Rules that guys wished girls knew..........
1. If آپ think you're fat, آپ probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see
if he can find the perfect present, again!
5. If آپ ask a سوال آپ don't want an answer to, expect an
answer آپ don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless آپ are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like
every other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon یا the changing of the tides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not sport.
12. Anything آپ wear is fine. Really.
13. آپ have enough clothes.
14. آپ have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if آپ must, but don't expect us to like it.
16. Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is an idiot and
your Dad probably is too.
17. Ask for what آپ want. Subtle hints don't work.
18. No, he doesn't know what دن it is. He never will. Mark
anniversaries on a calendar.
19. Yes, pissing standing up is مزید difficult than peeing from
point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.
20. Most guys own two to three pairs of shoes-what makes آپ think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
21. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
22. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
23. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.
24. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
25. Check your oil.
26. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
27. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
28. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz
together.
29. Anything we کہا 6 یا 8 months پہلے is inadmissible in an
argument. All تبصرے become null and void after 7 days.
30. If آپ don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
31. If something we کہا can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes آپ sad and angry, we meant the other one.
32. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty آپ are?
33. Don't rub the lamp if آپ don't want the genie to come out.
34. آپ can either ask us to do something یا tell us how آپ want it done- not both.
35. Whenever possible, please say whatever آپ have to say during commercials.
36. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
37. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
38. Consider Golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like
آپ do.
39. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are
airbrushed makes آپ look jealous and petty and it's
certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazines.
40. The relationship is never going to be like it was
the first two months we were going out.
41. Anyone can buy condoms.
If this offended any Girls throughout this‚ i'm sorry... but us girls should know this
1. If آپ think you're fat, آپ probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see
if he can find the perfect present, again!
5. If آپ ask a سوال آپ don't want an answer to, expect an
answer آپ don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless آپ are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like
every other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon یا the changing of the tides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not sport.
12. Anything آپ wear is fine. Really.
13. آپ have enough clothes.
14. آپ have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if آپ must, but don't expect us to like it.
16. Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is an idiot and
your Dad probably is too.
17. Ask for what آپ want. Subtle hints don't work.
18. No, he doesn't know what دن it is. He never will. Mark
anniversaries on a calendar.
19. Yes, pissing standing up is مزید difficult than peeing from
point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.
20. Most guys own two to three pairs of shoes-what makes آپ think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
21. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
22. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
23. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.
24. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
25. Check your oil.
26. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
27. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
28. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz
together.
29. Anything we کہا 6 یا 8 months پہلے is inadmissible in an
argument. All تبصرے become null and void after 7 days.
30. If آپ don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
31. If something we کہا can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes آپ sad and angry, we meant the other one.
32. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty آپ are?
33. Don't rub the lamp if آپ don't want the genie to come out.
34. آپ can either ask us to do something یا tell us how آپ want it done- not both.
35. Whenever possible, please say whatever آپ have to say during commercials.
36. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
37. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
38. Consider Golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like
آپ do.
39. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are
airbrushed makes آپ look jealous and petty and it's
certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazines.
40. The relationship is never going to be like it was
the first two months we were going out.
41. Anyone can buy condoms.
If this offended any Girls throughout this‚ i'm sorry... but us girls should know this
1.Favorite Color
Red-My tomato
Orange-My carrot
Yellow-My banana
Green-My broccoli
Blue-My taffy
Purple-My grape
Pink-My cotton candy
Black-My jellybean
Brown-My chocolate
2.Favorite Food
Pork chops-Sat on a
Jello-Bounced on a
Pancakes-Stepped on a
Spare ribs-Threw a
Rice-Squeezed a
Spaghetti-Destroyed a
Pudding-Chewed on a
Fries-Grossed out a
Chicken-Scared a
3.Favorite number
1-Bed sheet
2-Spaceship
3-Table lamp
4-Feather
5-Skyscraper
6-Balloon
7-Computer
8-Oven
9-Classroom
4.Favorite animal-
Gorilla-Because it was too fluffy
Bunny-Because it was too unorganized
Giraffe-Because it was too silly
Lion-Because it was too stretchy
Alligator-Because it was too beautiful
Sheep-Because it was too ھٹی, ترش
Dog-Because it was too bumpy
Cat-Because it was too hyper
Horse-Because it was too dirty
My انگور stepped on a میز, جدول lamp because it was too unorganized!
Red-My tomato
Orange-My carrot
Yellow-My banana
Green-My broccoli
Blue-My taffy
Purple-My grape
Pink-My cotton candy
Black-My jellybean
Brown-My chocolate
2.Favorite Food
Pork chops-Sat on a
Jello-Bounced on a
Pancakes-Stepped on a
Spare ribs-Threw a
Rice-Squeezed a
Spaghetti-Destroyed a
Pudding-Chewed on a
Fries-Grossed out a
Chicken-Scared a
3.Favorite number
1-Bed sheet
2-Spaceship
3-Table lamp
4-Feather
5-Skyscraper
6-Balloon
7-Computer
8-Oven
9-Classroom
4.Favorite animal-
Gorilla-Because it was too fluffy
Bunny-Because it was too unorganized
Giraffe-Because it was too silly
Lion-Because it was too stretchy
Alligator-Because it was too beautiful
Sheep-Because it was too ھٹی, ترش
Dog-Because it was too bumpy
Cat-Because it was too hyper
Horse-Because it was too dirty
My انگور stepped on a میز, جدول lamp because it was too unorganized!
Q: Why did the forgetful chicken پار, صلیب the road?
A: To get to the other side -- er, no -- to go shopping -- no, not that either -- damn it.
Q: Why did the redneck پار, صلیب the road?
A: He wanted to sleep in the ditch on the other side.
Q: Why did the one-handed man پار, صلیب the road?
A: To get to the سیکنڈ hand shop.
Q: Why did the turkey پار, صلیب the road?
A: Because he wasn't a chicken.
Q: Why did the fat turkey پار, صلیب the road?
A: To get hit سے طرف کی my car.
Q: Why did the woman پار, صلیب the road?
A: I don't know, but where'd she get shoes and what is she doing out of the kitchen?
A: To get to the other side -- er, no -- to go shopping -- no, not that either -- damn it.
Q: Why did the redneck پار, صلیب the road?
A: He wanted to sleep in the ditch on the other side.
Q: Why did the one-handed man پار, صلیب the road?
A: To get to the سیکنڈ hand shop.
Q: Why did the turkey پار, صلیب the road?
A: Because he wasn't a chicken.
Q: Why did the fat turkey پار, صلیب the road?
A: To get hit سے طرف کی my car.
Q: Why did the woman پار, صلیب the road?
A: I don't know, but where'd she get shoes and what is she doing out of the kitchen?
Ok let me tell آپ 14 resons how :3
Ok some of these pertend i'm a boy
1)Put your arm around a person آپ don't know
2)Then twirl another random persons hair and ask them if there going to the game tonight
3)Offer them hair
4)tell them about your period last night
5)tell them about the bird and the bees
6)rub your self against the teacher
7)look in to a random persons eyes and make a very weird face
8)showing your friend your dick
9)come to skool singing the barney song
10)talk to your friend and take off your wig and دکھائیں them your really miley cyrus
11)pick your nose and ask someone if they want a bite
12)rape a random person
13)start crying in the hall for no reason
14)JUMP!!!!!!!
Ok some of these pertend i'm a boy
1)Put your arm around a person آپ don't know
2)Then twirl another random persons hair and ask them if there going to the game tonight
3)Offer them hair
4)tell them about your period last night
5)tell them about the bird and the bees
6)rub your self against the teacher
7)look in to a random persons eyes and make a very weird face
8)showing your friend your dick
9)come to skool singing the barney song
10)talk to your friend and take off your wig and دکھائیں them your really miley cyrus
11)pick your nose and ask someone if they want a bite
12)rape a random person
13)start crying in the hall for no reason
14)JUMP!!!!!!!
