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1) Fetch it yourself jerkwad! آپ threw it, why should I have to go and get it?
2) Fetch this!
3) (after licking himself) "ha ha! آپ only wish آپ could do that!"
4) "That whole, 'Blame your farts on me,' thing is SO not funny."
5) Bacon, Bacon, I smell Bacon, Only one thing smells like بیکن and it's BACON!
6) One of these days... I'll catch that $%#& Squirel
7) Who's the b*tch now?
8) What is the air-speed velocity of an unlden swallow?
9) Hey, zipperhead, clean my water dish and I won't drink from the toilet.
10) Why dont آپ fetch your own newspaper!?
11) Dude, that Evil Lawn Gnome is creeping me out.
12) Let me tell آپ the secret to licking your own balls...
13) Gotta catch the tail... Gotta catch the tail... Gotta--
14) Ooh. I don't feel well. Barf... ارے look, مزید food!
15) Ohboy Ohboy A ball Throw me the ball C'mon throw me the ball
16) Frankly, grandma's breathe is worse than mine
17) I know it all Joe.Now I can tell your wife,or آپ can get me kibbles and bits.
18) Gimme some food, foo!
19) Please let me out BEFORE آپ change
20) Pushin' the rock Pushin' the rock Pushin' the rock
21) Why is it that I get stuck with kibble and آپ get steak?
22) Yeah. I can lick it. Jealous aren't you?
23) Mind if I use your couch?
24) So what if l lick my own balls? Try it, آپ might like it.
25) Yeah, I know it's just your leg, but I still don't care.
26) I don't care what the commercial says. IAMs کتے chow taste like puke!
27) Oh, I'll keep my silence-- for a price. How well do *you* beg, 'master'?
28) Would someone pry this 4 سال old away from me for heaven's sake!?
29) Why don't آپ ever lick your balls?
30) ارے Baby, Mind if I hump your leg?
31) I dont care how cute it is. No one's giving me a poodle haircut!
32) ****!!!
33) Drop Bush, not bombs!
34) Get your a** up and let me out
35) آپ cut my balls off, I'm going to kill you
36) bow wow wow yippy yo yippy yay
37) I told آپ to sell that Enron stock.
38) get a cat i dare you
39) I'm peeing ,,,can't I have some privacy
40) "Wear Corduroy pants so I can get better traction"
41) uhh... like, woof and stuff
42) It's not cheating if both the legs are on the same person.
43) Gimme some of them 'tater chips
44) To be, یا not to be.. That is the question.
45) I'll have one of what he's drinking
46) "F*** You! I'm leaving!"
47) Get away from my a*s.
48) Please don't sic your cat on me again!
49) Your knees smell.
50) This water's good, but nothing beats good ol' toilet water.
51) oh my god, the soap! it burns!!
52) Sorry, your leg پگھلانا, سودھنا just like Fifi اگلے door
53) dude, where's the phat blunt?
54) Get me a biscuit, *****.
55) can i please sit at the میز, جدول i promise i wont bite
سہارا to my friend, آپ know who آپ are, for the idea and the inspiration. Thank آپ so much, آپ are awesome :)

Perfection.
That's a word all of us have, یا will have, tried to accomplish. I'm pretty sure one of آپ out there's trying to be the سب, سب سے اوپر of the class یا سب, سب سے اوپر of your sports team یا getting the attention of someone یا trying to make your parents proud یا something. And I'm pretty sure once یا twice one of us has failed. We've all felt insecure at one point, felt misery, darkness and pain. We've all felt the need to take our lives away یا draw blood یا run away یا something of that...
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posted by karpach_13
Fake carsickness.

Lean back in your نشست on the person behind you.
Ask. Are we there yet? Every 5 Minutes.

Have arguments with someone in the car.

Stick your head out the window like a dog.

Sing with the radio loudly even if آپ don’t know the words.

Actually get carsick.

Play with every gadget آپ find in the car.

Have belching contests.

Accelerate and brake every 4 seconds.

Count to 10 before going at a stop sign.

Run a yellow light but change your mind while آپ still can.

Drive down the left turn lane.

Slow down when آپ see a sign that says, “bridge may be icy,” especially in the dead of summer....
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posted by cute20k
Im swimming through the shadows
Try to escape from my fears
It's okay I'm fine
Ignore my tears.


Im dashing down the never ending hall
They might as well paint my fears on the wall
Whose gonna catch me when I fall
When I trip
Over the darkness

And don't let my smile fool ya
Cuz im just too sad to cry and
On the inside I am dyin'

Its like Im dying in my sleep
Im slowly killed سے طرف کی my dreams
Just remember that everything's never as it seems..

I could cry but say everything's alright
I'll just smile to get through the night.

Everything may look like it's going okay
But u can look past my smile
And its like nothings...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
1. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

2. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

3. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted

4. Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case

5. Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents

6. Farmer Bill Dies in House

7. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms

8. Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?

9. Stud Tires Out

10. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope

11. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

12. Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again

13. British Left waffles کے, waffles on Falkland Islands

14. Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms

15. Eye Drops off Shelf

16. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids...
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added by 050801090907
added by r-pattz
Source: explosm.net
added by EgoMouse
Source: Google Image
added by 050801090907
added by tanyya
added by tanyya
added by tanyya
added by SkyheartPegasus
I seriously don't frickin know xD
video
canadiaderps
video
joan jett
awesome
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blackhearts
added by tanyya
LOL
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funny
random
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ok
This may be offensive to bisexuals. I think its mean, but I couldnt help but laugh.
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parody
hilarious
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added by marthatsal