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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom: *Standing in front of a house dressed as Santa Claus*
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Hey, آپ finally laughed in the beginning for once. Thanks for taking my advice.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Please explain to us why we're dressed as Santa Claus.
Tom: We are dressed like him, because it was on Aina's Christmas List. We can't dissapoint her.
Master Sword: Oh, I forgot. However, we got مزید important news.
Tom: Yes. In the گزشتہ episode, we forgot to announce the brony of the month.
Audience: *Booing*
Master Sword: Yes. I know. We suck.
Tom: I don't. Anyway, December's Brony of the ماہ goes to Purrloinedlove. She made a club dedicated to our comedy series, and for that, we thank her.
Audience: *Cheering*
Master Sword: We're becoming famous!!
Tom: Alright, shut up, and concentrate.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Today's crossover parody, Kawaii Five-0.
Master Sword: I think آپ know where we're going with this.
Tom: In case آپ don't know, it's a crossover of عملی حکمت with Hawaii Five-0.
Audience: *Laughing*

Kawaii Five-0

Tom Foolery as Steve McGarrett
Master Sword as Danny Williams
Double Scoop as Chin Ho Kelly
Snow Wonder as Kono
Aina as Mio from K-ON
Astrel Sky as Kadotani from Girls Und panzer ہے, جیجہ
Cosmic قوس قزح as Ash from Pokemon

At Hawaii, the Five-0 team was at headquarters.

Steve: Everypony, we got a problem.
Danny: Oh no, a problem! Why are we here again?
Audience: *Laughing*
Steve: There's a virus going around turning Hawaiians, and asians into عملی حکمت characters.
Chin, and Kono: AH! *Hiding behind desk* Don't let it hit us!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Steve: It's okay. The virus is very difficult to get, but it is contagious.
Chin: What are our chances of getting it?
Danny: Slim to none? O%? Who cares?
Audience: *Laughing*
Steve: I do, but you're correct about the 0% thing.
Kono: What a relief.
Chin: Yes, this عملی حکمت virus thing is scary.
Kono: No, I mean I just farted.
Audience: *Laughing*

Meanwhile, three ponies that got the عملی حکمت virus were planning to rob banks.

Mio: We need مزید money!
Ash: How are we going to get it?

Theme Song: link

Kadotani: Not now! The crossover parody ain't finished yet! *Turns off song*
Audience: *Laughing*
Mio: Now with that out of the way, we are going to rob banks.
Kadotani: But our characters have nothing to do with bank robbing. Yours has something to do with music. Mine has something to do with teaching mares how to drive tanks, and kill each other.
Audience: *Laughing*
Kadotani: *Points at Ash* And آپ just teach these multi colored animals to fight. What's the point in robbing banks?
Mio: We need money to turn back into normal.
Ash: I don't want to turn back normal. I think I look badass.
Mio: Bad, yes. The other thing, I'm not so sure.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mio: Now let's do this.

On some random road in Hawaii

Steve: *Driving Danny's car*
Danny: I wish for once, آپ would either let me drive, یا follow me around in your redneck vehicle.
Steve: Just because I have a truck, doesn't make me a redneck.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mio: *Crashes into Danny's car* Outta my way assholes!
Steve: عملی حکمت characters.
Danny: No wonder why she's a terrible driver. آپ know, Asians. Mares.
Audience: *Laughing*
Steve: *Chasing Mio*
Mio: Ash, Kadotani, take them down!
Ash: Hayo, mayagama, goku! *Shoots a Kamehameha*
Audience: *Laughing*
Steve: *Avoids the Kamehameha*
Danny: Nothing will work in this thing except for good old fashioned bullets. *Shoots tire on Mio's car*
Mio: *Crashes into tree*
Kadotani: Ow!
Mio: *Points at Ash* I blame you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ash: Me? I'm not the one that was driving!
Steve: *Stops اگلے to Mio's car*
Danny: *Looks at everypony in Mio's car* آپ idiots are going to pay for damaging my car.

But barely any damage was on his car. It was just a scratch on the left door.

Audience: *Laughing*
Steve: آپ three are underarrest.
Ash: We didn't do anything.
Danny: آپ hit my car, and try to kill us with some lazer thing. آپ don't think we know what آپ were trying to do?
Kadotani: Correction, we know آپ don't know what we're trying to do.
Ash: We were supposed to be robbing a bank.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mio: Way to go Ash hole.
Audience: *Laughing*
Danny: This just proves to دکھائیں آپ that عملی حکمت characters, and عملی حکمت in general sucks.
Audience: *Laughing*

The End

On the اگلے part of this episode

Astrel Sky has a bad day.

Theme Song: link

Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on سٹریٹ, گلی corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing اگلے to Double Scoop*
Tom: مزید ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands اگلے to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
Astrel Sky: *Appears out of nowhere with magic*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*

Episode 9: That Doesn't Answer My سوال

Astrel Sky was heading to the store to try, and buy some gifts for her friends.

Astrel Sky: *Walking to store*
Store Worker: *Holding flyers* Come one, come all! god that's getting old.
Audience: *Laughing*
Store Worker: To Walmart's December Black Friday Sale. Everything is under a dollar.
Ponies: Did someone say Black Friday?!!?
Audience: *Laughing*
Astrel Sky: Uh oh.

Astrel Sky got pushed aside سے طرف کی the big group of ponies, rushing past like a high speed train.

ٹٹو 38: This is my TV!
ٹٹو 93: I'm getting it! There's another one just like this, آپ get it!
ٹٹو 38: It's got a white stain on it!!
Audience: *Laughing*
ٹٹو 84: *Grabs boardgame* I need this!
ٹٹو 37: *Takes boardgame from pony* I need it مزید than you!
ٹٹو 84: *Takes his game back* آپ need it less than me.
ٹٹو 37: *Gets punching دستانے, دستانہ out of nowhere, and punchers Pony*
Audience: *Laughing*
Lyra: *Sees a pair of hands* At last! I can wear something on my hooves that will make me look like a human!
Audience: *Laughing*
ٹٹو 62: *Takes hands*
Lyra: *Her mouth drops on the floor*
Audience: *Laughing*
Astrel Sky: This is too chaotic. *Finds a microphone* Thank آپ random microphone for appearing out of nowhere in my time of need.
Audience: *Laughing*
Astrel Sky: *Talks into microphone* Attention everypony!!

Everypony stopped fighting, and listened to Astrel Sky's voice boom over the PA system.

Astrel Sky: What you're doing is pathetic, and dangerous. Fighting over things. Just things! Only because the price is reduced. That is immature, and unsafe. All of آپ should know better. Even on days if it's not Black Friday, prices for things get reduced, and nopony fights about that. So why does it only happen on Black Friday? I'm only gonna tell آپ once. Please, have enough common sense, and common courtesy to not kill each other.
Ponies: آپ know what? She's right.
Store Owner: *Takes mic from Astrel Sky* Give me that! This is for employees only. *Talks into Mic* Attention everypony, forget what she just said. Get back to what آپ were doing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ponies: *Fighting*
Astrel Sky: *Shakes her head no, and walks out of the store* Black Friday. I'll never understand the shit آپ make everypony go through.
Audience: *Clapping*

Bodyshop Ponies

Starring Sophie Shimmer as Wheel Bearing
Heartsong as Dainelle DeVito
Snow Wonder as Cutlass Supreme
Tom Foolery as Gary
Mortomis as Mr. Beddler
Pleiades as زیتون
Master Sword as Tim
and Annie as Edwina

It has been an entire week since anypony got to work on any cars. However, Mr. Beddler had news that would put a smile on their faces.

Mr. Beddler: Who likes those musclecars from the 60's?
Edwina: Me!
Olive: I do!
Wheel Bearing: I think I speak for everypony when I say yes.
Gary: آپ think آپ speak for everypony?
Wheel Bearing: What? آپ don't like musclecars?
Gary: It's not that, but when آپ کہا you'd speak for all of us, آپ were the only one talking.
Audience: *Laughing*
Wheel Bearing: That's the point.
Mr. Beddler: Alright, I can only have a limited ammount of ponies work on this car. It's a '68 Nova, and I need to know who's going to work on it.
Gary: I will.
Tim: If he's working on it, so am I.
Mr. Beddler: Perhaps آپ two should start dating.
Audience: *Laughing*
Gary: *Looks at audience* We're not laughing. So why are you?
Audience: *Laughing*

The Nova was behind the دکان about to wait for entry, but the driver was intoxicated.

Drunk Pony: Eeh, I feel like I'm driving a prius instead of a nova.
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Pony: *Floors it*

Slow motion time.

The drunk ٹٹو hit another car, causing him to go airborne. It went over a garbage dumpster, with the bottom scraping on it.

This was the sound being made سے طرف کی the scraping on the dumpster: www.mediafire.com/listen/odyspw55tmz19p7/brakes+squeal.mp3

Play it from 0:02, to 0:05.

Tim: What was that?
Drunk Pony: *Looking at his car* It's ruined! I blame that car for being in my way! *Points to the car he hit, which is actually parked perfectly*
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Pony: I blame the dumpster کی, ڈمپسٹر for scraping the bottom of my car!
Tim, and Gary: *Arrive*
Drunk Pony: And I blame آپ two for not fixing this car!
Gary: آپ just damaged it.
Tim: Give us some time to fix it.
Drunk Pony: Too late! I am taking my business elsewhere. *Gets in his car, and crashes into a small shed*
Audience: *Laughing*
Gary: Seems like he's going to be fixing stuff for us instead.
Tim: Not only the shed, but those tools inside it.
Gary: And Mr. Beddler's car. The one he hit in the parking lot.
Audience: *Laughing*

A new skit has arrived

The Movie Studio

Starring

Blaze as Director Nick
Astrel Sky as Roxy
Saten Twist as Connor
Tom Foolery as Louis
Cosmic قوس قزح as Tobias "Toby"
Sunny as Alinah
Double Scoop as Mason
And Aina as Leah

This takes place in the Roaring Twenties, a few years before the start of the great depression. یا to be مزید specific, Ninety twenty f**king five!

Audience: *Laughing*
Louis: *Walking to school* I only have five days left.. As well as another school year.
Audience: *Laughing*
Bullies: *Chasing Louis* We're gonna get you!
Louis: Uh oh! *Running away from bullies*
Bullies: He's getting away!
Louis: I know this is ninety years in the past, but... *Grabs teleporter* Deus ex machima, activate!
Audience: *Laughing*

Louis teleported into Los Angeles.

Louis: It worked!! Now what should I do? I know, I'll do what everypony does when they arrive in L.A. Go to Applewood, and work on movies!
Audience: *Laughing*

So while a jazz band was playing, Louis got in a taxi, and went to the MGM studios in Applewood.

Connor: Director Nick, what do we do now?
Director Nick: I want all of آپ to prepare for the اگلے scene.
Leah: Is that all?
Director Nick: No. I also want آپ to shut up!
Audience: *Laughing*
Louis: *Arrives* Hello? Is there anypony here working on movies?
Director Nick: *Walks to Louis* Who the f**k are you?
Louis: My name is Louis. What's yours?
Director Nick: Director Nick.
Louis: Fury?
Audience: *Laughing*
Director Nick: What do آپ want?
Louis: I want a job in movies.
Director: A job huh?
Louis: Any job. It doesn't have to acting, and I don't care how much آپ pay me.
Director Nick: There's a first.
Audience: *Laughing*
Director Nick: How would آپ like to work on props?
Louis: How do آپ do that?
Director Nick: Go to the سہارا room, and find something!
Louis: Okay! *Runs quickly, and returns with a sword*
Director Nick: Where did آپ find that?
Louis: Oh, somewhere.

In another studio.

Actor: I can't be a knight without a sword!
Audience: *Laughing*
Director: Do آپ think I care? Let's keep rolling!

Back to Louis, and Director Nick.

Director Nick: I didn't explain enough to you. This movie takes place in the Great War.
Louis: *Looks around studio* I don't see any trenches, یا mortars.
Audience: *Laughing*
Director Nick: That's because it takes place when Connor's character is on leave. Find his gun!
Louis: *Goes to سہارا room, and returns with a Tommygun* Here آپ are cheif.
Director Nick: Wrong wrong wrong! They didn't have those until '22.
Louis: Twenty two what?
Audience: *Laughing*
Director Nick: For the love of... I give up, get outta here.

But something, and someone will prevent Louis from leaving the movie business. Find out in the اگلے episode when another Movie Studio skit will arrive.

Coming up اگلے is The Story Of Corporal Agarn.

The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic قوس قزح as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy

Everypony was celebrating Christmas at Fort Courage.

Corporal Duffy: *Opens present* A hundred bucks?
Sargent O' Rourke: Do آپ like it?
Corporal Duffy: No!
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Duffy: Back at the Alamo, I got much مزید gifts then these lousy one hundred dollars!
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Vanderbilt: *Walks away*
Corporal Agarn: *Opens present. It's a book, but he doesn't know what it is* Will آپ look at that?
Sargent O' Rourke: *Looks at Agarn's present* What is it?
Corporal Agarn: I don't know.
Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: That's a book Agarn. Let's see what kind of present I got. *Grabs present, and looks at it* Uh.
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: Something wrong Captain?
Captain Parmenter: I don't know how to open this.
Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: *Pulls on bow*

The bow squeezed the box, and جیلی came out.

Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: Well, at least we know what's in my present.
Corporal Agarn: But آپ destroyed it!
Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: True. Oh well, آپ can't win them all. *Throws box towards door*
Corporal Vanderbilt: *Opens door, and walks in* ارے guys- *Slips on box, and lands on ground*
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: Are آپ alright Vanderbilt?
Corporal Vanderbilt: *Stands up* Never better Parmenter.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: I'm O' Rourke. To the right is your Captain.
Corporal Vanderbilt: *Turns right, but doesn't stop until he faces the door he walked through* Hi Captain!
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: Where did things go wrong with that young stallion?
Audience: *Laughing*
Ponies: *Singing* Though he goes on a rage from time to time, he is a very good friend of mine. And in Fort Courage he is well known as, Corporal Agarn.
Dobbs: *Playing the بگل, قرنا poorly*
Corporal Agarn: I'm warning آپ Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*

The rest of this episode has been recorded in black, and white.

"And welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy." کہا Alex, "I'd like to once again apologize for the lack of color in this episode, but we ran out of money."

The audience laughed at this unfortunate event, and Alex continued, "With that said, let's take a look at the scores. Twilight Sparkle is in first place with negative $82,300."

Laughter, clapping, and cheering could be heard from the audience members as Twilight said, "Yo, what's good niggas?"

"Wooooh!!" Cheered the audience.

"I'd appreciate it if آپ didn't say that word ever again." کہا Alex.

"But I'm black, I got the right to say whatever the f**k I want! Your just a racist bastard!"

The audience laughed, and clapped at the same time after hearing what Twilight just said.

"Okay," کہا Alex, "In سیکنڈ place with negative $82,400 is Rarity, the element of generosity."

Cheering could be heard as Rarity started to speak.

"I hope آپ don't mind me bringing my cat here, she just gets very lonely without me."

"That's... Fine." کہا Alex, "And finally, Sean the hedgehog is here with negative $120,000, a new jeopardy record."

The audience laughed, and cheered at the same time.

"Stick it up your پچھواڑے, گدا Alex, یا better yet, let me stick it up your grand daughter's ass!" Shouted the hedgehog.

مزید laughter was heard, and Alex was embarrased, "Let's just اقدام onto double jeopardy. The categories are...."

Potent Potables
How many eyes do آپ have?
The letter that comes after B
Automatic points

"That's where آپ automatically get points for buzzing in." informed Alex.

As the audience laughed, Alex continued on with the categories.

Superheroes that are also Captains
US/Japan Relationships
And finally, videogames سے طرف کی Nintendo

The audience laughed again. When they stopped, Alex said, "Rarity, we'll start with you."

The white unicorn replied سے طرف کی saying, "I'll take masturbation for 1000." This made the audience whistle, laugh, and clap at the same time.

"How many eyes do آپ have for 400. Good choice." کہا Alex.

As the audience laughed, Alex said, "And the answer is, this is how many eyes آپ have."

Sean buzzed in.

"Sean?" Asked Alex.

"I don't know about yours, but your grand daughter has one that looks nice, and big."

The audience laughed once again.

"That's eyes, not ass." Replied Alex.

Rarity buzzed in, and before she gave Alex a chance to speak, she said, "I've got a nice ass. Who here wants to f**k me on stage right now?"

The audience started cheering, and shouted me! Once the noise died down, Alex said, "The correct answer was two. آپ have two eyes. Twilight Sparkle, will آپ pick a category?"

The purple alicorn looked angry, and said, "Why do ponies today need to curse with their mouth?"

This caused some ponies in the audience to laugh, and Twilight continued, "We should be setting an example for the young ponies. All they do is walk around listening to rap music."

مزید laughter aroused from the audience, and Twilight continued talking, "That is why they lie, cheat, and steal!"

"Let's just go with Automatic points for 1,000." Replied Alex, and the audience let مزید laughter come out of their mouths. "As I کہا earlier, all آپ have to do is ring your buzzer, and آپ automatically get 1,000 points, hence the name of the category."

However, no one rang in, and the audience laughed while clapping.

"You are all idiots." کہا Alex, "Sean, why don't آپ pick a category?"

"I'll take US/Jap Relations for 600." کہا Sean. The word jap is offensive, and made the audience laugh.

"If you're trying to recreate Pearl Harbor, آپ might succeed." کہا Alex in a disgusted tone. مزید laughter came from the audience, and Alex said, "US/Japan Relations for 600, and the answer is, This is what caused the US to become allies with Japan in 1945."

Rarity quickly buzzed in, and shouted, "Hentai! عملی حکمت porn!" The audience laughed, and clapped at the same itme.

"I can't deal with this anymore, final jeopardy." کہا Alex. "The category is your پسندیدہ letter in the alphabet."

As the audience laughed, Alex continued to speak, "There are twenty six letters آپ can choose from. Just go for whichever one آپ want. It could be an A, یا a B. یا how about a C?" The audience laughed again, and Alex said, "I have a feeling آپ three will get this right, but just in case, I'm going to have my hooves crossed."

The timer rang, and they were out of time.

"Okay, let's see what آپ wrote down." کہا Alex. He looked at Twilight's podium, "Twilight, آپ wrote down, the letter N. آپ wagered, igga."

The audience laughed, clapped, cheered, and whistled.

"Freedom of speech nigga! I can say whatever da f*q I want!" Shouted Twilight, causing مزید laughter to come from the audience.

"Right." کہا Alex, and looked at Rarity's board. "Moving on. Rarity wrote down.. Nothing, and wagered, twenty five dildos."

The audience laughed, and cheered.

"I had to wager something related to sex." Replied Rarity. The audience clapped, and Alex said, "I hope آپ die."

As the audience laughed, Alex walked over to Sean's board. "Mr. The Hedgehog, آپ wrote down, the letter F."

"I sure did. آپ did tell us to write down our پسندیدہ letter."

"Fantastic. آپ did very well." کہا Alex, "Let's see your wager."

The wager was shown, but Alex looked uncomfortable looking at it. Laughter, clapping, cheering, and whistling was heard from the audience. "You just had to write that down."

"I could say it out loud." کہا Sean. The audience laughed, and Alex said, "Show's over. Goodnight, and merry Christmas."

The End

STH/AM6663 Entertainment. Copyright, 2014
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see.
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see.
added by MrOrange16
Source: funniest.1000notes.com
added by Sprinter23
added by Tamar20
added by lloonny
added by Hot_n_cold
Source: weheartit.com
added by xxXsk8trXxx
added by Ilovebaxter
added by TizzFan4evr
E-mails, text messages, voicemails- آپ name it, we’ve got it. Technology has created many creative and wonderful ways for us to keep in touch with each other, as well as make our lives easier at the same time. With our busy schedules, it is not always easy to keep in touch with دوستوں and family the way we would always like to. The days of sitting down and having a nice, long phone conversation seems like a memory of the past and is a rare thing to happen on a frequent basis these days. Not to worry though, because with E-mails and text messaging available, we are sure to keep in touch...
continue reading...
1. Ruin there پسندیدہ dress with lipstick
2.Slap them in the face with something alive
3. Make a bath for them with salt.
4. When they are at a fancy dinner, make fart noises
5. Run around them saying "Your butt is smelly!"
6. Say infront of everyone that your enemy watches Dora.
7. Fill a water ballon with سوپ and prank him.
8. Kiss her boyfriend right In front of her
9. Push her into a 20 ft pool. (Espicially if she can't swim)
10. Steal her wallet and spend all her money and use her credit card. (Or through it in the trash.)


All made up سے طرف کی me. ^ ^
I decided to create a فہرست of twenty of my personal favourite hard rock songs.

No AC/DC, people. I'm sorry.

1. "Highway Star", سے طرف کی Deep Purple
2. "Fear Of The Dark", سے طرف کی Iron Maiden
3. "Money For Nothing", سے طرف کی Dire Straits
4. "Sharp Dressed Man", سے طرف کی ZZ Top
5. "Come On Feel The Noise", سے طرف کی Quiet Riot
6. "Love In An Elevator", سے طرف کی Aerosmith
7. "Still Of The Night", سے طرف کی Whitesnake
8. "Nobody's Wife", سے طرف کی Anouk
9. "Stairway To Heaven", سے طرف کی Led Zeppelin
10. "Smokin'", سے طرف کی Boston
11. "Cherry Bomb", سے طرف کی The Runaways
12. "Mother, سے طرف کی Danzig
13. "Voodoo", سے طرف کی Black Sabbath
14. "Hot Blooded", سے طرف کی Foreigner
15. "Barracuda", سے طرف کی Heart
16. "Turn Up The Radio", سے طرف کی Autograph
17. "I Love آپ Period", سے طرف کی Dan Baird
18. "Rock & Roll 69", سے طرف کی Betty Blowtorch
19. "I Can't Drive 55", سے طرف کی Sammy Hagar
20. "Carry On Wayward Son", سے طرف کی Kansas
These are our rules! Please note ... these are
all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put
it down. We need it up, آپ need it down. آپ don't hear us
complaining about آپ leaving it down.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of
it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what آپ want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints
do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable جوابات to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you...
continue reading...
The city of San Francisco is asking Kulbir Dhaliwal, who was attacked سے طرف کی a tiger at the San Francisco Zoo on Christmas دن 2007, to reimburse them over $75,000 for the city-funded medical care he received after the mauling.
Cold viruses can survive on objects like telephones and railings for up to three hours.
More suicides occur in the Grand Canyon than in any other national park.
There are مزید bacteria in the ice machines at fast food restaurants than in toilet bowl water.
Alcohol-related traffic fatalities are مزید than twice as common on New Year's Eve as other midweek winter evenings.
Two...
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posted by Feathershine
1. When their watching TV get in their way and say "I'm in your way!! Im in your way!!"
2. Say "beep, beep beep..." until they snap
3. Call them on their cell phone when their out on a تاریخ یا something, and in a weird voice say "Hello?! Can I send u a box of waffles" (LOL I don't know)
4. When their sleeping take a bottle of water and wake them up سے طرف کی dumping it on them and saying "Sorry! I came to bring it for u to drink, I didn't realize it slipped"
5. If آپ have a dog یا cat (that DON'T sleep with your parents) dump him/her when there asleep
6. When آپ spill any liquid blame it on the gods
7....
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1.find something old and breakable and go up to a apartment یا building یا highest floor in your house and open a window and estimate how long it will take that thing to hit the groung then throw it out the the window and cout how many seconds/minutes it takes to hit the ground really.
2.go to wal-mart,enough said
3.go outside and try to sell a old stuffed animal on a leash to people who look important to society,like hobos
4.go to your neighbors and tell them they need to stop the rucus and to shut up your trying to sleep even if its the middle of the دن and they arent making any noise
5.go to...
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posted by x-menobsessed26
Useful Hawaiian Phrases
On the Plane
My how your perfume fills the entire cabin!
'A'ala maoli keia wahi o kakou i kau wai 'ala kuikawa!


If I snore, I would like to apologize in advance
Ke nono au, e kala mua mai, i keia manawa ho'i.


I am filled with admiration for my in-flight meal
Kahaha ko'u na'au i ke 'ano o ka mea 'ai ma keia mokulele.


Only six dollars for a headset? Why thats only three dollars per ear!
Eono kala no ka ho'olohe lekio? 'O ia ho'i, 'ekolu wale no kala o kahi pepeiao!


Baby, Severe Turbulance is my middle name
E ku'u kumu e, mai hopohopo, ua kapa 'ia ko'u inoa waena, 'o ia 'o Severe...
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posted by ciaraluvsjustin
1.Bring a pillow.Fall asleep[or pretend to]until the last 15 minutes.Wake up,say"Oh Geez,better get cracking"and do some gibberish work.Turn it in a few منٹ early
2.Get a copy of the exam,run out screaming "Andre Andre I've got the secret documents!!"
3.If it is a math/science exam,answer in essay form.If it is a long answer/essay form answer in numbers یا symbols.Be creative.
4.Make paper airplanes out of the exam.Throw them at the instructors left nostril.
5.Talk the entire way through the exam.Read سوالات out loud,debate your جوابات with yourself out loud.If asked to stop, yell out"I'M...
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"An old woman haunted me!"

One night my and سے طرف کی brothers and I were sleeping up stairs while my mom was downstairs reading. I was lying in بستر and heard this light stomping sound. Then the stomping sound got a little heavier. Soon, it became so loud that my brothers and I all came out of our room because we were scared. My mom had heard it too and she thought it was one of us playing a joke, but it wasn't - we were all in bed! We had no idea what to make of it and were really freaked out. But then, things got creepier....

"We found her stuff in the attic, her name was Tamara!"

I went over to...
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posted by jblovesme4ever
[]miley cyrus the girl who many of whom look up to but why[
resons to hate her(feel free to add مزید on comments)

1)[]her music]: she doesnt write it on her own and her newest song untamed wow the part where she says I GO THOUGHT BOYS LIKE MONEY:and the only good song she has is the climb: and that is not saying much!!!:patry in the usa wow that is the s&^%$#@ موسیقی vidio i have seen it a while

2)money: the only reson she is here is bcus she wants money: she has to get payed to do chairty events:and she is always just talking about it to

3)she doesnt care about her fans: she may say she doese...
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posted by deathchick9
Over the many years of pikachu,if آپ look closely pikachu has been getting thinner and thinner.When it started he was this cute,fat little chunk of Pokemon,but now he's a skinny little freak.Which can only me one thing....Ash has forced him to become bulimic!
*Dramatizations*
____________________________________
Ash:Jeez,Pikachu your so fat!

Pikachu:Pika?

________________________

Ash:Loose some weight آپ fat bastard!

Pikachu:Pika?!
_________________________________________

Ash:No stop eating!Your just gonna get fatter!

*Ash shoves his finger down pikachu's throat to make him vomit his food up.Pikachu...
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