Anvantages of suffering alone-
At least your love ones are happy.
Disadvantages of suffering alone-
You have no one to comfort you and no one understands how you feel.

Advantages to suffering with others-
At least your not the only one and you can talk about what's going on.
Disadvantages to suffering with others-
If the depression won't get you, your own guilt will.

Honestly, at first i thought it was better to suffer with others, but even if one person suffers slightly less if everyone else suffers with him/her, it is better for one person to suffer than for ten people to suffer.
So i'm going utilitarian on this one.

Misery loves company.

It really depends on the type of person.

Personally, I can't suffer with others. It irritates me. Even when my mother was going through chemo, I couldn't be around my family. I just... got irritated with them.

i hear ya bri-marie, sometimes when your upset you need time on your own, the attention can make you feel uncomfortable.

I think it's the attention that always gets me - the whole "Ooh, I understand your pain!" And then they want to hug you, and share their life-stories, and pet your head, and cry.

I think it's also seeing my pain on their faces. It's awkward - like... watching a video of yourself drunk or something.

Jody stole my quote. Which is tragically true.

Case in point: Me freaking out about a low score I got on a paper, then finding out three of my colleagues got the same low score. We're all failing - but at least it's not just me. ;o)

For me, it is.

EDIT: For now, this is what's best for me.

"Misery loves company"

Misery also loves selfishness.

If your lonely, miserable or sad it is okay to be alone for some time.. But it does feel good to let your hearth out by telling someone everything you need,right?

And i'm not telling you should make people unhappy {who are happy},just to Suffer along-side others who are also suffering.

For me, it'll be better to be upset alone. I'll gather my thoughts and get some breathing time to feel better later.

Depends on who we're talking about. For me, the sufferer, I'd like it more to have someone there, but for the people around me, I'd rather they don't see me suffering. I think that's what I'm trying to say. Personally, I would rather have someone with me, but I wouldn't say anything.
I general though, I believe it's better to have someone there.

I sometimes like to be alone, especially when I just had bad news. But I also learned to let myself be helped. Sometimes it is more selfish to suffer alone, when your family and friends want to help you, you should also give them the opportunity.

I feel worse suffering along-side others, since I feel like I would have to put on a brave face for everyone else.
Like when my dog died, after being sick for some time. I couldn't stand being around my family, and pulled away.

Without others by your side, you would die. As humans we need the company of others. When someone sees the bright side in something, they will spread it to the others suffering, making everyone a bit happier. There is no debate in this. If you suffer alone, you suffer forever, while if you suffer together, happiness comes in the morning.

If you suffer alone, you suffer forever, while if you suffer together, happiness comes in the morning.
That's not true. I go through more stress when I have to suffer with other people. It's much easier for me to work through my own pain and grievances alone.

from all these comments, i'm starting to think it might depend on the indiviual person.

I personally, am too proud to cry or even show signs of hurt in public, no one's meant to know about your pain. it's kind of a taboo subject for me, as it's awkward when everyone is either staring at you or patronising you....I just pretend everything's ok, and try and forget about it, and eventually, it'll be like nothing ever happened. For me as a indiviual, things i don't like i like to deny it.

i don't like seeing others suffering so I think I would prefer this instead, i think?

I would just unload my worries onto them and I'd hate that.

I want to clarify that I thought this question was asking if it's better to be the only victim of suffering, or to be one of several people suffering through the same thing. Not whether or not you are sharing your burden with a friend or therapist (which is always better).

My answer was strictly about how it makes a person feel. Isolation, on top of misery, can be devastating, but misery with a group can bond people, bring them closer than they ever could be, make you feel like you're part of something. Look at survivors of traumatic experiences who tend to stick together after the event. Even Stockholm Syndrome can be an example of this.

If I'm interpreting this right I feel like suffering with others who are suffering can lead to feeding off of each other. I have absolutely been in situations where my friend and I (both depressed af) were just feeding each other negativity and lamenting to each other to the point where we were just making each other more depressed.
Likewise (and I'll say this because I've come to terms with it at this point) when my brother died everyone in my family was suffering with one another and the energy in the house was horrendous. We were all miserable and when one of us would be like, "man I wish I were dead", everyone would start agreeing. Like there was no "no don't do that" it was, "we should all do it." Thankfully none of us acted upon that. But that's a very good example of why sometimes it's very bad to suffer along with others. It's an echochamber of negativity and nothing productive comes of it.

On the other hand sometimes it is absolutely horrible to suffer alone. Sometimes you need someone to help you bear a burden. But that person should probably be in a better state of mind than you and/or should be in a different situation. One that allows them to understand the sadness but not to the point where you are just bouncing the same struggles off of one another. Sometimes it is good to have someone who knows exactly what you are going through though. But for that I would seek out someone who has already survived it and not someone who is going through it. If that makes sense.

Basically different people have different needs. And different situations all for different approaches.