knock them down. If anyone later asks if آپ are okay, just say that آپ had some Mexican Jumping Fava Beans and they were reacting negatively with your stomach.

100.Walk in a man. Come out a woman. Complain that there are men in the bathroom.

101.Wet your head, and then sneak into a toilet stall. Flush the bowl and wait a minute. Walk out of the stall lurching, complaining about how dizzy آپ are.
added by storylover
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added by Kiniko90
Source: failblog.org
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added by fatoshleo
Source: tumblr.com
added by aitypw
added by CourtneyKatara
added by Team_Edward77
added by LuvWeezy7
Source: Me!
added by Jeffersonian
added by edwardcarlisle
Source: blogspot
added by sexybaby9087
added by sexybaby9087
added by iFly_12
(I gotta get some baby
Won’t آپ دکھائیں me some baby
I gotta get some baby)
Show me some positivity
(Mmmmm)
Show me some positivity (Oh, ooh, yeah)
From where I stand I see
A world of possibilities
So don’t be going negative on me oo baby yeah
Love is hard
That’s alright
Give it time
It’s worth the ride
You know
It’s all in the way you
You’re lookin’ at me
I’m lookin’ at you
What مزید do آپ want
Show me some positivity
It’s all that I got
It’s leading me on
Can’t leave it alone
Show me some positivity
You’re makin’ it harder
Than it has to be
So won’t u please دکھائیں me (He,e,e,e)
Some positivity...
continue reading...
posted by hetaliaitaly
Please dont tell me not to cry
Please dont say there was a reason why
My life has changed forever
It will never be the same

Am i just a pawn being played in your game?
Tell me to اقدام on with life
Forget it and be strong
But deep down way inside i dont want to go along

If آپ were there for me i wouldn't have just left
But if i am dead then what is the price of death
Im sick of playing with my life
I will never rest in peace
Not until the one that destroyed me
Has died a destruction death
posted by amy_the_demon
BY: me!!!!

coca: i want coca!!!
me: آپ want yourself O.o

barney: lets sing a lame پچھواڑے, گدا song!!!!

c+m: *screams like girls* NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Barney: *jumps off bridge*

--------------

*micowave dings*

me: le gasp!!!! my burrito کی, بوریٹو is done!!!!
*finds elmo eating my burrito*

me: ارے THAT'S MY BURRITO!!!!!!!!!!

coca: *bits elmo's arm*
I WILL BITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*barney walks in*

me: WTF!?!?!? YOUR SUPPOST TO BE DEAD!!!!!!!!!
barney: nom nom nom nom.........

coca: *throws elmo out the window*
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

*elmo lands on barney with a splat*

elmo: WHAT THE FUCK MAN!!!!!!!

coca: i though آپ were a KID'S show!
me: this is getting rediculous!!!!

elmo: kids suck.....
*me and coca gasp's*

barney: i hate my dino life......

me: we all do purple shit, we all do..

---------



FIN
posted by invadercalliope
Ok
It's time!
Get your popcorn.
Get your root bear.
get your chair.
Get your potato chip and eat it.
Famous Quotes:
1.The Beginning is the most important part of work.
2.Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another. "What آپ too? I thought i was the only one"
3.I shut my eyes in order to see.
4.Our Anxiety does not come from thinking about the future,but from wanting to control it.
5.A دن With out laughter is a دن wasted.
6.The Earth Has موسیقی For those who can listen.
7.Kind words can be short and easy to speak,but there echoes are turly endless.
8.You grow up the first دن آپ have first laugh- at yourself