I'm not very good with writing but I wanted to try and express my feeling about getting the heartbreaking news yesterday afternoon about Ms. Carrie Fisher's passing.

This celebrity death hit me hard, it was like I lost a family member, it was like I've known her, even though I've never meet her, she's been a part of my life since I was 8 years old, just hard to believe she's gone. Yes, as an 8 سال old boy, she was my first crush, even if I didn't realize it. I grew up with her, she was always Princess Leia to me, yes I've seen her in other films, but she was always Leia. She set the standards for female heroes in film, she was the 1st, well the 1st to me.

I'm still kind of in shock, still don't want to accept it, still getting teary eyed while watching the films. Why do I feel stupid for feeling this way? Like I said, I didn't know her, why do I hurt? It's just hard to explain, I know some would say "you didn't know her, get over it". So am I stupid for feeling like this? I just can't explain it. Sorry if this is not worded very well, like I said, I'm not a writer and I have never been good with wording my feelings.