My Little ٹٹو Friendship is Magic Club
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
We find our hero Con Mane slowly walking through a hallway. It's dark, and the shadows block much of his face.

Con: *opens door*
P: Where is it?
Con: It's gone. We have an agent down.
P: Are آپ sure it's gone?
Con: *checks* It's gone.
Brosnan: *dying*
Con: *grabs cloth* Hang in there.
P: There's no time for that!
Con: I have to stop the bleeding!
P: Leave him!
Brosnan: Go! Don't worry about me.
Con: *leaves*
Snow: *drives truck* Let's drive.
Con: *gets in* Did آپ find Vetrice anywhere?
Snow: *looks* There. In the white Limo. *driving close to building* Whoops, I smashed a mirror.
Con: It's alright, آپ weren't using it.
Snow: *smashes other mirror* I wasn't using that one either.
Vetrice: *drives faster*
Con: He's seen us, floor it
Snow: *goes faster*
Vetrice: Shoot them!!
terrorist 1: *shoots truck*
Con: Allow me *grabs steering wheel*

With terrorists still shooting at Con, he slammed the truck into the limo, causing it to crash into a fruitstand.

Police: *riding motorcycles*
Vetrice: *shooting cops*
Con: *shoots at Vetrice*
Vetrice: *steals bike*
Con: Hmmm. *takes another bike*
Snow: What about me?
P: What's happened?
Snow: Con's chasing Vetrice on a motorcycle! *drives*

Vetrice was riding fast, but a truck was blocking his path. He soon rode inside a building up a flight of stairs. Con did the same, and was catching up.

P: Con, what's happening?
Con: I'm right behind Vetrice on سب, سب سے اوپر of houses!
P: آپ know what's at stake. We can't lose the manifest of agent's names!
Con: I'll get it!
Vetrice: *goes through window*
Con: *follows*
Snow: *driving on highway*
taxi driver: HEY! Mare's aren't allowed to drive, I'm calling the cops!
Vetrice: *Gets on highway*
P: Where are they?
Snow: On the other side of the highway, I'm getting close to them. *blocks road*
Vetrice: *stops*
Con: *riding towards Vetrice*
Snow: Surrender!!
Vetrice: No thank آپ *jumps on train*
Snow: آپ gotta be joking.
Con: *jumps onto train*
P: Where are they now?
Snow: On a train.
P: What do آپ mean on a train?
Snow: Are آپ deaf? They're on a train!
P: Well go after them!
Snow: *drives*
Vetrice: *shoots gun*
Con: *avoids*
Vetrice: *reloads*
Con: *shoots at Vetrice*
S: We're losing their signal. Widening range.

One of the cars on the train had a bulldozer, and four cars. It was behind three passenger cars, and Con, and Vetrice were both on there.

Vetrice: *shooting gun*
Con: *shoots last bullets, then throws away gun*
Vetrice: *shooting at Con again*
Con: *enters Bulldozer*
Snow: *driving alongside*
Vetrice: *shoots Con*
Con: *knocks cars off train*
Snow: *avoids wreckage*
P: What was that?
Snow: Fillys Equestricars. I think.
Vetrice: *shoots coupling*
Con: *puts arm on roof*
Snow: That bulldozer can't hold on to the train forever Con, اقدام it!
Con: *gets across*
P: What did آپ do?
Con: Switching trains. *walks to ladder*
Vetrice: *waits*
Con: *climbs to roof*
Vetrice: *hits Con*
Snow: The two are fighting on سب, سب سے اوپر of the train.
P: Tell us as much as آپ can.
Snow: آپ oughta know they're going into a tunnel.
Con & Vetrice: *lay low*
Snow: *stops on hill*

The train came out of the tunnel once Snow got her رائفل set up.

Snow: I may have a clean shot.
Con: *kicking Vetrice*
Snow: I don't have a clean shot
P: Can't آپ get a different view.
Snow: There's not enough time, I can't shoot this guy.
P: Take the shot.
Snow: I can't, I might hit Con.
P: Take the shot now!
Snow: *shoots rifle*

Which one fell? It was Con. Snow was saying she didn't have a clean shot, but she had several chances, but failed.

The 13th Con Mane story, called Slycall is now starting.

In this, is

Doughnut Joe as Con Mane
Snowflake as herself
Vetrice as himself
Pinkie Pie as P
Parcival as himself
Sydney P. Johnson as S
Missaqua88's OC (Don't know it's name) as Blu
Heckler as himself
Anthony as Con Mane's uncle
Koreans as bad ponies.

It was a rainy دن in Canterlot, یا should I say night. P was on her computer typing something for several hours ever since Con Mane was shot to death.

Commander Con Mane was a wonderful agent. Though he got careless in a couple of his assignments, most of them were done with precision, and a razor sharp mind.

That was as far as P could go, until she decided to go to bed. It was 11:30 PM when she stopped. She'd work on it again when she woke up.

The اگلے morning, P had to ride to a place in Canterlot, where she would be talking with another pony.

At the building.

Parcival: I appreciate آپ coming here today P.
P: Not a problem. What are we talking about?
Parcival: I've had a chat with the princesses, and they think that آپ oughta retire. You've done an excellent job working for the CIE.
P: Who کہا my job was finished?
Parcival: We did. آپ really think آپ want to stay in control of the CIE?
P: Yes! I lost an agent, and I'll do anything to get him back.
Parcival: آپ should take this retirement with مزید dignity.
P: Fuck dignity. That's what got me to lose 0007. *walks away*

After the "Very good" meeting, Pinkie was on her way back to the CIE HQ

Driver: P? We're getting a strange signal coming from our laptop? What about you?
P: I got it too! Where's it coming from?
Driver: We can't tell! It says it's at Melvin Street, house number 32-
P: That's where our headquarters are!!
Driver: *goes fast*
Police: *blocking off bridge*
P: Oh for crying out loud! *walks toward cops* اقدام آپ shitheads! Don't آپ recognize the car?

Suddenly an explosion occured. And it came from the HQ of the Central Intelligence of Equestria.

At a ساحل سمندر, بیچ alongside San Franciscolt, there was a bar. At that bar, some ponies would play a game, where they would try to catch a scorpion, under a glass, after drinking بیئر in it.

Con: *sees scorpion*
crowd: He seems good so far
Con: *drinks beer*
waiter: Damn, that was quick
Con: *gets بچھو in glass*
crowd: YEAH!!!!!!!
news reporter: We interrupt our program of فلمیں at 3 to bring آپ important news. There was an attack on the CIE Headquarters in Canterlot.
Con: I have to go

Four hours later, at P's house.

P: *looks around*
??: *sitting*
P: Where the fuck have آپ been?
??: Enjoying death.
P: *turns on lights*
??: 0007 reporting for duty.
P: Why didn't آپ call me after a week of suviving a shot, and fall?
Con: آپ don't care for me, why should I have called?
P: Because I do care for you.
Con: Then why did آپ do what آپ did? Take the shot now?
P: I didn't want that manifest being lost.
Con: I was doing my job! One مزید punch, and he would be dead.
P: Whatever. We need آپ back.
Con: Do you?
P: Ja!! Now tomorrow, آپ have to take a test for reentering the CIE. Take it seriously.
Con: Whatever *drinking beer*
P: And stop acting like an alcoholic.

2morrow

Parcival: *driving to HQ*
Con: How is the rebuilding going?
Parcival: Not too bad. I just can't get over meeting you, the legendary 0007 for the first time.
Con: There's a first time for everything.

at the headquarters, Con had to take several tests in order to become an agent again for the CIE.

Here's how one of them went.

unicorn: I'm going to say some words. When I do, I want آپ to say whatever pops into your mind. Ready?
Con: Sure.
unicorn: مکئی
Con: Whatever pops into your mind.
unicorn: Card
Con: game
unicorn: White
Con: Paint
unicorn: Black
Con: N*gger
unicorn: Car
Con: Getaway
unicorn: Triple
Con: Oh seven
unicorn: Slycall
P: *watching*
Parcival: Why isn't he saying anything?
unicorn: Slycall
Con: Finished *Walks away*

After the tests were finished, Con's results were in P's office.

Con: *looks at glass dog* Out of all the things that were in your blown up office, and that thing survives.
P: It's a puppy!!! Anyway your results came through, and آپ passed.
S: Good work Con, but آپ had a perfect chance to not work here. Why did آپ throw it away?
Con: To save your ass.
P: Wunderbar. Now S, دکھائیں him what آپ have for him.
S: Oh yes. All this stuff is all you'll need really. First your gun. A specially modified Nambu pistol.
Con: What so modified about it?
S: It has 10 bullets per mag, and we got it coded to your hoof so only آپ can آگ کے, آگ it.
Con: Well that's the best way to prevent others from stealing guns.
S: And here's the other thing you'll need.
Con: What?
S: A transmitter. Turn it on, and we'll send reinforcements to your position.
Con: This is all آپ have for me?
S: What did آپ expect, an exploding pen?
Con: Had one, it wasn't too bad.
P: Now that آپ have your devices, it's time to breif آپ on your assignment.
Con: Breifing!! :D I hate breifings.
P: You'll have to go to Bangkok to get another chance at stopping Vetrice from killing every agent in the world.
Con: And after I do that?
P: After that, آپ find out who he's working for, and kill him.
S: Here is a passport, a ticket for a flight to Bangkok, and keys to a brand new Dodge.
Con: Thank you.

After the breifing, Con left for Bangkok. Once he got there, he saw Vetrice at the airport, and followed him.

Vetrice: *drives on main street*
Con: *follows*
Vetrice: *stops اگلے to building*
Con: *stops nearby*
Vetrice: *kills guard*
Con: *walks to building*

When Con got there, Vetrice was walking upstairs.

Vetrice was walking upstairs for a minute, then he got to his destination.

Con: What is he up to?
Vetrice: *sets up sniper rifle*
blue headed griffon: *Watching*

Snow: *packing bags*
P: آپ know where to go?
Snow: Yes. Why do آپ want me to watch after Con again?
P: He didn't really pass his test.

Vetrice: *loads gun*
Con: *sneaks up*
Vetrice: *sees reflection on mirror*
Con: *kicks Vetrice*
blue headed griffon: *runs*
Vetrice: *shoots window*
Con: *takes gun*
Vetrice: *hits Con*
Con: *hits Vetrice with gun*
Vetrice: *falls toward broken window*
Con: *pushes Vetrice*
Vetrice: *goes over ledge*
Con: *grabs vetrice*
Vetrice: eehh
Con: *takes manifest* Who are آپ working for?!
Vetrice: *losing grip*
Con: Tell me, and you'll live!!
Vetrice: *falls* IT'S A MEXICAAAAAANNN!
Con: A mexican. That's a lot of info.

After Vetrice died, Con told P about what happened. He was told to go to a casino in Bangkok, and find a griffon there.

At the casino

Snow: *waiting*
Con: What are آپ doing here?
Snow: They're making me watch آپ if I wanna stay in the field.
Con: I'm ready this time *walks to cashier* I'd like to cash in these chips that I stole.
korean mare: *speaking korean* Here *gives Con $88,000*
Con: Thank you.
Snow: آپ doing some gambling?
Con: Hell yes.
Blue Headed Griffon: *watching*

Three korean ponies suddenly walked in. What did they want?

After Snow got her revenge on Con, she went back to HQ. As for Con, and Blu, they were on a کشتی heading to Maredagascar.

Blu: Will آپ be able to save me?
Con: *turns on transmitter* I believe so.

When they arrived the town was deserted. The only ponies on the streets were Con, Blu, 7 koreans, and a mexican ٹٹو walking toward them.

Heckler: Hola everypony.
Con: I assume that a ٹٹو named Vetrice was working for you.
Heckler: You're correct, but how?
Con: I killed him, and he told me it was a mexican.
Heckler: Let's talk somewhere a little مزید private shall we?

There was a warehouse اگلے to them, so they went in there.

Heckler: So آپ killed someone working for me.
Con: Yes. I take it that you're mad at me for doing this.
Heckler: Extremely. He was very good. We often had parties on this island before his most حالیہ assignment.
Con: Which was?
Heckler: To assasinate every agent in every organization.
Con: About this island of yours. What's so special about it?
Heckler: I remember visiting this place when my grandmother lived here. When I did there would always be these rats infecting the place. We didn't go out to hunt them, what we did was set up a trap. First we dug up this hole, and we set a trap for all the rats to go into. We trained them to do nothing, but eat each other. Soon, there were only two rats left, and they suddenly ate each other. سے طرف کی the time they were all dead, my grandma told me "That's the best way to get rid of a species nopony likes."
Con: Is that you're interest?
Heckler: I wouldn't consider murder to be an interest so no. I'm مزید into raping little fillys. What is your interest?
Con: Ressurection.
Heckler: Then you'll love this. Follow me *walks*

The two stallions went to a part of the island where Blu, and the koreans were waiting. Blu was hurt badly.

Blu: Please save me.
korean 1: Shut up.
Con: I will.
Heckler: Bring the mare to that rock over there.
korean 1: Let's go *drags Blu to rock*
korean 2: *brings box*
Heckler: *opens box* Hope آپ like civil war weapons.
Con: *takes Flint Lock*
korean 2: *puts cup on Blu*
Heckler: آپ first
Con: (I don't wanna shoot her) *Misses*
Heckler: Now it's my turn. *Shoots Blu* I win
Con: No shit.
Heckler: And now, it's time for your death.
Con: *shoots koreans*
Heckler: *shoots other korean*
Korean 4: What did آپ kill him for?
Heckler: I was aiming at Con
Con: Yeah, I'm right here.
Heckler: Then stay there.
Con: Sure. After all there are some ponies that will be here to get me off this island.

A few سیکنڈ after he کہا that, three helicopters arrived at the scene.

Heckler: Where did they come from?
Con: *shows transmitter* It's called technology. Learn the ways of modern life.

The ponies in the helicopter then took Con, and arrested Heckler.

At the CIE HQ, Heckler was waiting in a glass cylinder in a large square room. Con, P, and a few other CIE employees were in the same room with him.

Heckler: So what am I doing here?
P: Staying here until your death.
Heckler: That sounds dreadful.
Con: It sounds nice actually.
P: I have to go to a meeting soon. We better get going.
Parcival: Make sure he doesn't escape!
Con: *walks to S* Something tells me this guy has a plan to run. We'll need a few extra guards in here just in case.
S: Ok.
Snow: Hi Con.
Con: Oh, hey.
Snow: Sorry for abandoning آپ earlier.
Con: Whatever. That griffon I was with is dead if that helps.
Snow: Yay!

Everyone was so distracted talking to each other that they didn't notice Heckler breaking the glass.

S: Stop him!!
Heckler: *steals gun*
Con: I'm going after him
S: *gives con gun*
Con: Thanks. *runs after Heckler*
S: *goes to lab*
Heckler: *goes underground*
Con: *follows*
S: Ok. Heckler is heading toward a train station. There's a bunch of subways that go through this town. You'll have to find him before he gets on any train.
Con: I know *goes to door* It's locked.
S: Well use your unicorn magic یا something.
Con: *magically opens door* آپ happy?
S: That was cool to watch.
Heckler: *goes into office*
cop: Hey! آپ can't enter here!
Con: *heres gun shots*
S: We lost sight of Heckler, you'll have to find him on your own.
Con: Great. *sees Heckler* I see him. He's dressed as a police officer.
S: There's another ٹٹو similar to him. He may be on the train.
Con: Well then I'm getting on.
S: Wait, he's not on there.
Con: Make up your mind! The train's going to leave soon!
S: He's not on
engineer: *drives train*
S: He's on! GO!
Con: *runs to train*

The unicorn kept running until he jumped on the back.

old pony: Well, he's keen to get home.
Con: *knocks on door* Open the door please.
mare: *looks out window*
Con: Open! The door!
mare: *opens door*
Con: Can't your gender do anything right? *walks to Heckler*
engineer: *stops at station*
Heckler: *walks off train*
Con: *follows*
Heckler: *runs to exit*

At P's meeting

Judge: Good morning everypony.
everyone: Good morning Judge Juli.
Judge: We are all forced to be here, because of a ٹٹو that refuses to give up her job as controller of the CIE.
everyone: so what?
Judge: We are now going to hear why this ٹٹو won't give up her job.
P: I won't give up my job, because I'm wunderbar at it. Though some are concerned of my personality, most are concerned of a german running an Equestrian organization.
Heckler: *steals car*
Con: *Runs*
P: It does not matter where someone is from, as long as they are good ponies. Unless they're from a terrorist country like Saddlearabia, I am دوستوں with everypony.
Heckler: *arrives*
Con: *arrives*
P: Germans are our allies, let one run your organization.
Heckler: Not anymore *shoots at P*
Parcival: *jumps in front of bullet* He shot my leg.
Heckler: آپ moved in the way!!
P: *KO's Heckler*
Parcival: آپ got him.
P: Ja. Get the police to deal with him. *runs to car*
??: *drives*
Parcival: WAIT!!
P: *sees driver* 0007, what the fuck are آپ doing?
Con: Kidnapping you.
P: Excellent!
Con: I was being sarcastic

It was dark, as a car stopped at a shed. Con walked out, while P just stood there.

P: If that's the building I'm hiding in, I won't go.
Con: We're switching cars. The trouble with company cars is that they can be tracked, but not what I have. *opens door*
P: *notices car*
Con: Get in *starts car*
P: *gets in*

Pretty soon, they were driving on the streets of Canterlot.

P: Well the ride seems uncomfortable.
Con: *shows eject button* Are آپ going to complain the whole way?
P: Eject me. See if I care.

Parcival: P, and Con have gone missing.
S: We can't seem to find them.
Parcival: Damnit. Where could they possibly be?

In a quaint town, ten miles from Fillydelphia Con stopped. He was staring at a river.

P: *wakes up* What is it?
Con: We're close to my birthplace.
P: I thought آپ were born in Ponyville.
Con: That's what everyone thought about you, but you're from germany.
P: Ja.
Con: We better continue on. *gets in car*

For another mile they drove, until they got to a mansion that کہا Slycall.

Con: *stops* This place used to belong to my parents, but they died when I was a colt. Now my uncle owns all this.
P: Who is your uncle anyway?
Anthony: *walks out* Con Mane!! What a pleasure to see آپ again
Con: Good to see آپ too uncle *hugs Anthony*
Anthony: Hello there. Who might آپ be?
Con: That's Pinkie Pie.
P: آپ weren't supposed to give up my name!!
Con: He's my uncle.
Anthony: So what brings آپ here?
Con: Some ponies are trying to kill us. We're going to kill them.
Anthony: Let's see what we have. *walks in*
Con & P: *follows*
Anthony: Here's your father's old rifle. He had to use this during World War 2, and killed a lot of Nazis in Robotnik's army.
Con: Excellent.

The two stallions went to try it out.

Con: *shoots can* Shoots good.
Anthony: Yup.
Con: But I think آپ shouldn't be in this fight.
Anthony: Try and stop me آپ goddamn overconfident cunt.
Con: Alright. Let's do some spring cleaning

It was dark outside when they got everything ready. During that time, 45 mexicans came in trucks.

Mexican pony4: Where is he?
Mexican pony32: No clue.
Con: *hiding in car*
Mexican pony34: Let's open the door
Con: *shoots mexicans*
Mexican pony32: *gets inside*
Mexican pony4: Half of آپ inside that house, the other half, get the ٹٹو hiding in the car!
1st half: *goes inside*
2nd half: *shoot at Con*
1st half: Oh look, lights that aren't on!
P: *turns lights on*

There weren't just lightbulbs in there, but shotgun shells. They hit the mexicans once the lights turned on.

Anthony: Let's see how they like some of this *grabs Springfield*
Mexican pony21: *shoots at Anthony*
Anthony: *shoots mexican in the eye*
مزید mexicans: *shooting at Con*
Con: *shoots mexicans*
mexicans: Keep shooting!
Con: *runs inside*
Mexicans: *shoot door*
Con: That was close
Anthony: *shoots mexicans*
Con: Nice shot
Anthony: Thanks.
P: I hear a helicopter!
Heckler: *flying chopper*

The song مزید then a feeling was playing while Heckler was making his entrance

Con: Always have to make an entrance.
Heckler: *jumps* Are they dead?
Mexicans: No.
Heckler: Come out come out where ever آپ are!
Con: Take the escape route.
Anthony: Ok. We'll go
Heckler: *notices car* He's in there. Shoot him
mexicans: *blow up car*
Con: Motherfucking fucker *lights fuse*
mexicans: Get in there!
Con: *goes through escape route* I always hated that place
Heckler: Helicopter, pick me up!
mexican pilot: *goes lower*

Suddenly, an explosion occured. 400 lbs of dynamite were detonated in the house, which made a huge explosion!

pilot: I'm losing altitude! *crashes*
Anthony: Was that Con who did that?
P: I sure hope not.

P, and Anthony were walking to another building nearby. Far back, was Con. Heckler, and a few mexicans were following him

Heckler: There's Con, deal with him!
Mexicans: Yes sir!
Heckler: I'll get P, and the other pony.
Mexicans: *shoot at Con*
Con: *shoots a mexican*
mexicans: *walk on frozen lake*
Con: *shoots hole in ice*
Mexicans: *fall through ice*
Con: *continues*
P: *goes into church*
Anthony: *follows*
Heckler: *enters church* Of course. You'd end up in a spiritual place to try and kill me.
Anthony: *walks from bathroom* I didn't find any-
Heckler: *shoots wall* That's enough, thanks.
P: *backs away*
Heckler: You're hurt! What have they done to you? *gives P gun* You'll have to kill the both of us. Do it!
Con: *shoots Heckler*
Heckler: Why you..... Fucking motherfucking fucker!
Con: *kills Heckler*
P: What took آپ so long?
Con: A دکھائیں on ice.
P: *lays on ground*
Con: Don't die P.
P: It's best if آپ let me.
Con: There has to be another way. آپ can go into hiding!
P: Ja. *falls asleep*
Anthony: She's dead now.

اگلے morning at the CIE HQ

Snow: Wow. A nice view of the city.
Con: I agree, and the قلعہ can be seen not far from here.
Snow: Yeah, you're right. *shows box* P wanted آپ to have this.
Con; *opens box* It's that glass dog, great.
Snow: آپ better follow me. *walks*
Con: *follows* Did آپ become an agent again?
Snow: Yeah, but I decided to do something else instead. So now, you're safer.
Con: What's your name anyway?
Snow: I'm Snow. Snow Moneybit.
Con: 0007, یا just Mane. Con Mane.
S: 0007? He'll see آپ now.
Con: *walks into office* How's the leg sir?
Parcival: It'll be alright. آپ did well with your گزشتہ assignment.
Con: Thanks.
Parcival: Now then. Let's get back to work.
Con: With pleasure P. With pleasure

13 stories, and counting Con Mane will return

Special thanks to
Alinah09, and Missaqua88 for lending me their OC's.
Aston Maretin for the DP5

The End
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