I actually wrote my thoughts about it on other site and I am too lazy to type it all out again so I'll just repost lol

If you ask me who loved whom more I'd say that in the very beginning, where it was a crush at first sight and so much denial and so many miles to go Effy maybe had a more strong rush of a feeling for him, because it was the first time when she ever fell in love and love was something new, vivid and scary for someone like Effy Stonem. Freddie was the kind of a guy that lets a feeling bloom in him and takes to get to know a person he has feelings for and become closer to this person. And I think at the point when they got together Freddie loved Effy more that she did him. And I also think, which is quite sad, but it explains why I like Freddie more than Effy - that she wouldn't be able to take care of him the way he took care of her, she wouln't risk her life for him or die for him. She loved him, as strongly as she could. But she didn't know how to deal with that feeling, I think one day, with Freddie's help she would have had learned how to do this and slowly worked out her issues, but the writers prefered to never explore it, leaving this girl with a tragic and sad statement that love will never end well for her. However, it doesn't erase everything this amazing couple had.