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Here are my فہرست of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let آپ know now i got alot of these from the youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything یا eating anything آپ might spit it یا something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the جھاڑو late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the خلیج, کھاڑی they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's پسندیدہ vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the مشروم, کھنبی have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do آپ call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do آپ call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do آپ make an octopus giggle ten times?
آپ give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do آپ make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's پسندیدہ composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between آپ and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't آپ hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher کہا it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the ٹماٹر blush?
It saw the ترکاریاں, سلاد dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do آپ know if it's raining cats and dogs?
آپ step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do آپ know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do آپ get pikachu on a bus?
آپ pokémon (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't آپ dress with pikachu in the room?
He'll pikachu (peek at you)

#27 What do آپ call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
آپ boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton پار, صلیب the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do آپ call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's گلابی and fluffy?
گلابی fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
گلابی fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when آپ drink 7 coca colas?
آپ burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the مچھلی say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't آپ trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope آپ liked them. Make sure آپ check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
 PewDiePie
PewDiePie
posted by Windwakerguy430
Hello everyone and welcome to the اگلے half of In-Indie. I was able to binge a whole lot of new indie titles to get this out and boy, do we got some greats and some… not so much. But we’re here to talk about not just a great, but one of the best. A game that many online are calling the Dark Souls of the indie scene…. Wait, that’s not rig- Hollow Knight, everybody.



So yeah, this is a game that many would compare to Dark Souls and I would as well, but not for the reasons a subhuman, like, a video game journalist, would call this a Dark Souls game. Yes, the difficulty is there, which...
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added by DeiJambastion
Source: Meh
added by SilentForce
added by ShadowFan100
added by tanyya
Are آپ bored? Do آپ have the humor of a 10 سال old boy? Do آپ like موسیقی that doesn't have a real point? Do آپ like موسیقی that will make your grandma look at آپ with disappointment in her eyes!? If آپ answered yes to any of these سوالات then here is a فہرست for you. Swigity Swoogity here comes موسیقی about that booty!

Black Eye'd Peas - My Hump
Big Sean - Dance
Jason Derulo - Wiggle
Dev - Booty Bounce
Bubba Sparxxx - Mrs New Booty
I Can't Wait For The Booty (Disney/Mrs New Booty)
Under The Booty (Disney/Mrs New Booty Mashup)
John دل - Who Booty
Ugly God - Booty From A Distance
Ugly God -...
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added by ace2000
added by australia-101
added by t_direction
added by australia-101
added by tanyya
#10: TRIXIE'S FUNHOUSE:
This is at the bottom of my list, because its not nearly as bad as people say it is.
By this point, I am use to hearing stories about rape.
I review bad Alpha and Omega stories.
And the stories involved have everything from incest to turning cute characters into out of control sluts. MLP fairs no better sadly.
And I usually know what I'm getting myself into.
Truth is, Trixie is kinda attractive for pony, and the pervert side of me would probably 'let' her do such things to me.
But, we can't ALL be freaks like me, so. I guess I would recommend NOT reading this story, ever!...
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added by 3xZ
Source: disneyscreencaps.com
added by 3xZ
Source: disneyscreencaps.com
added by 3xZ
Source: disneyscreencaps.com
posted by Precious7732
(Music starts)
آپ and I found love in the dark,We made up wildfire from the start
My demons wash it away like prints in the sand
And I wish I could turn back the time just to feel آپ again
'Cause I would burn a thousand miles,To be with you
my wildire... (fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire)
My wildfire...
(Music starts) (wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiild)
(oh oh oh ohhhhh,oh oh oh ohhhhh,oh oh oh ohhhhh,oh oh oh ohhhhh)
آپ got me,free falling through the sky
آپ take me,to a different kind of high
My demons wash it away like prints in the sand
And I wish I could turn back the time just to feel آپ again
'Cause I would burn a thousand miles,To be with آپ my wildfire...(fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire,fire)
My wildfire...
(Music starts) (wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiild)
(oh oh oh ohhhhh,oh oh oh ohhhhh,oh oh oh ohhhhh,oh oh oh ohhhhh)
(Music starts to end)
posted by GDragon612
If آپ have 3 quarters, 4 dimes, and 4 pennies, آپ have $1.19. آپ also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.

President Kennedy was the fastest random speaker in the world with upwards of 350 words per minute.

Odontophobia is the fear of teeth.

The 57 on Heinz ketchup bottles represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once had.

It is believed that Shakespeare was 46 around the time that the King James Version of the Bible was written. In Psalms 46, the 46th word from the first word is shake and the 46th word from the last word...
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added by Dreamtime