Edward picked me up at eight the following morning, since we had a bit of a walk ahead of us.

"Got comfy shoes on?" He asked as I got into the car.

"My پسندیدہ sneakers." I replied.

"Good." He pulled out of the driveway and headed north on the one-oh-one, CCR's Have آپ ever seen the rain on the stereo. After a while, we turned onto the one-ten, and drove until it turned into a small, dirt road. He stopped, and I could see a hiking trail disappear into the woods ahead of us.

We got out of the car, and he pulled two backpacks from the trunk, handing one of them to me.

"This one's only got a couple of blankets and some water for you." He took the other bag. "I've got the heavy stuff."

"What exactly is in that?" I wondered.

"More water, some food. I thought we could have a picnic, since it does take a while to get there." He headed off towards the trees to the right of the road.

"Where are آپ going?" I asked nervously, glancing over at the trail in front of the car.

"We're not taking the trail." He told me, reaching out for my hand. "Come on, I won't let آپ fall."

And he didn't. We advanced through the forest slowly, and he held all the intruding branches and ferns out of my way. I knew I was slowing him down with my clumsiness, but he never once complained.

After an گھنٹہ the sun was starting to make me sweat, and I stopped to pull my sweater off. I was glad I had put on a t-shirt underneath it, since the دن was getting hotter سے طرف کی the minute. Edward followed my lead and took off his sweater too, and then we continued.

At noon, I stopped for another water break and a breather. We weren't walking very fast, but I still wasn't used to the rough terrain. The water chilled my throat in a pleasant way.

"Are we there yet?" I wondered, trying very hard not to sound too much like a whiney child.

"Are آپ five?" He countered, smirking at me. "But yes, we are almost there."

We continued for another ten minutes, and then we suddenly broke through a thicket of bushes, and stepped out into a completely circular meadow, covered with white and purple wild flowers.

"Wow." I looked around. "This place really is amazing."

"I'm glad آپ like it." He continued to the middle of the meadow, where he stopped and put his backpack down, reaching out for mine. I walked over and shrugged the bag off my shoulders, handing it to him.

"I can see why آپ like to come here."

He pulled a couple of blankets out of my backpack.

"I thought we'd better bring a couple extras, in case the weather guy was wrong, but I don't think we'll need them." He looked up at the almost completely blue sky before spreading one of the blankets on the ground. From the other backpack he extracted a couple of water bottles, two large tuna sandwiches and a plastic bowl of strawberries.

"Oh, strawberries, nice." I sat down Indian style on the blanket, and he joined me.

"Hungry?" I realized that I was, and he handed me one of the sandwiches. "Courtesy of Esme."

"Remind me to thank her later."

We sat in silence as we ate the sandwiches.

"So آپ and Emmett just stumbled upon this place?" I asked a little while later, popping a سٹرابیری, اسٹرابیری into my mouth.

"Pretty much." He stared into the distance for a while. "We did a lot of hiking when we first moved here."

I noticed a change of tone in his voice, and I realized that this was him broaching the previously avoided subject of their اقدام to Forks almost two years earlier.

"This was the first place I actually felt at peace here." He continued. "Emm was so intent on keeping me occupied; he never realized that doing just that was what made me uncomfortable in the first place."

"Why was he trying to keep آپ occupied?" I was afraid to ruin the moment we were having, but I still felt the need to ask. He sighed.

"I might as well start from the beginning." He was quiet so long that I almost thought he had changed his mind, but then he continued. "Junior high, I really had no interest in girls, یا they in me for that matter. I focused on school, and that was fine سے طرف کی me.

"The summer before high school, I grew about a foot and finally got rid of the braces that had been haunting me for years. I got some looks from girls that summer, but was still surprised when a girl at our new school, Tanya, showed an interest in me a couple of weeks into my freshman year. Emmett was all excited, talking about how she was a sophomore and one of the most مقبول girls in school. I was flattered, I guess."

So here it was then. The ex-factor.

"We started hanging out. I felt completely out of place with her friends, they were all cheerleaders and football players, but she made it easier. I thought I was in love with her. Of course, looking back, I get that it was just the attention she gave me.

"I knew that she and her دوستوں smoked, but it wasn't until she offered me one – which I stupidly took – after a couple o weeks, that I realized that they weren't smoking cigarettes."

He paused and looked at me, as if to read my reaction. I tried to keep my expression blank, and after a moment he continued.

"You know what they say about peer pressure. I wish I could say that I کہا no as soon as I realized what it was, but I didn't. I desperately wanted her approval, so I thought I'd just give it a try. That couldn't hurt, right?"

He laughed dryly.

"She had complete control of me after that. Her dad was one of the richest guys in LA, but he traveled a lot, so his way of دکھانا his love for his daughter was to give her money whenever he was actually home. She spent it on drugs for both of us.

"Pretty soon, she moved on to heavier stuff, and I of course followed her. I still don't know how I managed to keep Carlisle and Esme from finding out what was going on, یا how I managed to not completely mess up in school, but somehow I did. And they had no idea.

"One night in May, Tanya got hold of some syringes and wanted to try injecting instead of snorting, which was what we had been doing up until then. As always, I went along with whatever she said. And I OD'd."

I let a frightened gasp escape, and he looked away.

"Luckily, she had the presence of mind to actually call an ambulance, یا I don't know what would have happened. I don't remember anything, of course, but they brought me to Carlisle's hospital. I will never forgive myself for what I did to him and Esme, یا my brother and sister for that matter, that night. I'll never get over that. But I obviously survived.

"They shipped me off to a rehab centre in northern California. I spent two months there, and when I got out, they had already moved here. Carlisle gave up a great job at Cedars-Sinai, Esme started working from home, and Emmett and Alice had to switch schools – all because of me. "Removing the temptation" Carlisle called it. And I was glad, because I knew I would never be able to be around Tanya without getting dragged back into her world."

He played with a blade of grass, his eyes on the ground.

"They never blamed me, for what I had done یا for forcing them to leave everything they had worked for. Never کہا that they were angry یا disappointed. They just helped me get better, and never talked about it again."

I finally got the movement back in my limbs, and put my arms around him in what I hoped was a comforting hug. He held on to me like his life depended on it.

"I haven't scared آپ away?" He mumbled after a moment.

"Of course not. Did آپ think that آپ would?" Was that why he hadn't کہا anything about all of this before?

"Honestly, I'm waiting for آپ to run away from me, screaming." A small smile was visible on his face, and I knew the hard part was over.

"I love you, silly. It's going to take a lot مزید than that to scare me off." I realized what I had said, and my دل almost stopped.

"I love آپ too, مزید than آپ could possibly know." He held me even tighter.

After a moment, he pulled away a little, only to lean down and kiss me with a desperation I had never felt before. It was like he was drowning and I was the oxygen he needed to survive. I returned the kiss with as much feeling, and shifted a little in his embrace so I was in his lap.

The kiss became even مزید passionate, and after a moment we both pulled away, grasping for air. The look in his eyes told me that he wanted to take this to the اگلے level as much as I did, and I decided that it was time.

I reached up to kiss him again, and as he deepened the kiss, I brought my right hand down from where it had been resting around his neck and started unbuttoning his shirt. He pulled away, his hand closing around my wrist, stopping my actions. My دل dropped.

"I don't have…" I silenced him with another kiss, and felt myself start to blush as I pulled a condom from the back pocket of my jeans. I didn't know what had made me stuff it in my pocket that morning, but I was glad that I had.

I pulled back and put the little foil wrapper in his hand. He raised an eyebrow at me.

"I'm surprised at you, Isabella Swan." He smirked. "Were آپ planning to seduce me today?"

"Rose." I mumbled, getting even redder, and lowered my eyes.

"I should have known." He placed a finger under my chin and forced me to look at him before he kissed me again.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed myself even closer to him, getting a groan in return.

"Do آپ know what آپ do to me?" He mumbled against my lips, and it was my turn to smirk. I shifted in his lap so I could لپیٹ, لفاف کریں my legs around his waist.

"I think I might have an idea."

He pulled back from me and looked me deep in the eyes, his own dark with desire.

"Are آپ sure? Because if we take this any further, I don't know if I could stop."

"I don't want آپ to."

He stared into my eyes me for an infinite moment, before leaning down and covering my lips with his again. I took this as a silent permission to continue my گزشتہ actions, and I resumed my mission of getting his شرٹ, قمیض unbuttoned. When I had successfully undone the last button, he quickly shrugged the شرٹ, قمیض off and tossed it aside. I tentatively ran one hand down his now exposed chest, and he moaned into my mouth. I let my wandering hand continue down to his jeans, where I tugged at his belt. Again, he grabbed my hand and pulled away from me. For a moment, I thought that he'd changed his mind, and I looked away, embarrassed.

"Did آپ think you'd get away with keeping all your clothes on, undressing me like that?" He chuckled, and I looked back up at him, relieved. He had my favorite, crooked smile on his lips.

"Sorry." I mumbled.

"Don't worry, I'll fix it." The smile disappear and he suddenly looked very serious again as he reached down, grabbed the hem of my t-shirt and lifted it over my head. When he had removed it, it went in the same general direction as his شرٹ, قمیض had a moment earlier. The sun warmed my back and chased the slightly cool air away from my skin.

As his eyes roamed over my body, I felt myself blush again.

"Beautiful." He mumbled, leaning down and placing a kiss on my shoulder, in the hollow of my throat, my کالر bone. When his tongue grazed the skin there, I inhaled sharply, letting my head fall back under the pleasant sensation.

His hands, in the meantime, were wandering up and down my back. After a moment, they paused at the clasp of my bra, and I froze. He immediately moved away from the spot, his hands coming to rest on my waist. He pulled away from my neck and gave me an apologizing look.

"Sorry."

"No, it's OK." I mumbled. "I was just… caught a little off guard."

"You don't have to." He assured me, leaning down and placing a soft kiss on my lips.

Instead of trying to argue my case, I took the matter into my own hands, reaching behind me to unclasp my bra. I avoided his eyes as I let it slip off my shoulders.

"Look at me." He placed his hands on my cheeks and pulled my face up so that I didn't have a choice but to meet his eyes. "You don't ever have to be embarrassed in front of me, ever. OK?"

I nodded, and he kissed me again; harder, مزید eagerly this time. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed myself against him, skin to skin. He ran his hands up and down my sides, his thumbs brushing the sides of my breasts briefly before returning back down.

I moaned at the loss of contact when his lips left mine, and he chuckled a little as he trailed light kisses down my chin, neck, کالر bone, chest… when his tongue circled my right nipple, I gasped. Pleased with the reaction, he repeated the action on the left one before returning the way he had come, finding my lips again.

I could feel the آگ کے, آگ inside me, which had been burning steadily ever since he had first kissed me, become even warmer, and impatiently reached down to tug at his بیلٹ, پٹی again. He replied سے طرف کی swiftly picking me up and laying me down on the blanket, covering my body with his own. Our lips crashed together and our tongues danced, but I was far from satisfied. Again, I attempted to unbuckle his belt, and this time, I was successful. I got as far as pulling the zipper down before Edward pulled back.

"Hey!" I complained, but he just chuckled at me.

Quickly unbuttoning my jeans, he pulled them off in one, تیز رو, سوئفٹ motion. His own jeans quickly went the same way, and he grabbed one of the spare blankets from the گھاس اگلے to us before reclaiming his گزشتہ position above me.

"Nobody ever comes here, but there's no need to give any possible wanderers a show." He mumbled against my lips, and I was suddenly very aware of where we were.

I glanced around the meadow. There was no way anyone would see us unless they actually came into the clearing; we were very well hidden from the surrounding woods. But still…

"What if someone does come here?"

"Don't worry." He frowned. "We can leave if آپ want to, we don't…"

"No." I cut him off quickly.

"Are آپ sure?"

I pulled him down for a kiss to prove my point, and he willingly let the subject go.

There was still a few inches of space between us, because he was supporting his weight on his knees and elbows, so as not to crush me. Wanting – needing – مزید contact, I experimentally wrapped one leg around his waist and pulled his body against mine.

"God, Bella." He moaned against my mouth, and I smiled inwardly. I could feel how hard he was against me, and knowing that I had that kind of effect on him was very satisfying – unfortunately, though, only on a mental level. Wanting a مزید physical kind of satisfaction, I let my hands wander down his back and tugged at his boxers.

He immediately pulled away from me to be able to remove my underwear. In what I could only assume was a sudden notion of embarrassment, he then turned his back on me to remove his own. I was actually a little glad that he did; though I did want this مزید than anything, I was starting to feel a little nervous. When I heard him tearing the foil packet with the condom open, I felt the color rising in my cheeks. I closed my eyes, trying to get the unwanted blush under control.

"What did I tell you?"

I opened my eyes when I heard his voice inches from my ear.

"Don't ever be embarrassed." He repeated, kissing me softly.

"I'm not, I'm just a little… nervous." I admitted.

"You don't have to be. I would never do anything that آپ didn't want me to do." He pulled away a little, and my entire body protested. "Just say the word, and we'll stop."

"I don't want to stop." I pulled him back down on سب, سب سے اوپر of me. "I want this, I want you, so much."

"Not half as much as I want you." He mumbled, kissing the side of my neck.

"More."

"Not possible." I could feel him smiling against my skin.

I pulled my left leg up, bending the knee, so that I could مزید easily press myself closer to him. I heard him let out a ragged breath before his lips covered mine again. I returned the fervent kiss with as much passion.

His right hand slid between our bodies, wandering down, down… when I felt him slip one finger inside me, I gasped into the kiss, my body arching into his touch as if سے طرف کی its own will.

He pulled away from me, again trailing kisses down my neck, chest. His lips encircled one of my nipples, and he pulled it into his mouth.

"Oh, God!" My eyelids slid shut and I felt my breath become مزید labored. My hands tangled in his hair, trying to keep him from ever stopping what he was doing.

I was only aware of the red light behind my eyelids, the feeling of Edward's warm mouth on my breast and the movement of his finger inside me. The entire world could come to a flaming end around us, and I wouldn't have noticed.

After a تقسیم, الگ کریں سیکنڈ – یا an eternity – his lips wandered back to mine and his finger slipped out from inside me. I instantly arched my hips, in تلاش of something to ease the آگ کے, آگ that was now burning blazing hot inside me.

He ended the kiss, pulling back from me a little. His breath was coming in ragged gasps, just like mine, and if I could have heard his heart, I had no doubt that it would have beaten as fast as mine did.He shifted a little above me, and I felt him position himself at my entrance."I don't want to hurt you."I didn't know what to say to that, so I arched my hips a little, pulling him a fraction of an inch inside me."Tell me to stop if…"I nodded at his unfinished statement.His eyes didn't leave mine as he slowly, almost painfully so, pushed deeper inside me. When he got to the barrier protecting my virginity, he stopped for a moment before quickly thrusting all the way inside.I squeezed my eyes shut and bit my lip against the piercing pain, and he instantly froze inside me."I'm sorry." He mumbled, placing soft kisses on my eyelids, nose, forehead, cheeks.The pain only lasted a moment. When it had ceased, I opened my eyes to find him anxiously looking down on me."I'm OK." I assured him, experimentally moving my hips a little. The groan I got in return assured me that I was doing something right.His lips descended on mine, and I felt him pull almost completely out of me before pushing back inside. The new sensation was almost overwhelming, and I gasped into his mouth. He froze again, afraid of having hurt me, and pulled away from the kiss."No, don't stop." I mumbled, pulling his lips back down to mine.Having been assured that he wasn't causing me any pain, he started moving again, pushing into me slowly. I bent my other knee to be able to meet his thrusts better, and the new angle made both of us moan."God, آپ feel so good." He mumbled against my lips, picking up the pace a little.His left elbow was supporting his weight so he wouldn't crush me under him, and his right hand slipped between us. He cupped my left breast for a moment before letting his thumb tease the nipple. The feeling made me gasp again, and I felt tension starting to build up inside me.His thrusts were becoming faster, deeper, harder, but it still wasn't enough for me"Please, I need…" I trailed off, not knowing what it was that I wanted.He somehow understood my plea, though, because his hand deserted my breast and slipped further down between our bodies to where they were joined together. As his finger grazed the sensitive nub there, I felt the tension inside me increase even more."That's right, just let go." He mumbled, his thumb replacing his finger. As he pressed down, I felt something explode inside me. Colors flashed behind my closed eyelids, and it felt like my entire body was convulsing, but in a very satisfying way. My mind became completely blank, all energy focused on the intense pleasure originating in that one part of my body and spreading to all the others; my legs, feet, toes, arms, hands, fingertips… everywhere.It took me a moment to come back down to reality, to become aware of the fact that Edward was still moving inside me, the feeling of his lips still on mine. Wanting him to feel everything I had just experience for the first time myself, I met his thrusts with even مزید passion. After only a few moments, he froze, and I could feel him quiver inside me. He leaned his forehead against mine, and we lay there as he started coming back down, our breathing slowing in synch.After a few minutes, I felt him slip out of me, but he didn't pull away. Instead, he rolled us around so that I was lying on سب, سب سے اوپر of him and pulled the blanket tight around me. I snuggled into the crook of his neck and he kissed the سب, سب سے اوپر of my head."I love you." He mumbled quietly."Love آپ too."