Here are my فہرست of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let آپ know now i got alot of these from the youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything یا eating anything آپ might spit it یا something.)
#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.
#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)
#3 Why was the جھاڑو late to work?
It overswept!
#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the خلیج, کھاڑی they'd be bagels.
#5 What's Michelle Obama's پسندیدہ vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)
#6 Why does the مشروم, کھنبی have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)
#7 What do آپ call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)
#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
#9 What do آپ call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!
#10 How do آپ make an octopus giggle ten times?
آپ give him ten-tickles (tenticles)
#11 How do آپ make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!
#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!
#13 What's a chicken's پسندیدہ composer?
Bach!
#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between آپ and me man, something smells." (Your nose)
#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."
#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."
#17 Why can't آپ hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)
#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher کہا it was a piece of cake.
#19 Why did the ٹماٹر blush?
It saw the ترکاریاں, سلاد dressing.
#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)
#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)
#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.
#23 How do آپ know if it's raining cats and dogs?
آپ step in a poodle (puddle)
#24 How do آپ know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)
#25 How do آپ get pikachu on a bus?
آپ pokémon (pok 'em on)
#26 Why can't آپ dress with pikachu in the room?
He'll pikachu (peek at you)
#27 What do آپ call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)
#28 How do get holy water?
آپ boil the hell out of it!
#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD
#30 Why didn't the skeleton پار, صلیب the road?
He didn't have the guts to.
#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)
#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)
#33 What do آپ call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator
#34 What's گلابی and fluffy?
گلابی fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
گلابی fluff holding it's breath.
#35 What happens when آپ drink 7 coca colas?
آپ burp 7up
#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.
#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!
#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.
#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)
#40 what did the مچھلی say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!
#41 Why can't آپ trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)
Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope آپ liked them. Make sure آپ check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
(Make sure your not drinking anything یا eating anything آپ might spit it یا something.)
#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.
#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)
#3 Why was the جھاڑو late to work?
It overswept!
#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the خلیج, کھاڑی they'd be bagels.
#5 What's Michelle Obama's پسندیدہ vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)
#6 Why does the مشروم, کھنبی have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)
#7 What do آپ call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)
#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
#9 What do آپ call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!
#10 How do آپ make an octopus giggle ten times?
آپ give him ten-tickles (tenticles)
#11 How do آپ make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!
#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!
#13 What's a chicken's پسندیدہ composer?
Bach!
#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between آپ and me man, something smells." (Your nose)
#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."
#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."
#17 Why can't آپ hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)
#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher کہا it was a piece of cake.
#19 Why did the ٹماٹر blush?
It saw the ترکاریاں, سلاد dressing.
#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)
#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)
#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.
#23 How do آپ know if it's raining cats and dogs?
آپ step in a poodle (puddle)
#24 How do آپ know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)
#25 How do آپ get pikachu on a bus?
آپ pokémon (pok 'em on)
#26 Why can't آپ dress with pikachu in the room?
He'll pikachu (peek at you)
#27 What do آپ call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)
#28 How do get holy water?
آپ boil the hell out of it!
#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD
#30 Why didn't the skeleton پار, صلیب the road?
He didn't have the guts to.
#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)
#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)
#33 What do آپ call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator
#34 What's گلابی and fluffy?
گلابی fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
گلابی fluff holding it's breath.
#35 What happens when آپ drink 7 coca colas?
آپ burp 7up
#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.
#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!
#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.
#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)
#40 what did the مچھلی say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!
#41 Why can't آپ trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)
Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope آپ liked them. Make sure آپ check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
Death came to a guy and said: "My friend today is your day."
Guy:"But I'm not ready!"
Then death said,"well your name is the اگلے on my list".
Guy:"Okay why don't آپ take a نشست and I will get آپ something to eat before we go?".
Then death said,"all right"
The guy gave death some food with sleeping pills in it, death finished eating and fell into a deep sleep.
The guy took the فہرست and removed his name from the سب, سب سے اوپر of the فہرست and put it at the bottom of the list.
When death woke up he کہا to the guy, "Because آپ have been so nice to me, I will start from the BOTTOM of the فہرست ..."
Moral of the story: - Whatever is written in your destiny ... Will never change no matter how much آپ try!!
Guy:"But I'm not ready!"
Then death said,"well your name is the اگلے on my list".
Guy:"Okay why don't آپ take a نشست and I will get آپ something to eat before we go?".
Then death said,"all right"
The guy gave death some food with sleeping pills in it, death finished eating and fell into a deep sleep.
The guy took the فہرست and removed his name from the سب, سب سے اوپر of the فہرست and put it at the bottom of the list.
When death woke up he کہا to the guy, "Because آپ have been so nice to me, I will start from the BOTTOM of the فہرست ..."
Moral of the story: - Whatever is written in your destiny ... Will never change no matter how much آپ try!!
A stoner called the آگ کے, آگ department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" The Fireman asked "How do we get there?" The stoner says "DUH, the big red truck!"
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I appreciate every single person here, and despite my being very moody at times, I will always care for those who feel the same towards me :D
I noticed that I've been very...unpleasant on Fanpop towards some people, and I apologize for that. All I could say was that I was in the Darkest Time of my life, and it consumed me entirely. But now, that will change >:)
I am me again. I love and respect those who have always been there for me, were kind to me, are my fans, and appreciate each and every one of آپ for the rest of my life :)
I love آپ all! Have a beautiful, wonderful دن :D