I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.

Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.

A man was complaining to a friend: 'I had it all - money, a beautiful house,a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was all gone!' 'What happened?' asked the friend. 'My wife found out..'


Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if آپ get ہوم before I do, leave the hallway light on.

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened سے طرف کی the time she brings it to the couch.

A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, 'Martha, pack up your things! I just won the California lottery!' Martha replies, 'Shall I pack for warm weather یا cold?' The man responds, 'I don't care. Just so long as you're out of the house سے طرف کی noon!'

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the سٹریٹ, گلی bald and still think they are beautiful!

I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and آپ had to choose, would آپ go to lunch یا to a movie?

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.