Twilight Series Article: آپ Know You're Reading Twilight Fanfiction When...

5

آپ Know You're Reading Twilight Fanfiction When...

posted by pompeybabe

Lemons ... get it?

I found these on Tumblr ... thought they were funny (and pretty damn accurate).

This is a little graphic for those of آپ who shy away from this kinda stuff ;)

1. Bella is clumsy, shy and constantly bites her lower lip when she’s nervous

2. Edward finds her lip biting habits sexy

3. Edward is jealous, over protective and a bit controlling

4. Edward has a temper

5. Though there are no vampires and no werewolves, Human Edward can actually GROWL

6. Edward has the greenest eyes she’s ever seen and a panty dropping crooked smile

7. Edward always has velvety smooth, warm voice that turns to rough when he wants Bella

8. Bella has the deepest brown eyes and he can see to her soul through them

9. Edward has a monster cock that deserves an award and can put any other to shame ;)

10. Though some might think physically impossible, Edward can get hard in less than 3 سیکنڈ after seeing Bella only bite her lip

11. Tanya is a bitch

12. Rose is the coolest badass ever

13. Esme is always wiping tears from her eyes somewhere

14. Carlisle the kindest and most compassionate Doctor ever… unless you’re reading a SAVAGE story [Lorabell note: یا Emancipation Proclamation where he’s a straight up badass]

15. Unless it’s a sex marathon story یا a Dadward/Momella story, you’re gonna have to wait till they say “I love you” before sex

16. Edward always gets Bella to come only 2 سیکنڈ before him and both always happen explosively with white spots behind their eyelids

17. Alice is referred to as a pixie, loves Bella barbie and always takes her shopping against her will

18. No matter how long the story is یا what genre but you’ll ALWAYS find Edward in a towel somewhere with Bella there to drool over the V between his hips

19. Bella hates wearing heels, calls them “death traps” and they’re usually forced on her سے طرف کی Alice یا Rose

20. Edward has LONG fingers that can do wonders with موسیقی and Bella’s [*cough* and Lorabell’s *cough*] lady bits

21. Charlie is always always always fishing… I mean, dude get a life - no one fishes 24/7 not even in Canon

22. Jacob is bad. If he’s not bad, he’s gay. If he’s not gay, he’s a dog. Literally.

23. Mike is a douche. No matter what he does and how nice he is, he’s always a douche with a small dick

24. EVERY TIME Bella and Edward have sex, it’s better than the last and the best sex they have ever had. EVER.

25. Jake almost ALWAYS ends up with Leah

26. Rosalie always smacks Emmet on the back of his head… if she’s not around then it’s Esme

27. They always rip condoms with their teeth

28. At one time یا another you’ll find that “she/he saw something unreadable flicker in his/her eyes but it disappeared before she/he could see what it was”

29. The مصنف will almost always sneak in at least one book یا movie quote

30. When most normal people would have reached for the telephone and dialed 911, Bella is NOT freaked out سے طرف کی Edward watching her sleep

Elle-C, BloodyObsession and 3 others like this

2

True Lies,Teen Girls(Chapteer Twelve)

posted by moolah

Bye Guys-post مزید tonite I am going swimming right now!!!!♥

Bye Guys-post more tonite I am going swimming right now!!!!♥

Rosalie’s P.O.V:
I led the man to the سوفی, لٹانا with his grandmother. I sat down and turned the ویژن ٹیلی off, “So, what did آپ need sir?” “I need آپ to turn me and my grandmother.” He said. “Excuse me?” “Turn us, please.” I started freaking out, because my identity was a secret, “CARLISLE!” I screamed at the سب, سب سے اوپر of my lungs, “Miss, please I will شاور آپ with wealth.” Carlisle came running down the stairs, “Umm, can آپ excuse us for a second?” I asked him. “Sure, Rosalie, I’ll just talk to my grandmother about preparations.” I nodded, “You do that.”...

6

Unexpected gifts [4]

posted by Tatti

I'm sorry for posting three chapters with "unexpexted" instead of "unexpected", I edited that and feel pretty stupid XD Hope you'll enjoy my new chapter.

***

4th chapter Guessing

Edward

"And what is wrong with Emi being so fast?" Rosalie asked angrily when we returned home.You're jealous, that's it. I rolled my eyes at her mental tone - there was no way that Rosalie would turn against baby whom she wished for so long.
"There's nothing wrong with her" I answered as calmly as I could "If there is something wrong, that would be the situation - three half-vampire babies left on our stairs. Doesn't...

4

~Ever After 9~

posted by LexisFaith

"Momma. I want to go back down stairs." Sarah was sitting on her bed, her back against the wall.
"I know." I sighed. "But Daddy is talking to Seth right now so we are going to stay up here untill they are done."
She sighed and leaned her head against the wall.
I listened to Jacob and Seth down stairs.
"So that's how it works?" Seth asked.
"Yea." Jacob sighed.
"Cool." I could hear the smile in Seth's voice.
"Look, I'm really sorry if you're mad at me but آپ know, I couldn't controll it. I didn't even know what was going on."
"Yea, I know. I'm not mad at you, though." I heard Jacob settle back down...

2

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. 5~ [FIVE]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Five
BuffyFaithfan1
_______________________________
[FIVE]
THE اگلے MORNING, Jerek woke me up with a light kiss to the cheek. I never was a deep sleeper, and the slightest sounds would wake me up. But, lately it seems, that I've been sleeping مزید deeply then I ever have before. It was already noon, and I wasn't surprised everyone slept that long. In fact, half of the other people here were still sleeping. I ate lunch with Jerek and Tabra in Jerek's room, while Jerek told Tabra and I the story of what happened the night of the Final Fight. ...

2

A Youtube Script(episode four)Help!

posted by moolah

*episode four*
*HELP!*
Bella’s P.O.V:
*thinking*
I felt really shaky
And really scared
Alice kept on laughing wickedly
I kept on screaming
*done thinking*
Alice: Bella, آپ had your chance-you WILL die now.
Bella: *passes out*
Alice: *goes back to normal* BELLA!
Bella: *bleeding everywhere*
Alice: *Screams* HELP!!!!!!!! HELP!!!!!! *kicks down the door*
Edward: *runs toward her* ALICE! WHAT THE HELL DID آپ DO?
Alice: *vomits* Omigod. *looks at the vomit* Edward…*there is blood in the vomit*
Edward: *looks down at the vomit* Ali…
Alice: *runs out*
Edward: *looks down at Bella* BELLA! *picks her up and...

4

The Loss (chapter two)

posted by a-jforever

After fixing and eating چائے I decided I was tired enough to go to bed. It was ten o’clock so I guess it was acceptable. I climbed under the cold sheets, quickly falling asleep, dreaming of my visit to Renesmee’s tomorrow.

I moaned as my alarm went off knowing it was six thirty and that I had to go to school. I switched on my giant stereo dancing around to some of my favourite songs while I was showering and getting dressed. سے طرف کی the time I had turned if off and got down stairs my parents had already left for work which ment I needed to hunt for my keys. There was a knock at the front door....

6

Unexpected gifts [3]

posted by Tatti

Here comes new chapter and I hope you'll like it. Big thanks to all who supports my fanfic and all nice تبصرے آپ leave.

***
3rd chapter Running

Edward

I can see that Bella is worrying and I even can understand it - three half-vampire babies pops out of nowhere and only short letter from mysterious vampire Doreen informs us that they are abandoned and we should take care of them. At first, I was a bit suspicious too, but now I can't see what would be the point of leaving these kids if someone would meant harm to us. Volturi already know about vampire and human hybrids and accepted them as not...

4

True Lies,Teen Girls(Chapter Ten)

posted by moolah

Homemade Banner

Bella’s P.O.V:
I was hyperventilating when I stepped into the Cullen garage. I saw the car Ali and Jazz had taken me into to Arizona. And then the car that had come back when I was “dead” with Ali as my visitor. The car I promised Edward I would wait until after graduation for my wish made me cry the most. The one where we ran into Jacob-and went into the woods.
Although I was supposed to go to the hotel Carlisle told me to go strait to Alice and Edward. I had Cullen clothes on so I would smell like a vampire. I did. I smelled like all my پسندیدہ people. Emmett, Alice, Edward, Esme, Carlisle,...

3

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. 5~ [THREE]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Five
BuffyFaithfan1
_______________________________
[THREE]
    At times, as I tried to find Jerek, I saw people dropping to the ground, a head یا two flying past my face, blood being sprayed in the air. But I knew that none of them was more, nor Tabra, nor Jerek.
    And I was certain.
    I kept on walking, killing few here and there, and finally, I saw Jerek and Haus.
    They were off to the side, like I was with the other people, and I kept walking that way slowly, making sure Haus...

1

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. 4~ [EIGHT]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Four
BuffyFaithfan1
_________________________
[EIGHT]
    I quit crying a few منٹ later. I just laid there for the few hours of time we had to ourselves. I didn't need to train, I was ready for this battle. The Final Fight, I would win. I was ready.
    And then, it was time to go.
    I checked my eyes so no one would ask me if I was crying, and I was good. I went to the weapons room, geared up, and grabbed my essentials: a cross-bow and a stake.
    "Let's do this." I said, and we started...

2

Robert Pattinson Related to Dracula?

posted by Hellohoudini

Robert Pattinson Related to Dracula?
سے طرف کی Twilight_News |

According to ET:

“The Associated Press says researchers at Ancestry.com have connected Pattinson and the Transylvanian ruler through their relationship to the British royal family; the site claims Pattinson is a distant cousin of Princes Harry and William, who are distant nephews of Vlad the Impaler.
“Tracing Pattinson’s family back to Vlad was difficult research, but the pieces that unraveled created the perfect accompaniment to ‘The Twilight Saga,’” کہا Anastasia Tyler, a genealogist at Ancestry.com. “Without any myth یا magic, we find royalty and vampires lurking in Pattinson’s life — making his story just as supernatural as the one he’s playing on screen.”

5

(Doesn't have a name yet)

posted by jacob_lover5253

Heyy I am back. The doctor کہا I did have a concussion so I had to be woken up multiple times last night. On the bright side I finished
Bella's POV... if this is to confusing let me know. -Kayla

End of Chapter 6. (Jacob)

I heard the door open as he peeked his head in. Great it's morning time already. As soon as Charlie went into the bathroom I jumped out of her window.

I walked around to the front of the house and knocked on the door. Charlie answered within minutes.

"Hey, Jacob, hold on I'll get her." Wow it's like he can read my mind. I heard him walking up the creaking steps. "Bells, آپ awake,...

1

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. 4~ [THREE]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Four
BuffyFaithfan1
_______________________________
[THREE]
    LATER THAT NIGHT: I had some ice-cream with Tabra, and we talked about things we used to do.
    "Remember when we played the PS2?" He asked and I laughed.
    "I kicked your butt in Crash Bandacoot !" I کہا and he laughed.
    "I know, I sucked at that game!" He said.
    "Yea, that's why I made آپ play it with me." I laughed and he did too.
    "Really?" He asked, and I nodded and took...

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. 4~ [TWO]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Four
BuffyFaithfan1
_______________________________
[TWO]
    I yelped and jerked. I then screamed and I woke up. Jerek was sitting up اگلے to me, holding my hands down so I didn't lash out. He looked at me once I opened my eyes.
    "Are آپ okay?" Jerek asked me, looking worried.
    "Yea, I'm fine. I just had a nightmare." I said.
    "We'll try to go back to sleep okay? It's only six a.m." Jerek کہا and I laid back down اگلے to him.
    "Do آپ think the others heard...

1

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. 4~ [ONE]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Four
BuffyFaithfan1
_______________________________
[PREVIOUSLY]
Hi, my name is Cyd, short for Cydnee, and one دن while I was grocery shopping, a former member of the Death Clan of the Fallen threw a چھری at my head. I ducked behind my cart, and ran out of the store once I saw the چھری fly into a bunch of egg cartons. I went home, told my friend Tabra about it, and he came rushing over. He helped me get out of the aftershock feeling, and when we were eating chicken sandwhiches, mine was coated in poison. We then went to his apartment,...

2

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. 3~ [TWENTY]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Three
BuffyFaithfan1
_______________________________
[TWENTY]
    WHEN I GOT OUT: I dried off, got dressed, drained the tub, rinsed the extra suds off of the tub, dried my hair, ran my fingers through it, and went out into Jerek's bedroom and saw him waiting for me.
    "Hey," He said, and patted the بستر اگلے to him.
    He was shirtless, of course, and as I walked to him, I noticed that the tattoo on him was looking darker. Maybe I was just looking at it and it was popping out at me یا something. Anyways,...

3

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. 3~ [SIX]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Three
BuffyFaithfan1
_______________________________
[SIX]
    We got into Jerek's car, and he started back to his hous یا headquarters, wherever Jerek was taking us too.
    "So, do آپ have the symbol of the Death Clan on you?" I asked Jerek. Tabra was laying in the back, and Jerek and I were in the front.
    "Yea, I do. I regret seeing it everyday, I regret what I did the little time I was there. But I do."
    "Have آپ forgiven yourself?"
    "Not fully." He said,...

2

the new beginig ch4 " dOnt have tittle yet lOl"

posted by sh0rtiinedward

I didn’t know what was happening, who was this guy I got the feel that I know him for a long time. I started walking to the door when the گھنٹی, بیل rang, and as I was crossing the door Julius passed سے طرف کی me real quick.
“I don’t know nothing about this guy, but I have to find out as soon is possible” I کہا to my self. I started walking to my اگلے class, and for my surprise he was there too, so I نشست اگلے to him again and………….
“Hello my name is Rennesme Cullen” I کہا to him, very polite
“Hi I’m Julius” he کہا as he turn around to my direction and meet with my eyes, he was...

4

the new beginig ch3 :Welcome to the real life"

posted by sh0rtiinedward

I can’t believe this is Monday already, time to go to school and act human, with all those people “Humans”
“Nessi are آپ ready honey” my aunt Alice yelled.
“Yes I’m on my way” I graph my backpack and I started walking to the door.
“Rennesme sweetheart can we talk for a minute” my mom asked me
“Sure mom”
“Well honey tell me what’s going on? I see آپ that آپ are very sad”
“Mom I feel so bad, I can’t understand what’s going on, I fell so badly with JACOB, I told very horrible stuff and now I need him, he was my best friend and my big brother. He was there for me...

1

Hello, My Name Is: Death ~Vol. Two~ [FIVE]

posted by BuffyFaithFan1

Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume Two
BuffyFaithfan1
_______________________
[FIVE]
    And then she dropped to the floor. I heard a gunshot and saw Tabra standing behind her lifeless body.
    That's when the others marched in. I grabbed my gun, and we started shooting at the people that came in.
    Finally, in the end, they were all gone.
    "You really think آپ can kill me!?" A voice said, and we turned to see Haus holding a sword from the wall. He was drooling blood, and he looked . "You can't kill me!" He then thrusted...